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Authentic Relationships

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Title: Authentic Relationships


1
Authentic Relationships
Chapters 7 8
Adapted from
  • discover the lost art of One Anothering

By Wayne Jacobsen and Clay Jacobsen
2
Part 3 - Sharing the Journey
  • Having a friend to share your journey in
    uncertain moments and dark stretches will
    multiply your wisdom and courage greatly. We are
    not asked to go it alone but to enjoy the
    resources of others God has placed around us.

3
Part 3 - Sharing the JourneyChapter 7 -
Lightening the Load
  • NIV Galatians 513b serve one another

NIV Galatians 62 Carry each other's burdens
NIV 1 Thessalonians 511 build each other up
I dont know what your destiny will be, but one
thing I know the only ones among you who will be
really happy are those who will have sought and
found to serve. Albert Schweitzer
4
Serve One Another
  • Love will cause us to put the needs of others
    above our own and to do so joyfully
  • Finding ways to practically help others face the
    demands of life is a significant means of
    lightening their loads
  • Often we say, If theres anything I can do to
    help, dont hesitate to call.
  • However, the last thing on somebodys mind during
    a crisis is an organized list of what others can
    do
  • Their usual response is a smile and thank you,
    but nothing gets done to lighten their burden

5
Serve One Another (cont.)
  • When a friend is in trouble, dont annoy him by
    asking if there is anything you can do. Think up
    something appropriate and do it.
  • E.W. Howe
  • Mow their yard
  • Bring them a meal
  • Pick up their children from school (security
    issues may prevent this)
  • Leave them an anonymous gift
  • Wash their cars

6
Serving from a Heart of Love
  • Serving one another isnt always easy
  • Again, we can not meet every need that crosses
    our path as that would be an overwhelming burden
  • Service to others is not to be a weighty
    obligation but rather a natural result of walking
    in the Spirit
  • Serving those we know will happen more naturally
  • However, an act of service to a stranger may
    start a new relationship. One that might open a
    life to Gods love

7
Serving from a Heart of Love (cont.)
  • Whats important is that we let love motivate us
    as the Spirit makes us aware of opportunities to
    serve
  • As we keep our eyes open for the opportunities
    the Lord brings our way, we will know where we
    can serve others and do so in love
  • Serving out of obedience alone is slavery
  • Serving with love is a joy

8
Carry Each Others Burdens
  • Some things are just too awkward to carry alone
  • This fallen world is full of ups and downs,
    trials, and tribulations for everybody
  • God does not intend for us to go through it alone
  • We do not have to have the right words or
    right prayer to make a difference
  • People in difficult straits rarely need someone
    that can fix their problem
  • They need someone who will walk with them through
    it

9
Build Each Other Up
  • If we focus only on helping one another through
    the difficult moments, we soon will be consumed
    with problems and worn out trying to address them
    all
  • Building up or edifying one another is simply
    a way of putting our focus back on Jesus
  • It is not designed to fix a particular problem
    but to nourish others in the life of Jesus
  • It helps us grow closer to Him and look beyond
    any current crisis to give attention to spiritual
    growth that will yield great rewards in days
    ahead
  • It is to be the prime objective when believers
    meet

10
Build Each Other Up (cont.)
  • Nourishing one anothers spiritual life is simply
    serving spiritual food and drink to those that
    cross our paths
  • It is giving their spiritual battery a jump start!

11
Build Each Other Up (cont.)
  • Build each other up by sharing
  • What God is teaching you and doing in your life
  • What you are learning about Gods nature that
    leaves you in awe of Him
  • What you have been reading in Scripture that has
    spoken to your heart
  • How God has made His love know to you or through
    you to someone else

12
Build Each Other Up (cont.)
  • Your sharing will often result in their sharing
  • Your own journey will then be enriched
  • The depth of fellowship will grow
  • This kind of mutual sharing is the bread and
    butter of of Body Life
  • This may not always provide immediately
    noticeable help but will bear fruit in them for
    years to come
  • Therefore, we must always remember to share
    practical things, too

13
Serving one another (Galatians 513)
Carrying one anothers burdens (Galatians
62) Building up one another (1 Thessalonians
511) Encouraging one another daily (Hebrews
313) Comforting one another (1 Thessalonians
418) Stimulating one another to love and good
deeds (Heb1024) Instructing one another (Romans
1514) Admonishing one another (Colossians
316) Praying for one another (James
516) Confessing your sins to one another (James
516) Being of the same mind toward one another
(Romans 1216) Submitting to one another
(Ephesians 521)
14
Discussion Questions
  • Turn to pages 86, 87

15
Chapter 8 - Cheerleading
  • NIV Hebrews 313a Encourage one another daily

NAU 1 Thessalonians 418 Comfort one
another NAU Hebrews 1024 Stimulate one another
to love and good deeds There is nothing better
that the encouragement of a good
friend. Katharine Butler Hathaway
16
Encourage One Another Daily
  • We encourage other by saying or doing things that
    make God more visible to them
  • We can encourage others by
  • e-mailing a card or letter
  • sending a card or letter
  • giving a gift
  • calling on the phone
  • visiting them personally

17
Encourage One Another Daily (cont.)
  • The journey to Christ-likeness is often
    difficult, sometimes painful, and almost always
    filled with distractions
  • Being encouraged daily is not a luxury - it is a
    necessity
  • The encouragement from our corporate gatherings
    is not enough
  • We need further encouragement through personal
    relationships
  • We need to weave encouragement into the fabric of
    our lives and our interactions with others

18
Encourage One Another Daily (cont.)
  • A question we need to ask ourselves every day is
    -
  • Whom can I encourage today?
  • When you know you are going to spend some time
    with someone, ask God what you might say or do
    that would help that person experience a touch of
    Gods grace

19
Encourage One Another Daily (cont.)
  • Encouragement is not advice, platitudes, or empty
    words
  • For example, when someone is grieving a death
    saying, Well we know shes in a better place
    now or I know how you feel provides little
    comfort
  • Godly encouragement says, I am sorry this
    happened. This must be really hard. Let me take
    care of the kids this afternoon. Ill be right
    there

20
Comfort One Another
  • This is not the comfort of someone with his or
    her arm around a troubled friend saying There,
    there! Everything will be okay.
  • The original word comfort could be also
    translated as to enable
  • Godly comfort gets our eyes off of our efforts
    and our limited resources and puts them back on
    God
  • Godly comfort restores our vision of what should
    be and could be if we would just trust God
  • Godly comfort restores our hope

21
Comfort One Another (cont.)
  • NKJ 1 Thessalonians 413 But I do not want you to
    be ignorant, brethren, concerning those who have
    fallen asleep, lest you sorrow as others who have
    no hope.

14 For if we believe that Jesus died and rose
again, even so God will bring with Him those who
sleep in Jesus. 15 For this we say to you by
the word of the Lord, that we who are alive and
remain until the coming of the Lord will by no
means precede those who are asleep.
22
Comfort One Another (cont.)
  • 16 For the Lord Himself will descend from heaven
    with a shout, with the voice of an archangel, and
    with the trumpet of God. And the dead in Christ
    will rise first.

17 Then we who are alive and remain shall be
caught up together with them in the clouds to
meet the Lord in the air. And thus we shall
always be with the Lord. 18 Therefore comfort
one another with these words.
23
Comfort One Another (cont.)
  • Traveling at the speed of light, in a vacuum 186,
    282 miles per second, it would require the
    following amount of time to reach these heavenly
    bodies
  • Moon 1.3 seconds
  • Sun 8 minutes 20 seconds (21 years by plane,
    200 years by car)
  • Pluto 5.33 hours
  • Proxima Centauri (nearest star after Sun) 4.3
    years (51 billion years by plane)
  • Andromeda Galaxy (nearest galaxy) 2.31 Million
    Years
  • Edge of Universe 13.2 Billion Years

24
Comfort One Another (cont.)
  • If the Sun were 3 inches in diameter then the
    following would be the scaled diameter, distance
  • Earth 0.02749 inches, 26.94 feet
  • Proxima Centauri 1377.59 miles
  • Andromeda Galaxy 734,300,167.6 miles
  • 0.01 inches is about the size of a grain of sand
  • 0.1 inches is the thickness of a pencil point

25
Comfort One Another (cont.)
  • NKJ Isaiah 4012 Who has measured the waters in
    the hollow of His hand, Measured heaven with a
    span And calculated the dust of the earth in a
    measure? Weighed the mountains in scales And the
    hills in a balance?

13 Who has directed the Spirit of the LORD, Or as
His counselor has taught Him? 14 With whom did
He take counsel, and who instructed Him, And
taught Him in the path of justice? Who taught Him
knowledge, And showed Him the way of
understanding? 15 Behold, the nations are as a
drop in a bucket, And are counted as the small
dust on the scales Look, He lifts up the isles
as a very little thing.
26
Comfort One Another (cont.)
  • The maker of the universe must necessarily be
    greater than the universe He made
  • Do you think God is great enough to handle your
    problems?
  • Whatever you focus on appears bigger to you
  • God or Satan
  • Promises or Problems
  • Word or World
  • NKJ Psalm 343 Oh, magnify the LORD with me, And
    let us exalt His name together.
  • Magnify (make appear larger) the Lord by praise
    (thanking Him for who He is)!

27
Stimulate One Another to Love and Good Deeds
  • Telling people what they should be doing does
    more to discourage than it does to invite them
    into a greater revelation of Gods grace
  • Stimulating others to love and good deeds draws
    the best out of others by helping them see Gods
    purpose in their lives
  • Our demeanor, thoughts, simple affection can
    rescue people from their own anger, ego, or
    selfishness and free them to live on a higher
    plane in the life of Jesus
  • Remember to be obedient to the gentle nudging of
    the Holy Spirit asking you to speak to others

28
Kingdom Cheers
  • We can cheer one another along by
  • Honestly sharing the times when we came to the
    end of our rope and found that God was doing even
    greater things than we could imagine
  • Remind them of how Scripture speaks to their
    circumstances
  • Tell people how much they much they have touched
    our lives (do not wait until their funeral!)

29
Kingdom Cheers (cont.)
  • You do not have to agree with everything a person
    believes or does to encourage them to draw close
    to Jesus
  • When people are struggling, they are usually not
    in the mood to respond to criticism - even if it
    is constructive
  • There is a time and place for corrective words
    but it is not when people are struggling
  • Pointing them to Jesus will most help them grow
    closer to Him
  • Only Jesus knows how to make adjustments without
    increasing their pain

30
The Cheer that does not Work
  • One of the most common statements that people use
    to encourage one another is, You just need to
    trust God more!
  • This rarely works because trust only grows as our
    security in Gods love for us grows
  • Trust is not something we can increase on demand
  • Stimulating people to love and good deeds does
    not happen by picking at their failures or by
    pushing them to try harder
  • People are stimulated by helping them draw closer
    to Jesus!

31
The Cheer that does not Work (cont.)
  • NKJ Romans 141 Receive one who is weak in the
    faith, but not to disputes over doubtful things.
  • NKJ Romans 1215 Rejoice with those who rejoice,
    and weep with those who weep.
  • NKJ 1 Corinthians 1226 And if one member
    suffers, all the members suffer with it or if
    one member is honored, all the members rejoice
    with it.
  • Dont tell them what they are doing wrong, or try
    harder when they are already doing their best
  • Show them how to see God in the midst of their
    pain

32
Becoming More Like Jesus
  • Gods priority for you may not be the best
    career path, but the best way for God to make you
    more like Jesus
  • Clay Jacobsen
  • Do you really want the perfect job if it does
    not help transform you more into the image of
    Christ?
  • Do not worry about having taken the wrong path or
    made the wrong decision along the way
  • This type of worry shows that we are trusting in
    our own performance instead of a God that is
    bigger than our mistakes! What kind of trust is
    that?

33
Becoming More Like Jesus (cont.)
  • Take your eyes off of your career frustrations
    and put them on Gods purpose for your life
  • NKJ Ezekiel 144 "Therefore speak to them, and
    say to them, 'Thus says the Lord GOD "Everyone
    of the house of Israel who sets up his idols in
    his heart, and puts before him what causes him to
    stumble into iniquity, and then comes to the
    prophet, I the LORD will answer him who comes,
    according to the multitude of his idols,
  • NKJ Colossians 35 Therefore put to death your
    members which are on the earth fornication,
    uncleanness, passion, evil desire, and
    covetousness, which is idolatry.

34
Becoming More Like Jesus (cont.)
  • If we come before God with a heart full of our
    desires (idols) then we will be deceived into
    thinking our will is Gods will
  • NAU Ezekiel 145 in order to lay hold of the
    hearts of the house of Israel who are estranged
    from Me
  • God does this so that we will grow weary of our
    ways and realize that surrendering control of our
    lives to Him is the only option that leads to
    life
  • Remember Balaam who wanted profit more than to
    obey God? (Numbers Chapter 22)

35
Becoming More Like Jesus (cont.)
  • God gave him permission to go with Balak (his
    will) even though judgment awaited in the form of
    an Angel blocking his path
  • NKJ Acts 1322b 'I have found David the son of
    Jesse, a man after My own heart, who will do all
    My will.'
  • We must have our hearts set on doing all of Gods
    will
  • Partial obedience is not obedience at all!

36
Becoming More Like Jesus (cont.)
  • NKJ Luke 175 And the apostles said to the Lord,
    "Increase our faith."
  • 6 So the Lord said, "If you have faith as a
    mustard seed, you can say to this mulberry tree,
    'Be pulled up by the roots and be planted in the
    sea,' and it would obey you.
  • 7 "And which of you, having a servant plowing or
    tending sheep, will say to him when he has come
    in from the field, 'Come at once and sit down to
    eat'?
  • 8 "But will he not rather say to him, 'Prepare
    something for my supper, and gird yourself and
    serve me till I have eaten and drunk, and
    afterward you will eat and drink'?
  • The servants job was to put food on the masters
    plate which began in the field but was completed
    in the dining room
  • The message here is that our faith will grow when
    we are obedient all the way to task completion

37
Becoming More Like Jesus (cont.)
  • NKJ Psalm 374 Delight yourself also in the LORD,
    And He shall give you the desires of your heart.
  • NKJ John 157 "If you abide in Me, and My words
    abide in you, you will ask what you desire, and
    it shall be done for you.
  • We must spend time with God with a neutral
    (submitted) heart seeking His will for lives
  • Then God will put His desires in our hearts and
    cause them to come to pass as we trust (keep our
    eyes on) Him
  • So what is Gods primary purpose for our life?

38
Becoming More Like Jesus (cont.)
  • NKJ Romans 828 And we know that all things work
    together for good
  • to those who love God,
  • to those who are the called according to His
    purpose.
  • If you are head over heels in love with God
    then you will trust Him to always do what is best
    no matter what the circumstances
  • The winds and waves will not distract, for you
    are are not walking on them, but rather on the
    C
  • That is the C-o-m-e WORD as you keep your eyes
    fixed on Jesus whom you trust with all your heart!

39
Becoming More Like Jesus (cont.)
  • NKJ Romans 829 For whom He foreknew, He also
    predestined to be conformed to the image of His
    Son, that He might be the firstborn among many
    brethren.
  • We are called according to one major purpose
  • to be conformed to the image of Jesus!
  • Trusting God to cause everything to conform you
    to Jesus will result in everything working to
    your good
  • The good that is being referred to is the
    hastening of the process of Christ conformation
    in our lives!

40
Serving one another (Galatians 513)
Carrying one anothers burdens (Galatians
62) Building up one another (1 Thessalonians
511) Encouraging one another daily (Hebrews
313) Comforting one another (1 Thessalonians
418) Stimulating one another to love and good
deeds (Heb1024) Instructing one another (Romans
1514) Admonishing one another (Colossians
316) Praying for one another (James
516) Confessing your sins to one another (James
516) Being of the same mind toward one another
(Romans 1216) Submitting to one another
(Ephesians 521)
41
Homework
  • Read Part 3, Chapter 9
  • Pooling our Wisdom
  • Meet next week Wednesday at 600 PM in Room A124
  • Pray the Word Daily

42
Pray the Word(Philippians 310, 11 Colossians
127,28)
  • Heavenly Father cause me to know Jesus and the
    power of His resurrection, and the fellowship of
    His sufferings, being conformed to His death to
    self, if, by any means, I may attain to the
    resurrection from the dead. So that the hope of
    Glory, Christ in me, will be revealed to the lost
    world through your causing me to live perfect in
    Christ Jesus. So that He might be honored and You
    glorified by the power of the Holy Spirit.

43
Discussion Questions
  • Turn to page 99
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