The 7 Stages of Marriage - PowerPoint PPT Presentation

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The 7 Stages of Marriage

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Cultivate love. What difference does a Stage make? ... 3 Learn your Love Languages. Mission 4 Build ... Mission 4: De-Stress and Make Love Again. REUNION ... – PowerPoint PPT presentation

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Title: The 7 Stages of Marriage


1
The 7 Stages of Marriage
  • Presented by Rita DeMaria, Ph.D.
  • Council for Relationships
  • July 3, 2008
  • Smart Marriages Happy Families
  • San Francisco, CA

2
The Timeline of MarriageEmbrace Change
  • Every marriage is unique.
  • Change never, ever stops.
  • Incredible, inevitable journey
  • Live your stage.
  • Cultivate love

3
What difference does a Stage make?
  • Life experience is dynamic, changing and
    dimensional
  • Life cycle development is predictable
  • Life cycle development is individual,
    interactional, and intergenerational
  • Life cycle development is marked by the passing
    of time

4
What is unique about the 7 Stages?
  • Developmental issues and tasks have been
    identified
  • Normative events are described
  • Practical exercises and activities useful in
    educational workshops and counseling practice

5
The Benefit of Knowing the 7 Stages
  • Provides a roadmap for today and tomorrow
  • Normalizes the experiences of marriage
  • Knowing the missions for the stages provides
    focus

6
Marriage Today
  • Marriage is a value
  • What the Stats tell us
  • The Reader's Digest Survey
  • The Benefits of Marriage

7
Readers Digest SurveyThe Survey Says..
  • Marriage Isnt Broken
  • Its Really About Trust
  • Laughter is More Important than Sex
  • Guys Get Gushy About Marriage, Too
  • Challenges Make Us Stronger

8
7 Stages at a Glance
  • Passion
  • Realization
  • Rebellion
  • Cooperation
  • Reunion
  • Explosion
  • Completion

9
Measuring Your MarriageLife Long Journey
  • Stages dont have start times or ending dates.
  • Two stages can overlap.
  • You can repeat or revisit an earlier stage.
  • You can use the lessons of an earlier stage to
    enhance your current stage.

10
PASSION
  • The Love Cocktail Know the essential ingredients

11
The Missions
  • Mission 1 Savor the Passion
  • Mission 2 Forge a Sense of We
  • Mission 3 Learn your Love Languages
  • Mission 4 Build Emotional Intimacy
  • Mission 5 Expand Your Sexual Vocabulary

12
REALIZATION
  • The rose-colored glasses come off now
    differentiation begins

13
The Missions
  • Mission 1 Understand your Expectations
  • Mission 2 Open, Honest Talking
  • Mission 3 Learn Empathetic Listening
  • Mission 4 Be Friends
  • Mission 5 Split Household Chores Fairly
  • Mission 6 Become a Money Team

14
REBELLION
  • Me, Me, Me!
  • Growth through conflict - from control
  • to compromise....
  • on to negotiation

15
The Missions
  • Mission 1 Turn Power Struggles into Acceptance
  • Mission 2 Move from Conflict to
    Problem- Solving
  • Mission 3 Set and Pursue Healthy Personal Goals
  • Mission 4 Renew Your Spirituality
  • Mission 5 Recover from Infidelities
  • Mission 6 Forgive Your Spouse and Yourself

16
COOPERATION
  • Lots to do work, family, friends, future
    planning
  • Not enough time
  • Not enough money
  • Not enough sexual intimacy

17
The Missions
  • Mission 1 Let Parenthood Strengthen Your
    Marriage
  • Mission 2 Settle Conflicts and Connect as
    Friends
  • Mission 3 Invite Romance Back into Your
    Marriage
  • Mission 4 De-Stress and Make Love Again

18
REUNION
  • The First Stage of the Rest of Your Marriage
    strengthening mutuality

19
The Missions
  • Mission 1 Shift Your Focus Back to Your
    Marriage
  • Mission 2 Get off Autopilot
  • Mission 3 Welcome Boomerang Kids Without
    Neglecting Your Marriage
  • Mission 4 Use Your Marriage to Create Good
    Health

20
EXPLOSION
  • Random Crises
  • Health -physical/emotional
  • Work
  • Family
  • Trauma

21
  • Caring for Aging Parents
  • Mission 1 Make Care giving a Team Effort
  • Mission 2 Enjoy Your Marriage

22
  • Depression
  • Mission 1 Fight the Depression
  • Mission 2 Protect Your Marriage and Yourself

23
  • Job Loss
  • Mission 1 Set a New Budget and New Priorities
  • Mission 2 Support Each Other

24
  • Weight Gain
  • Mission 1 Feel Good about Your Body
  • Mission 2 Take care of your health and reduce
    your spouses anxiety

25
COMPLETION
  • Recreating and Enjoying Life
  • Continuity and Loss

26
The Missions
  • Mission 1 Keep Your Marriage Growing
  • Mission 2 Play And Be in the Moment
  • Mission 3 Share a New Sense of Meaning and
    Purpose
  • Mission 4 Reorganize Your Time, Your Territory,
    Your Tasks

27
Applications for Workshops
28
Applications in Counseling Couples
29
Thank you!
  • Rita DeMaria, Ph.D.
  • 215-628-2450
  • marriagedoctor_at_aol.com
  • www.marriagedoctor.com
  • Note The actual presentation PPT presentation
    may differ from the handout copy. Participants
    may contact Rita DeMaria for an updated handout.
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