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Counseling Process (Communication Skills)

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Counseling Process (Communication Skills) (Communication Skills) Introduction to Communication and the Skill of Visibly Tuning in to CADETS (ATTENDING) a. – PowerPoint PPT presentation

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Title: Counseling Process (Communication Skills)


1
Counseling Process (Communication Skills)
USNSCC
2
(Communication Skills)
  • Introduction to Communication and the Skill of
    Visibly Tuning in to CADETS (ATTENDING)
  •   a. The Importance of Dialogue in Helping
  • Conversations between Staff and Cadets should be
    a therapeutic or helping dialogue.

3
(Communication Skills)
  • The Importance of Dialogue in Helping
  • There are four requirements of true dialogue
  • Turn taking
  • Connecting
  • Mutual influencing
  • Co-creating outcomes

4
(Communication Skills)
  • b. Visibly Tuning In To Cadets The Importance
    of Empathic Presence
  • At some of the more dramatic moments in life,
    simply being with another person is extremely
    important
  • Most people appreciate it when other pay
    attention to them.  By the same token, being
    ignored is often painful
  • Attending, or visibly tuning in to others,
    contributes to empathic presence
  • Visibly tuning in as an expression of empathy
    tells Cadets you are with them and puts you in a
    position to listen carefully

5
(Communication Skills)
  • b. Visibly Tuning In To Cadets The Importance
    of Empathic Presence
  • (1) Nonverbal Behavior as a Channel of
    Communication
  • Body behavior (posture, body movements and
    gestures)
  • Eye behavior (eye contact, staring and eye
    movement)
  • Facial expressions (smiles, frowns, raised
    eyebrows, twisted lips)

6
(Communication Skills)
  • b. Visibly Tuning In To Cadets The Importance
    of Empathic Presence
  • Voice-related behavior (tone of voice, pitch,
    volume, intensity, inflection, spacing of words,
    emphases, pauses, silences, fluency)
  • Observable autonomic physiological responses
    (quickened breathing, blushing, paleness and
    pupil dilation)
  • Physical characteristics (fitness, height, weight
    and complexion)

7
(Communication Skills)
  • b. Visibly Tuning In To Cadets The Importance
    of Empathic Presence
  • Space (how close a person chooses to be during
    conversation)
  • General appearance (grooming and dress)

8
(Communication Skills)
  • (2) Staffs Nonverbal Behavior
  • Before you begin interpreting the nonverbal
    behavior of your Cadets, take a look at yourself.
  • At times your nonverbal behavior is as important
    than your words.
  • Your nonverbal behavior influences Cadet for
    better or worse.
  • In your nonverbal behavior, Cadets read cues that
    indicate the quality of your presence them.

9
(Communication Skills)
  • (2) Staffs Nonverbal Behavior
  • Attentive presence can invite or encourage them
    to trust you, open up, and explore the
    significant dimensions of their problem
    situations.
  • Half-hearted presence can promote distrust and
    lead to Cadets reluctance to reveal themselves to
    you.
  • Part of listening is being sensitive of to
    Cadets reactions to your nonverbal behavior.
  • Effective Staff are mindful of the stream of
    nonverbal messages they send to Cadets.

10
(Communication Skills)
  • (3) The Skill of Visibly Tuning in to Cadets
  • You can use certain key nonverbal skills to
    visibly tune into clients.
  • These skills can be summarized in the acronym
    SOLER.

11
(Communication Skills)
  • (3) The Skill of Visibly Tuning in to Cadets
    (Cont)
  • S Face the client Squarely.
  • O Adopt an Open posture.
  • L Lean toward the other.
  • E Maintain good Eye contact.
  • R Try to be Relaxed.

12
(Communication Skills)
  • 3. Active Listening The Foundation of
    Understanding
  • a. Inadequate Listening
  • Non-listening
  • Partial listening
  • Tape-recorder listening
  • Rehearsing

13
(Communication Skills)
  • Empathic Listening
  • Empathic listening centers on the kind of
    attending, observing, and listening the kind of
    being with needed to develop an understanding
    of Cadets and their worlds.

14
(Communication Skills)
  • Listening to Words Cadets stories, points of
    view, decisions, and intentions or proposals
  • (1) Listening to stories
  • Stories tend to be mixtures of clients
  • Experiences
  • Behaviors
  • Affect Feelings, emotions, and moods

15
(Communication Skills)
  • Listening to Words Cadets stories, points of
    view, decisions, and intentions or proposals
  • (2) Listening to points of view
  • As Cadets tell their stories, explore
    possibilities for a better future, set goals,
    make plans, and review obstacles to
    accomplishing these plans, they often share
    their points of view.
  • Cadets may share their points of view
    about everything under the sun. The ones that
    are relevant to their problem situation or
    undeveloped opportunities need to be
    listened to and understood.

16
(Communication Skills)
  • Listening to Words Cadets stories, points of
    view, decisions, and intentions or proposals
  • (3) Listening to decisions
  • Decisions usually have implications for
    the decision maker and for others. Sharing
    a decision fully means spelling out the
    decision itself, the reasons for the
    decision, the implications for self and
    others, and some indication as to whether the
    decision or any part of it is open to review.

17
(Communication Skills)
  • Listening to Words Cadets stories, points of
    view, decisions, and intentions or proposals
  • (4) Listening to intentions or proposals
  • Cadets state intentions, offer proposals,
    or make a case for certain courses of action.
    A case often includes what they want to
    do, the reasons for doing it and the
    implications for themselves or others.
    When clients talk about their concerns they mix
    all these forms of discourse together.

18
(Communication Skills)
  • Listening to Words Cadets stories, points of
    view, decisions, and intentions or proposals
  • (5) Hearing opportunities and resources
  • If you listen only for problems, you will
    end up talking mainly about problems, and
    in doing so you will short change your
    clients. Every cadet has something going
    for him or her. Your job is to spot Cadets
    resources and help them invest these into
    managing problem situations and opportunities.
    If people generally use only a fraction of
    their potential, then there is much to be
    tapped.

19
(Communication Skills)
  • Listening to Cadets nonverbal messages and
    modifiers
  • Cadets send messages through their nonverbal
    behavior. The ability of people to read these
    messages can contribute to their relationship
    well being. Staffs need to learn how to read
    these messages without distorting or over
    interpreting them.

20
(Communication Skills)
  • Listening to Cadets nonverbal messages and
    modifiers
  • All kinds of nonverbal behavior can punctuate
    or modify verbal communications in the following
    ways
  • Confirming or repeating
  • Denying or confusing
  • Strengthening or emphasizing
  • Adding intensity
  • Controlling or regulating

21
(Communication Skills)
  • Processing what you hear The thoughtful search
    for meaning
  • Thoughtful processing includes
  • Identify key messages and feelings
  • Understand clients through context
  • Hear the slant or spin (Tough-minded listening
    and processing)

22
(Communication Skills)
  • Listening to oneself The Staff Cadet/Officer
    internal conversation
  • The conversation Cadets have with themselves
    during helping sessions is the internal
    conversation. To be an effective helper, you
    need to listen not only to the Cadet but also to
    yourself.
  • Staff can use this second channel to listen
    to what they are saying to themselves, their
    nonverbal behavior, and their feeling and
    emotions.

23
(Communication Skills)
  • The shadow side of listening to Cadets
  • (1) Forms of Distorted listening
  • Filtered listening
  • Evaluative listening
  • Stereotype-based listening
  • Fact-centered rather than person-centered
    listening
  • Sympathetic listening
  • Interrupting

24
(Communication Skills)
  • Sharing Empathic Highlights
  • Communicating and Checking Understanding
  • a. Responding skills
  • Staffs respond to Cadets in a variety of
    ways. They share their understanding, they check
    to make sure they got things right, they ask
    questions, they probe for clarity, and they
    challenge clients in a variety of ways. When
    Staffs communicate accurate understandings to
    Cadets, they help their Cadets understand
    themselves more fully.

25
(Communication Skills)
  • b. The three dimensions of responding skills
    Perceptiveness, know how, and assertiveness
  • The communication skills involved in responding
    to Cadets have three dimensions
  • Perceptiveness
  • Know-how
  • Assertiveness

26
(Communication Skills)
  •   c. Sharing empathic highlights
  • Communicating understanding to Cadets
  • If visibly tuning in and listening are the
    skills that enable Staffs to get in touch with
    the world of the Cadet, then sharing highlights
    is the skill that enables them both to
    communicate their understanding of that world and
    to check the accuracy of that understanding.

27
(Communication Skills)
  • The key building blocks of empathic highlights
  • (1) The Basic Formula
  •   Basic empathic understanding can be
    expressed in the following stylized formula
  • You feelname the correct emotion expressed by
    the Cadet
  • Becauseindicate the correct experiences and
    behaviors that give rise to the feelings.

28
(Communication Skills)
  • The key building blocks of empathic highlights
  • (2) Respond Accurately to Cadets Feelings,
    Emotions, and Moods
  • Staffs need to respond to Cadets emotions
    in such a way as to move the helping
    process forward. This means identifying key
    emotions the Cadet either expresses or
    discusses (Staff perceptiveness) and
    weaving them into the dialogue (Staff know-
    how) even when they are sensitive or part of a
    messy situation (Staff courage or
    assertiveness).

29
(Communication Skills)
  • The key building blocks of empathic highlights
  • (2) Respond Accurately to Cadets Feelings,
    Emotions, and Moods
  • Use the right family of emotions and the right
    intensity.
  • Distinguish between expressed or discussed
    feelings.
  • Read and respond to feelings and emotions
    embedded in clients nonverbal behavior.
  • Be sensitive in naming emotions.
  • Use different ways to share highlights about
    feeling or emotions
  • Neither overemphasize nor underemphasize
    feelings, emotions, and moods.

30
(Communication Skills)
  • The key building blocks of empathic highlights
  • (3) Respond Accurately to the Key Experiences
    and Behaviors in Cadets Stories
  • Key experiences and behaviors give rise to
    Cadets feelings, emotions, and moods. The
    because in the empathic highlight formula
    is to be followed by an indication of the
    experiences and behaviors that underlie the
    Cadets feelings.

31
(Communication Skills)
  • The key building blocks of empathic highlights
  • (4) Respond with Highlights to Cadets Points of
    View, Decisions, and Proposals
  • By sharing highlights, you communicate to
    Cadets that you are working hard at
    understanding them to foster constructive
    change. This means not only understanding the
    key elements of the stories they tell but
    also the key elements of anything they
    share with you.
  • It goes without saying that points of
    view, decisions, and proposals are, like
    stories, permeated to one degree or another
    with feeling and emotions.

32
(Communication Skills)
  • Principles of sharing highlights
  • These guidelines are principles, not formulas to
    be followed slavishly.
  • Use empathic highlights at every stage and step
    of the helping process.
  • Respond selectively to Cadets core messages
  • Respond to the context, not just the words
  • Use highlights as a mild social-influence process
  • Use highlights to stimulate movement in the
    helping process.
  • Recover from inaccurate understandings
  • Use empathic highlights to bridge diversity gaps

33
(Communication Skills)
  • f. Tactics for communicating highlights
  • Give yourself time to think
  • Use short responses
  • Gear your responses to the Cadet but remain
    yourself

34
(Communication Skills)
  • A Caution The importance of empathic
    Relationships
  • In day-to-day conversation, sharing empathic
    highlights is a tool of civility. Making an
    effort to get in touch with your conversational
    partners frame of reference sends a message of
    respect. Therefore, sharing highlights plays an
    important part in building relationship.
    However, the communication skills as practiced in
    helping settings dont automatically transfer to
    ordinary social settings of everyday life.

35
(Communication Skills)
  • The shadow side of sharing empathic highlights
  • Some things that should be avoided
  • No response
  • Distracting questions
  • Clichés
  • Interpretations
  • Advice
  • Parroting
  • Sympathy and agreement
  • Faking it

36
(Communication Skills)
  • 5. The art of probing and summarizing
  • Prompts and probes are
  • Verbal and sometimes non-verbal tactics for
    helping clients talk more freely and concretely
    about themselves.

37
(Communication Skills)
  • a. Nonverbal and verbal prompts
  • Nonverbal prompts
  •   You can use various behaviors
    bodily movements, gestures, nods,
    eye movement, and the like as nonverbal
    prompts
  • Vocal and verbal prompts
  •   You can use responses um,
    uh-huh, sure, yes, I see, ah,
    okay, and oh as prompts, provided you use
    them intentionally and they are not simply a
    sign that your attention is flagging, you
    dont know what else to do, or you are on
    automatic pilot.

38
(Communication Skills)
  • b. Different forms of probes
  •  
  • Probes used judiciously, help Cadets
    name, take notice of, explore, clarify, or
    further define any issue. Designed to provide
    clarity and move things forward, probes can take
    different forms
  • Statements
  • Requests
  • Questions
  • Words or phrases that are, in effect, Questions
    or requests

39
(Communication Skills)
  • c. Using questions effectively
  • Novices and inept counselors, tend to ask
    too many questions. When in doubt about what
    to say or do, they ask questions that add no
    value. It is as if gathering information were
    the goal of the helping interview. Social
    intelligence calls for restraint. However,
    questions can be an important part of your
    interactions with clients. Two guidelines to
    follow
  • Ask a limited number of questions
  • Ask open ended questions

40
(Communication Skills)
  • d. Principles in the use of probes
  •   Use probes to
  • Help Cadets engage as fully as possible in the
    therapeutic dialogue.
  • Help Cadets achieve concreteness and clarity.
  • Help Cadets complete the picture.
  • Help Cadets get a balanced view of problem
    situations and opportunities.
  • Challenge Cadets and help them challenge
    themselves.

41
(Communication Skills)
  • f. The art of summarizing providing focus and
    direction
  • There are certain times when summaries
    prove particularly useful
  • At the beginning of a new session
  • During a session that is going nowhere
  • When a Cadet gets stuck
  • When a Cadet needs a new perspective

42
(Communication Skills)
  • g. How to become proficient in using
    communication skills
  • Understanding communication skills and how
    they fit into the counseling process is one
    thing. Becoming proficient in their use is
    another. Some trainees think that they can learn
    these soft skills easily and fail to put
    in the kind of hard work and practice needed
    to become fluent in them.

43
(Communication Skills)
  • h. Shadow-side realities of communication
    skills
  • Being good at communication skills is not
    the same as being good at helping. Moreover,
    an overemphasis on communication skills
    can turn helping into a great deal of talk
    with very little action, and few outcomes.

44
(Communication Skills)
  • Summary and Review
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