Apalling

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Apalling

• 2000 AS UE
• Proofreading

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81. Chek Keng was used to be a remote, beautiful
and 82. tranquil bay in Sai Kung, and providing
an excellent83. natural retreat for city dweller
in Hong Kong. Over

• In the past, Chek Keng was a beautiful bay.
• Later in the paragraph, we will learn that it
  isnt anymore because it is now polluted.
• Delete was.

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81. Chek Keng was used to be a remote, beautiful
and 82. tranquil bay in Sai Kung, and providing
an excellent83. natural retreat for city dweller
in Hong Kong. Over

• If we keep the conjunction and, providing
  becomes the second verb in the sentence. Ex.
  Tom lived in America and enjoyed it.
• used to be means that we are talking about a
  situation in the past.
• Replace providing with provided.
• You can also delete a word to turn the second
  part of the sentence into an adjective phrase.
  Ex. I saw a man standing across the road.
• Delete and.

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81. Chek Keng was used to be a remote, beautiful
and 82. tranquil bay in Sai Kung, and providing
an excellent83. natural retreat for city dweller
in Hong Kong. Over

• A city dweller is a person who lives in a city.
• Obviously, more than one city dweller has been to
  Chek Keng.
• Replace dweller with dwellers.

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Over84. the past few years, however, it has
become heavily pollute.

• pollute is a verb.
• We are describing the present state of Chek Keng
  so we need an adjective.
• Replace pollute with polluted.

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85. A lot of plastic bags and other unsightly
rubbish86. have dumped on the shore. There is a
87. disgusting smell in the bay caused the
refuse.

• No errors.

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85. A lot of plastic bags and other unsightly
rubbish86. have dumped on the shore. There is
a87. disgusting smell in the bay caused the
refuse.

• Bags and rubbish cannot dump themselves.
• Change to the passive voice have been dumped.

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85. A lot of plastic bags and other unsightly
rubbish86. have dumped on the shore. There is
a87. disgusting smell in the bay caused the
refuse.

• Note The pronunciation of the verb refuse (say
  no) and the noun refuse (rubbish) are
  different.
• Bad smells do not cause refuse. Refuse causes
  bad smells.
• We can imagine the words which is before the
  verb caused.
• A preposition needs to be added.
• Add by after caused.

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88. Chek Keng illustrates the multitude of
problem89. facing our natural environment, which
being ruinedby greed and ignorance.

• Multitude means many.
• Replace problem with problems.

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88. Chek Keng illustrates the multitude of
problem89. facing our natural environment, which
being ruinedby greed and ignorance.

• Obviously, the verb ruined should be in the
  passive voice, but the verb isnt complete here.
• What tense is being used?
• Present continuous.
• Add is which is being ruined.

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which (is) being ruined90. by greed and
ignorance. The only responds we91. have see over
the years from the HK Government92. has been
empty words and breaking promises.

• Which sounds better? The only sing/song
• We need a noun and responds is a verb.
• Replace responds with response.
• Note the similar pronunciation of the two words.

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which (is) being ruined90. by greed and
ignorance. The only responds we91. have see over
the years from the HK Government92. has been
empty words and breaking promises.

• Obviously, have see doesnt sound right.
• We are using see in the present perfect.
• What is the past participle of see?
• Replace see with seen.

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which (is) being ruined90. by greed and
ignorance. The only responds we91. have see over
the years from the HK Government92. has been
empty words and breaking promises.

• breaking is being used to describe which kind
  of promises are being made.
• However, promises cannot break themselves.
• Replace breaking with broken.

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93. Chek Keng is die and, unless prompt action is
taken to 94. clear up the mess, it will beyond
saving. If we dont95. act now, our remaining
areas of unspoilt land end up96. being
completely and unnecessarily destructed.

• The rest of the sentence tells us that Chek Keng
  is not completely dead yet.
• From the context, we can assume that it is in the
  process of dying.
• Use the present continuous.
• Replace die with dying.

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93. Chek Keng is die and, unless prompt action is
taken to 94. clear up the mess, it will beyond
saving. If we dont95. act now, our remaining
areas of unspoilt land end up96. being
completely and unnecessarily destructed.

• will beyond saving doesnt sound right.
• beyond saving is a description of how it will
  be in the future.
• Add be it will be beyond saving.

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93. Chek Keng is die and, unless prompt action is
taken to 94. clear up the mess, it will beyond
saving. If we dont95. act now, our remaining
areas of unspoilt land end up96. being
completely and unnecessarily destructed.

• end up is a phrasal verb meaning to come to be
  in a particular situation.
• We are talking about a future potential
  situation.
• Add will unspoilt land will end up.

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93. Chek Keng is die and, unless prompt action is
taken to 94. clear up the mess, it will beyond
saving. If we dont95. act now, our remaining
areas of unspoilt land end up96. being
completely and unnecessarily destructed.

• Destructed means to destroy purposely, and it
  is usually used to describe the destruction of
  rockets.
• Replace destructed with destroyed.

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97. Hong Kong people seem to unaware that they
are98. wasting one of their best resource the
environment.

• Unaware is an adjective.
• Seem to cannot be followed by an adjective. You
  wouldnt say seem to strong.
• Add be HK people seem to be unaware.

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97. Hong Kong people seem to unaware that they
are98. wasting one of their best resource the
environment.

• The use of one of indicates that the
  environment is one of many
• Replace resource with resources.