Unit 2 Communication Problems

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Unit 2 Communication Problems
2
Warming-up Activities
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Activity 1 Enjoy Jokes
Directions Discuss in groups what made you laugh
and what caused the problem in communication in
the jokes.

• Three old pilots are walking on the ramp.
• The first one says,
• Windy, isnt it?
• The second says, No, its Thursday!
• The third one says, So am I. Lets go get a
  beer.

4

• (In the kitchen )
• Woman Oh dear. Today is terrible. Im too tired
  to stand.
• Man Really? You are just standing and cooking
  quickly.

5

• (At the dinner table)
• W Dear, to be honest, how does the food taste?
• M I want to say its delicious to please you,
  but to be honest, it is a bit salty.

6

• W Im gaining weight. Dear, what can I do?
• M Try to eat less fat. You should keep yourself
  slim like Mrs. Smith.
• W I know Mrs. Smith is slimmer and prettier. Why
  didnt you marry her instead?

7

• (After the dinner)
• W Dear, we havent gone shopping for years.
• M Really? Last Sunday, we did and you bought a
  lot of things. I cant believe you forget things
  so quickly.

8
Activity 2 Gender Differences
Directions Read the following pages about
differences between men and women.
In what aspects are men and women different from
each other?
9
Money
Money

• A man will pay 2 for a 1 item he wants
• A woman will pay 1 for a 2 item she does not
  want

10
Arguments

• A woman has the last word in any argument.
• Anything a man says after that is the beginning
  of a new argument.

11
Dressing Up

• A woman will dress up to go shopping, to water
  the plants, to empty the garbage, to answer the
  phone, to read a book, or to get the mail.
• A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

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Dealing with Anger and Emotions

• Men will deal with stress by punching inanimate
  objects such as a door or steering wheel and
  blame clubs, bats, bowling balls etc. for poor
  performance.
• Women will make sniffling noises and sigh heavily
  or they will clamp hands over their face and
  weep. When questioned, they keep saying, Oh
  nothing over and over.

13
Attitude toward each other

• The most frequently expressed complaint Women
  have about men is that Men dont listen.
• The most frequently expressed complaint Men have
  about Women is that Women are always trying to
  change them.

14
Men and women speak different languages

• Men think facts first and then feelings
• Women think feelings first and then facts

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Complaints Responses

• Woman says
• We never go out.
• Man responds
• Thats not true. We went out last week
• Woman says
• Everyone ignores me
• Man responds
• Im sure some people notice you

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Men and Women have different emotional needs

• Women need to receive
• Care
• Understanding
• Respect
• Devotion
• Reassurance

• Men need to receive
• Trust
• Acceptance
• Appreciation
• Admiration
• Approval
• Encouragement

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• ??????,????????????????,??????????
• ?????????????????????
• ??????,???????????????,??????????
• ??????,???????????????,?????????????
• ???????????,??????????????????????,???????????
• ?????????,????????????,????????????????,??????????
  ????????,?????????
• ??????????,??????????????????,?????????
• (???)

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Lead-in
Part 1 Listening-in Keys
1.D 2.B 3.B 4.A 5.B 6.C 7.B 8.D
9.C 10.D
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Lead-in
1. M Oh, why wake me up? I dont have to go to
work today! W I know that but I just want
you to help me prepare for the evening party. We
need some champagne and beer and Q What do
we learn about the two speakers from the
conversation?
20
2. M I wish I could get used to this American
custom of using first names. W I usually
call just my good friends by their first names.
Q What is the man complaining about?
21
3. W Oh, darling! Could you ask for leave next
week and accompany me to Hawaii? M Sorry, I
am really bus next week. I have one appointment
on Monday, another on Tuesday, another on
Wednesday, and two on Friday. And as you know,
patients treatment cannot be delayed. Q On
which weekday is the man free next week?
22
4. W Im really angry at John. He never listens
to me. M Take it easy, Ellen. Things will
work out. Q What does the man advise the
woman to do?
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5. W What would you do if you arent able to
make people understand you? M Difficult to
say, but I suppose I would use sign language.
Q What way would the man probably use?
24
6. M Jim said he and Ann cant understand what
the foreign teacher said. W Really? But Jack
and George said they can understand perfectly.
Q Who cant understand the foreign teacher?
25
7. W Having visited so many different countries,
you must be able to speak several different
languages. M I wish I could. But French and
English are the only ones that I have ever
learned to speak. Q What did the man say
about his knowledge of languages?
26
8. M But you promised me you wouldnt smoke
anymore. Maybe you dont care about your health,
but you might think of your children and me.
W Ill throw the pack away. Q What is
the probable relation between the two speakers?
27
9. W Your ability of concentration amazed me.
Didnt you hear me come in? M Are you
talking to me? Q What can be inferred about
the man from the conversation?
28
10. W Hello, Bill, have you got any plans for
this evening? M No, I dont think so.
Um, no, Im free. Q What is Bill
planning to do?
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Part 2 Listen and Answer

• Directions Listen to the recording and answer
  the following questions.

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Questions
1. Whats the difference between little girls
conversation and little boys?

• Little girls conversation is less definite and
  expresses more doubts, while little boys use
  conversation to establish status with their
  listeners.

2. In public conversations, who interrupt
other speakers more, men or women?
Men.
31

• 3. Whats mens view on private talking?

• For men, private talking is a way to explore the
  power structure of a relationship.

• 4. What kind of teaching approach will a woman
  probably adopt?

• She will probably take a sharing approach and
  encourage her student to join in.

32
At an early age, little girls conversation is
less definite and expresses more doubts, while
little boys use conversation to establish status
with their listeners. These differences
continue into adult life. In public
conversations, men talk more and interrupt other
speakers more. In private conversations, men and
women speak in equal amounts, although they say
things in a different style. For women, private
talking is a way to establish and test intimacy.
For men, private talking is a way to explore the
power structure of a relationship.
33
Teaching is a job which shows the differences
between mens and womens ways of talking. When a
man teaches a woman, he wants to show that he has
more knowledge, and hence more power in
conversation. He uses his language to show this.
When a woman teaches another woman, however, she
is more likely to take a sharing approach and to
encourage her student to join in. But it
doesnt suggest that women are naturally more
helpful. Actually, women feel they achieve power
by being able to help others.
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Part 3 Bridge the Cultural Gap
Almost all conflicts involve communication
problems, as both a cause and an effect.
(1)__________________ resulting from poor
communication, can easily cause a conflict or
make it worse. Further, once a conflict has
started, communication problems often develop
because people in conflict do not communicate
with each other as (2)____________, as openly,
and as accurately as they do when relationships
are not strained. Thus communication is
(3)__________ to most conflict situations.
Misunderstandings
frequently
central
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Part 3 Bridge the Cultural Gap
Communication involves at least two parties the
speaker and the listener. Sometimes there are
third parties in-between people who carry
messages from one person to another. Problems can
develop at all three of these __________.
sources
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Speakers often are not clear themselves
about what they mean, which almost _________ that
what they say will be unclear as well. Even when
people know what they mean, they often do not say
it as clearly as they should. They may hide their
true feelings or ideas intentionally or
______________. Either way, people often get
__________about other peoples messages.
__________________________ ______________________
____________________
ensures
unintentionally
confused
This is especially common
when people from different cultures.
try to communicate
37
Listeners also are sources of communication
problems. People often fail to listen carefully.
________________________________________
________________ Also, when people are in
conflict, they often concentrate more on what
they are going to say in response to their
opponents statement, rather than listening to
their opponents words with full attention. The
result, again, is misunderstandings.
They may assume they know what the other person
is saying or will say.
38
Third parties can make communication
better, or they can make it worse.
___________________ ______________________________
____________ _____________________________________
_____They can act as go-betweens, carrying
messages between people who cannot or will not
meet face-to-face. Unskilled third parties,
however, can make matters worse.
Skilled third parties
can help speakers clarify what they are saying,
and they can help listeners hear what is really
meant.
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In-class Reading
40
Pre-reading questions

• Do you agree that men and women seldom mean the
  same things even when they use the same words?
  Are there any examples in the article that may
  support your point of view?

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Sample

• Yes, I agree. Male speakers are more direct, and
  female speakers are more indirect or tactful. For
  instance, when a woman says, I feel like you
  never listen. she does not expect the word
  never to be taken literally. Using the word
  never is just a way of expressing the
  frustration she is feeling at the moment. It is
  not to be taken as if it were factual information

42
Pre-reading questions
Besides the gender difference, are there any
other differences that may cause people to speak
differently?
43
Sample
Educational background
Age (generation gap) ?, ?,?,?
Cultural differences (culture shock)
Social background
Regional dialects
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Structural information
Para.1 Para.3 Communication problems and
solutions between Martians and Venusians. Para.4
Para.9 Communication problems encountered
between men and women and suggestions to solve
them.
45
Sentence Study

• 1. So when communication problems emerged, they
  assumed it was just one of those expected
  misunderstandings and that with a little
  assistance they would surely understand each
  other. (Line 14)
• ??????????????,???????????????,??????????????that
  ???????

46

• So when communication problems emerged, they
  assumed it was just one of those expected
  misunderstandings and that with a little
  assistance they would surely understand each
  other.
• ????????????,??????????,??????????????,????
  ??,???????????

47
2. Ironically, they communicated well
because they spoke different languages.
????????, ????????? ????????????.
48
3. You can see how a literal translation of a
womans words could easily mislead a man who is
used to using speech as a means of conveying only
facts and information.
????,????????????????? ??????,?
??????????? ?????????.
49
Useful Expressions

go to sb. for assistance / help
Speech is a means of conveying information.
I dont feel heard.
to take his words lightly
They are on the verge of arguing.
50
Sentences for Translation

• 1. ????????,????????
• 2. ??????????????????????????????????????????
• 3. ????????????????????????????????,??????????????
  ??
• 4. ????????????????????????
• 5. ?????????????,?????????,???????????

51
Words in context
1 a. encounter many of the problems with
relationships (L1-2) b. The army is reported
to encounter considerable resistance in some
remote areas.
52
Words in context
2. a. pull out their phrase dictionaries
(L8-9) b. The boy pulled out his favorite
story-book from the bookshelf.
53
3. a. depend on the way the words were used
(L12) b. The organization depends on the
government for most of its income.
54
4. a. assume it was just one of those expected
misunderstandings (L14-15) b. You will
assume you new responsibilities tomorrow.
55
5. a. I feel like you never listen. (L19-20)
b. I dont feel like working now I feel like
having a relaxation first.
56
6. a. tend to exaggerate the facts a little bit
for effect (L23-24) b. Dont pay any
attention to him hes only doing it for
effect.
57
7. a. use speech as a means of conveying only
facts and information (L42-43) b. Our
governments anger was conveyed to their
ambassador.
58
8. a. lead to an argument (L43) b. This
policy will lead to disaster in future.
59
9. a. take the womans complaint lightly
(L47-48) b. He took the whole situation
lightly.
60
10. a. on the verge of arguing (L53) b.
These scientists are on the verge of a major
breakthrough.
61
Ex. 5 Translation
1. The more difficulties we encounter 2. react to
each other in an unsupportive manner 3. take
literally what others have said 4. We cant
assume the suspects to be guilty 5. pausing for a
while for effect
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Ex. 5 Translation
6. otherwise your excessively high blood pressure
may lead to heart attack 7. more than a means of
conveying information 8. tends to exaggerate
facts 9. the development of things depends on the
internal forces 10. was on the verge of bursting
into tears
63
Summary of Speaking Different Languages
Martians and Venusians speak different languages,
but they can communicate well because they knew
that the (1) ______________________ is (2) ______
to their differences so that they could go for a
dictionary or a translator for help. The
relationship between men and women is almost the
same. Women tend to (3) _______________ the facts
a little bit (4) ______________ but men (5)
_______________ take these expressions (6)
_____________ because men would like to use
speech as means of (7) _______________ facts and
information. Therefore, when there is (8)
_______________ it is better for men and women to
rethink and translate they have heard.
misunderstanding
due
exaggerate
for effect
mistakenly
literally
conveying
argument
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After-class reading passage I Five Words at a
Time
65

• Questions
• Para 1
• How did Yulan feel when she was in the
  over-crowded ESL Class?
• Para 2
• 2) Why did Taiqi work in a Chinese restaurant?

66
Questions Para 3 3) What was troubling
Yulan? Para 4--5 4) Description of Taiqi.
(appearance and character) 5) Whats the main
idea of the passage?
67
After-class reading passage I

• Words in Context
• 1. a. for fear of not understanding what people
  were saying (L4-5)
• b. She left an hour early for fear of missing
  her train.

68

• 2. a. She never neglected us because of her
  fatigue. (L10)
• b. The animals were thin and ill because the
  farmer had neglected them.

69

• 3. a. burst into tears I had held back for so
  long (L14)
• b. Jim managed to hold back his anger and
  avoid a fight.

70

• 4. a. I saw my mother in a different light.
  (L19-20)
• b. What he has done made everyone think of
  him in a different light.

71

• 5. a. distinguish her from others (L27-28)
• b. There are some features that distinguish
  spoken English form written English.

72

• Ex. 5
• 1. for fear of being recognized
• 2. It was her unfamiliarity with the surroundings
  that
• 3. tried to hold back his grief
• 4. One material can be distinguished from another
• 5. he has presented the matter in a different
  light

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Summary of Five New Words at a Time

• When the writers family first
  (1)_______ to America, she met a problem of
  understanding others and be understood by others.
  Her mother (2)___________ the problem and then
  they worked together to learn English. The
  (3)___________ and (4)_________________ her
  mother (5) ______________ encouraged her a lot
  and helped her (6)__________ the language
  difficulty. The writer is full of (7)___________
  and (8)__________ for her mother.

moved
recognized
confidence
determination
demonstrated
overcome
admiration
gratitude
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After-class reading passage II Misunderstandings
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After-class Reading Passage II

• Words in Context
• 1. a. head straight for the restroom (L2)
• b. Youre heading for trouble if you drive
  after drinking.

76

• 2. a. pull over to the side of the highway (L11)
• b. The policemen ordered the speeding
  motorist to pull over.

77

• 3. a. wonder what in the world he meant (L36)
• b. How in the world did they manage? I never
  in the world would have guessed.

78

• 4. a. not feel like laughing (L48)
• b. When I realized what a stupid mistake I
  had made, I fell like a fool.

79

• 5. a. But even that misunderstanding turned out
  all right in the end. (L48-49)
• b. To our surprise the stranger turned out to
  be an old friend of my mothers.

80

• Ex. 5
• 1. headed for the exit as quickly as possible
• 2. resulted in the highways being closed
• 3. what in the world he meant to say
• 4. signaled the driver to pull it over
• 5. did not turn out as I had expected

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Summary of Misunderstandings
owning to

• Misunderstandings often take place
  (1)___________ the similar sound of English
  language. This passage presents us two stories of
  such (2)_______. One was that the word bum was
  passed from one to another, becoming bomb when
  it came to the driver, which (3)________ a series
  of (4)_______________ stop, search by the police,
  and, (5)_____, etc. Another example is a
  passenger who flied to the wrong (6)____________
  by mistaking Oakland for Auckland. In daily life
  there are some other (7)_______ serious mistakes.
  The misunderstanding is very (8)__________, with
  native speakers in English-speaking countries,
  especially with foreigners.

cases
led to
unnecessary
jam
destination
less
common
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Key to section 6

• Ex.1
• 1. B 2. A 3. D 4. B 5. D
• 6. A 7. C 8. C 9. A 10. B
• 11. C 12. D 13. A 14. B 15. C
• 16. B 17. A 18. A 19. B 20. D
• 21. C 22. B 23. A 24. C 25. D
• 26. C 27. A 28. B 29. B 30. A

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• Ex.2
• A 2. C 3. B 4. C 5. B
• 6. D 7. C 8. B 9. B 10. C
• Ex.3
• C 2. A 3. B 4. D 5. C
• 6. D 7. A 8. A 9. B 10. C

84

• Ex.4
• 1. They discuss business strategy with one
  another, but not feelings.
• 2. Because opening up makes you vulnerable.
• 3. Because failures are seen as more human.
• 4. Women are reaching a consensus, men making a
  pragmatic decision.
• 5. It may lead to misunderstandings or
  disagreement.

85

• Ex.5
• 1. C 2. A 3. A 4. C 5. D
• 6. B 7. B 8. C 9. A 10. C
• 11. C 12. D 13. B 14. A 15. D
• 16. D 17. A 18. B 19. C 20. C

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Further Development
87
People from different countries may have
different habits to express themselves. Sometimes
they misunderstand each other because of their
different culture or customs. Please give an
example to illustrate this point and try to put
forward some suggestions to clear up the
misunderstandings between them.
88

• Make a short dialog according to the directions
  in p.61.
• According to the directions in p. 63, revise a
  letter for James.

89
Directions Write a composition on the topic How
to Avoid Misunderstandings. Your composition
should be no less than 120 words according to the
outline given below in Chinese
1. ???????????? 2. ?????????? 3.
????,???????????? ?,???????
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How to Avoid Misunderstandings?
Misunderstandings may frequently occur in
our everyday life. For example, there is a
misunderstanding when people use the same words
but do not mean the same things. Misunderstanding
may also arise between people who behave
differently. Misunderstanding each other may
cause a lot of trouble in our daily life. Many a
quarrel has come about through misunderstanding.
Generation gaps appear because of
misunderstandings. A serious misunderstanding
damage friendship. When a couple misunderstand
each other badly, marriage is likely to break up.
Misunderstanding can lead to great problems for
both teachers and students. Then how can we clear
up misunderstandings?
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Misunderstandings can be avoided in many
ways. Here are some tips. To begin with, dont
use ambiguous (????) words. Speak plainly,
clearly and directly. Next, stress your important
points. Make sure that others know what your
major concerns are. Moreover, when you do not
understand others fully, dont feel ashamed to
ask, Pardon, I didnt catch your meaning. or
Im
sorry. Would you please explain it again?
Finally, be aware of cultural differences. It is
always smart to talk about misunderstandings and
respect mutual (???) differences.
92
Though it is impossible to avoid all
misunderstandings, if you keep all the tips above
in mind, you will, to the greatest extent, avoid
many potential
misunderstandings and understand each other
better. Without misunderstandings among people,
the world will be a better one, and everyone can
enjoy a harmonious (???) and happy life.
93
see you