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Mothering After Domestic Violence:

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Mothering After Domestic Violence: Hands-on Activities for Intervening with Abused Women As Mothers Alison Cunningham, M.A.(Crim.) Linda Baker, Ph.D., C.Psych. – PowerPoint PPT presentation

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Title: Mothering After Domestic Violence:


1
Mothering After Domestic Violence
  • Hands-on Activities for Intervening with Abused
    Women As Mothers
  • Alison Cunningham, M.A.(Crim.)
  • Linda Baker, Ph.D., C.Psych.
  • Centre for Children Families in the Justice
    System

2
Centre for Children Families in the Justice
System
  • Formerly the London Family Court Clinic
  • opened 1974
  • clinical programs
  • about 30 staff
  • also research, training, resource development

3
World Conference 2008Edmonton
4
Agenda
  1. Context for our work
  2. Desconstructing Economic Abuse to inform
    parenting interventions
  3. Customizing the Power Control Wheel

5
Research(This will be quick and painless)
6
73 of articles from 2000 or later
7
Little material addresses intervention
8
Overview of Research
  • adversity package
  • cumulative effect
  • complexity
  • continuum of aggression and abuse

9
80 with battered mother had 1 or more other
Adverse Childhood Experience
10
A Research Interlude
11
Parenting Support for Survivors
  • Engage by providing hope and a framework
    narrative for her and her childrens experience
  • Describe impacts of abuse on mother-child
    relationships and mothering
  • Enhance understanding of her children --
    developmental stages, potential impacts, roles,
    coping

12
Parenting Support for Survivors
  • Present guidelines for talking with children
    about abuse
  • Offer parenting strategies to help children
    thrive
  • Give permission for personal care

13
Deconstructing Economic Abuse (EA)to Inform
Parenting Support
14
After this session, you will be better able to
  • Identify new ways of using the PC wheel to
    engage and support women
  • Describe ways to use this approach to inform
    interventions on parenting

15
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16
Power Control Wheel
  • Pros
  • Widely used recognized
  • Useful to women
  • Adaptable, flexible
  • Conveys nonphysical abuse
  • Cons
  • Oversimplifies
  • Not inclusive of all forms of control tactics
  • risks a one-size fits all interpretation

17
Our Approach
  • Deconstruct the slices
  • Why? It helps a woman to
  • make links to her life
  • better understand complex concepts
  • make links to how children were affected
  • communicate her experience to others

18
Deconstructing Economic Abuse
  • how it affected me then now
  • how it affected my children then now
  • parenting strategies to counter the effects

19
Case Study Video Clip
  • What is the nature of the abuse?
  • What messages is the son learning?

20
Based on the case study what you observed in
the video, complete
  • Exercise 1 Checklist for Economic Abuse During
    Relationship.
  • Exercise 78 Messages Children Learn from EA.

21
Given the abuse messages you checked off,
discuss
  • What might be the effect on the mother-child
    relationships?
  • What might be the effect on mothering?

22
  • To more fully answer the preceding questions,
    you need to unravel the impact of
    rationalizations on women and on children.

23
Go to Exercise 4Rationalizations for EA
  • Review material
  • Link to case study and video

24
Benefits of Unraveling Impacts of
rationalizations
  • Financial realities of now create faux
    legitimization of rationalizations from then
  • Faux legitimization of rationalizations fuels
    their internalization

25
Benefits of Unraveling Impacts of
rationalizations
  • Prevent their perpetuation with self and children
  • Recognize in future partners

26
.
  • Describe some parenting strategies/approaches
    this mother might use to help counter the effects
    of economic abuse.

27
Parenting Approaches Informed by Understanding
the Effects of Economic Abuse and Its
Rationalizations
28
Neutralize emotions related to money, e.g.s,
  • Divide allowance contingent unconditional
    portion
  • Set and communicate appropriate expectations
  • Supportively problem solve if child is
    unsuccessful

29
Neutralize emotions related to money, e.g.s,
  • Set and hold givens, while providing some choice
  • Keep the adult part of finances among adults

30
Teach building blocks for economic partnerships,
e.g.,
  • Engage children in family planning and decision
    making around spending set amount of money for
    family fun (e.g., pizza, video, swimming, ice
    cream in park)

31
Teach gender equality, e.g.,
  • Use the same guidelines and rules for sons and
    daughters
  • Draw attention to female role models for
    financial competence

32
Teach financial skills, e.g.,
  • Use talk aloud strategies to model financial
    skills and decision making
  • Comparison shop with children (e.g. grocery)
  • Encourage children to save a small amount of any
    money they receive

33
Model the use of money in a healthy way, e.g.,
  • Plan and make a donation as a family
  • Involve children in gift buying

34
Take Home Message
  • Acknowledging womens experience is a safe way to
    engage her around parenting
  • Deconstructing abuse can help women make the link
    to how children were effected

35
Take Home Message
  • Understanding this link creates buy in and
    informs the development and application of
    compensatory parenting strategies
  • The combination of buy in, individualization,
    and realistic strategies, increase the chance for
    action

36
Break
37
Customizing the Power Control Wheel to Inform
Parenting
38
As a result of this session, you will be better
able to
  • Identify ways to customize the Power Control
    Wheel with individual women
  • Describe activities using a customized wheel to
    counter the effects of abuse on the mother-child
    relationship and parenting

39
Our Approach
  • Customize the wheel
  • Select relevant pieces
  • Scale slice proportions
  • Add missing slices
  • Use to prioritize intervention with women
  • Link to childrens experiences
  • Inform parenting strategies to counter effects on
    children

40
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41
Marys Wheels
  • First Mary drew the frequency of each type of
    abuse she experienced
  • Then Mary drew the degree of impact on her today
    of each type of abuse she experienced. She wrote
    down how she was impacted in each slice.

42
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43
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44
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45
In pairs, draw a customized wheel for Odelia
  • use the P C Wheel as a reference (p. 12 in
    package)
  • list types of abuse Odelia
  • experienced
  • size slices based on the degree of impact of each
    type of abuse on Odelia
  • write how she was impacted in each slice

46
Share compare wheels at your tableDo your
wheels differ from those of others at your table?
47
  • Abuse is personal
  • Approaches that are individualized
  • Join where the woman is
  • Facilitate engagement
  • Are more likely to be helpful

48
In pairs, draw a customized wheel for Odelias
son
  • List types of abuse her son was exposed to or
    experienced
  • Size slices based on the degree of impact each
    type of abuse might have on how he views Odelia
    their relationship
  • Write down impacts in each slice

49
  • Compare and contrast the wheel you made for
    Odelia with the wheel you made for her son.

50
  • Whats most salient to child may differ from what
    is salient to mother
  • Even within the same family each childs
    perceptions may differ
  • Important to support women to support children to
    express their experience

51
Lipschitz et al. (1999)
  • 74 adolescents in in-patient psychiatric setting
  • 93 reported at least 1 category of trauma
    including child abuse and exposure to family
    violence or community violence
  • 76 reported at least 2 categories of trauma
  • average 2.5 traumas per youth

52
Which was most stressful for you?
53
Potential Impacts on Sons Relationship with
Odelia
  • Diminished respect for mother
  • Diminished belief she can care for him or protect
    him
  • Angry at her for.
  • Guilty for not protecting her
  • Afraid she thinks hes like Dad
  • Believes he should be new power figure in
    family
  • Proud of her courage

54
Parenting Strategies
  • Identify 2 parenting strategies (be specific) to
    counter the effects on their relationship and/or
    mothering.

55
Believes he should be new power figure in
family
56
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57
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58
Other Uses of the WheelSize slices by
  • Fequency of each type of abuse used against me
    against my child
  • Abuse I worry most about my child using against
    me with his peers
  • Abuse I worry beginning in my new relationship
  • Degree of impact of each type of abuse on me
    (then, now) as a mother (then,now)

59
Other Uses of the WheelSize slices by
  • Degree of impact of each type of abuse on
    children (one wheel/child)

60
Guided self-discovery, with support, can lead to
action
  1. join with women around their experience of
    abuse,
  2. move to their experience of abuse as mothers,
  3. make natural extension to children,
  4. drawing on of the above, shift focus to
    parenting.

61
Applications
  • Self-study
  • One-to-one work (mother, child)
  • Group work (mothers, children)
  • Concurrent mother and child groups
  • Joint work with mother child

62
Take Home Message
  • The more successful we are at individualizing
    intervention, then the more likely women will
  • be engaged
  • experience genuine understanding
  • Acknowledge parenting needs/limitations

63
Take Home Message
  • Abused women will benefit from parenting support
    that
  • Offers hope
  • starts where a woman is,
  • supports expression of her narrative
  • supports both the woman and her children

64
Take Home Message
  • provides an explanatory framework for her
    experience that can be personalized
  • enables bridging to her childrens experiences
  • Includes peer support
  • leads to action

65
WHAT ABOUT ME!
  • Seeking to Understand the Childs View of
    Violence in the Family (2004)
  • Cunningham Baker
  • Summary of best evidence from the literature

66
HELPING CHILDREN THRIVE
  • Supporting Woman Abuse Survivors as Mothers A
    resource to support parenting (2004)
  • handouts for women background information for
    service providers

67
Little Eyes, Little Ears
  • Little Eyes, Little Ears How Violence Against a
    Mothers Shapes Children as they Grow
  • Order from the National Clearinghouse on Family
    Violence
  • Également en français

68
Our Contact Info
  • www.lfcc.on.ca
  • linda.baker_at_lfcc.on.ca
  • alison.cunningham_at_lfcc.on.ca
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