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Title: Composition, Prose, and Rhetoric: Examples of Strong Writing from MGT 360


1
Composition, Prose, and RhetoricExamples of
Strong Writing from MGT 360
  • Wayne Smith, Ph.D.
  • Department of Management
  • CSU Northridge
  • ws_at_csun.edu

2
Superior, Contemporary Writing
  • Employ higher-order writing strategies
  • Always elevate your writing (throughout this
    class and beyond)
  • All of the following examples are from my
    outstanding students
  • Technical Composition
  • Introductory Sentences, Thesis Statements, Topic
    sentences, Transition sentences, Contrasts,
    Emphases, Transition words
  • Artful Prose
  • Short Sentences, Noun Phrases, Verb Phrases,
    Adjectives and Adverbs, Prepositions,
    Conjunctions and Coordination, Dependent Clauses,
    Sentence Openers and Inversion, Branching
    Sentences, Appositives, Interrogatories,
    Exclamatories, Imperatives, Parallelism, Cohesion
  • Sentence Variety Length, Types, Passive
    constructions, Originality, Rhythm
  • Persuasive Rhetoric
  • Linkages to Domain/Subject Matter, Linkages to
    General Education
  • Quotes, Analogies, Metaphors, Similes,
    Topic/Content order, Arguments
  • Figurative Language

3
Exemplars Composition Introductory Sentences
  • A startling statistic or an unusual fact
  • Chuck E. Cheese isa corporation that provides
    employment to much older people with limited
    English.
  • A vivid example
  • He routinely yells at his employees and
    threatens to cut our hours if we dont work
    harder.
  • A description or an image
  • In my experience, a manager can change the
    attitudes of many employees by having a certain
    feature that they carry with them at all times.
    This feature is always displayed on a managers
    face and can be felt when a manager is motivating
    the employees.
  • I have been working there for over a year, and I
    must admit that I really love what I do.
  • A paradoxical statement
  • Bill seemed to be aware that he didnt obtain
    his position purely through merit, but he was not
    an incompetent supervisor.

4
Exemplars Composition Introductory Sentences
  • A quotation or a bit of dialogue
  • The phrase, the customer is always right is
    highly used and expected by the customers.
  • A question
  • What is a company with no policy?
  • An analogy
  • Working for a mother as a babysitter can be just
    as challenging as being an employer working for a
    manager with equal responsibilities of dealing
    with customers as well as having precise time
    management skills.
  • An anecdote
  • Today, a friend and coworker of mine was let go
    from my job. He was always an ideas person and I
    was the one doing much of the executing.

5
Exemplars Composition Thesis Statements
  • It seems that throughout the three years that
    Tariq has been working for TRUECar, he has not
    developed himself and has not taken any
    leadership role in his department.
  • Customer service is a problem faced by any
    service industry and this issue is a priority for
    restaurants because its a big part of the
    restaurant experience for the customer.
  • A thesis statement generally appears in the
    introductory or opening paragraph.
  • A thesis statement
  • requires further proof or development (not a fact
    or description),
  • is an answer to a question (not the question
    itself),
  • is neither too broad (not specific enough) nor
    too narrow (cant generalize), and
  • should be sharply focused (avoiding vague terms
    or fuzzy meanings)

6
Exemplars Composition
  • Topic Sentences
  • A management issue that I have to deal with is
    how the schedule is handled.
  • Transition Sentences
  • This is a missed opportunity both in sales and
    customer service.
  • Contrasts
  • Two of my co-founding partners lack of
    leadership skills were the inability to listen
    and reason, which is quite odd because the
    partner I originally went into this project with
    was smart, talented, and eager to work at the
    early stage of the project but all that was a
    façade.
  • However, they are doing so effectively but not
    efficiently.

7
Exemplars Composition
  • For word emphasis, use italics, then, if
    necessary, use bold, and then, if necessary, use
    underline. For phrase emphasis, use an em-dash
    ()
  • Italics are also often used when introducing key
    nouns, especially proper nouns.
  • For word or phrase de-emphasis, use parentheses
    ( and ).
  • Emphasis (all emphases are in the original)
  • But as time went on, I couldnt help but notice
    that this particular situation was just a matter
    of starting off with a good first impression.
  • Leadership is the best work of management.
  • I just dont knowreally knowhow to balance my
    precious time at this job.
  • a proper career would allows for a certain
    level of autonomy and trust from managements
    side.
  • I think the store manager, Nikko, picked up on
    that right away.
  • De-emphasis
  • The managers assistant had to the take the
    water (its not fresh at that point) to the
    workroom to be dumped out. (de-emphasis in the
    original)

8
Exemplars Composition Transition words
  • Similarity Relationship
  • Furthermore, the manager did not provide any
    benefits such as health insurance. (emphasis
    added)
  • Difference Relationship
  • I thought all the employees they had hired were
    fashion designers and professionals. However, I
    later found out they were nonqualified
    individuals who where looking for jobs.
    (emphasis added)
  • Temporal Relationship
  • Ultimately, we were able to convince him to give
    customers the sale price on sodas, without any of
    the required limit (emphasis added)

9
Exemplars Prose
  • Short Sentences
  • We are a small firm.
  • The problem was never fully resolved.
  • Noun Phrases
  • This is where the burden fell on my shoulders.
    (emphasis added)
  • Verb Phrases
  • This not only allowed the business to get back
    on track, but also began replenishing my trust in
    him. (emphasis added)
  • Adjectives and Adverbs
  • Service makes a good restaurant amazing.
  • There is a restaurant. Its look externally is
    neither fancy nor beautiless.
  • Prepositions
  • Of all the experiences, one case came up to my
    mind instantly.

10
Exemplars Prose
  • Conjunctions and Coordination
  • The manager approved my idea, and now every week
    I have the employees and their supervisor sign
    their report.
  • Dependent Clauses
  • I suggested changes that will help the students
    as a whole and also included a way to advance the
    skills of the other upcoming and continuing
    tutors in the program.
  • My parents, who loved me dearly, wanted to
    instill a strong work ethic in me when they
    required me to get a job.
  • Sentence Openers and Inversion
  • Yet through all of this, I never complained to
    any coworker, manager, or any of the bosses.

11
Exemplars Prose
  • Left-Branching Sentences
  • On the rare occasions that they do notify me,
    they send an email saying a package in my name
    has arrived.
  • As I returned to my desk thinking on how mad
    this client sounded over the phone, I heard
    screaming coming from the reception area.
  • Right-Branching Sentences
  • Throughout my years as a Youth Advisor, the only
    time that the staff would come together as a
    whole was in the first fifteen minutes of work to
    discuss any individual problems that we may have
    faced the day prior with any of the kids that the
    staff should know about.
  • Appositives (one noun phrase redefining another,
    prior noun phrase)
  • I faced my most difficult organizational
    challenge while working for the San Diego Scout
    Shop, a retail store owned by the Boy Scouts of
    America.

12
Exemplars Prose
  • Interrogatories
  • For example, are safety measures taken
    seriously? Are consequences given for unsafe
    behavior? Are sanitary regulations kept
    up-to-date?
  • Have you ever been given your supervisors
    responsibilities?
  • Exclamatories
  • I hate my manager!
  • Imperatives
  • The burden is now on me to motivate and
    encourage my students to stay focused and to
    strive harder than before in order to do better.
  • Parallelism
  • Work tasks were monotonous unchallenging,
    unrewarding, and unsatisfying.
  • Managers have many responsibilities, and that
    includes organizing, motivating, coaching, and
    staffing.
  • Cohesion
  • After working there for another six months since
    the changes, I resigned.

13
Exemplars Sentence Variety Length
  • Aim, in general, for sentences around 20 words.
    But vary the sentence lengths. Think of 20 as a
    mean, as it were, for the entire document.
  • Examples from the same student-professional on
    the same document
  • Short-length sentences
  • We are a small firm.
  • Medium-length sentences
  • On the rare occasions that they do notify me,
    they send an email saying a package in my name
    has arrived.
  • Long-length sentences
  • Customer service is a problem faced by any
    service industry and this issue is a priority for
    restaurants because its a big part of the
    restaurant experience for the customer.

14
Exemplars Sentence Variety Types
  • Vary the types of your sentences. Even a 1 ½
    page essay will have a mix of all four main types
    of sentences.
  • A simple sentence has one independent clause.
  • A compound sentence consists of two or more
    independent clauses.
  • A complex sentence contains one independent
    clause and at least one dependent clause.
  • A compound-complex sentence has at least two
    independent clauses and at least one dependent
    clause.

15
Exemplars Sentence Variety Passive
constructions
  • In general, use active sentences. That is, write
    sentences where the subject is the clear focus.
  • But dont be afraid the use a passive
    construction for variety.
  • Also, sometimes it just sounds better and is more
    pleasant.
  • Its particular helpful when discussing rules or
    policies objectively.
  • Just like bold, italics, and underline, use
    passive constructions sparingly.
  • Passive construction
  • Employees are not permitted to be under the
    influence or in possession of drugs or alcohol
    during paid work hours.

16
Exemplars Originality
  • Some sentence construction, and by extension,
    paragraph construction, is highly original. Such
    sentences are memorable and distinctive. Such
    sentences represent the best of the writers
    thinking and expressiveness. When chosen well
    and used appropriately, these sentences have
    persuasive, lasting impact.
  • I walked into a cold, monotonous establishment.
    I knew no one, and understood no one. It was
    abuilding on a corner, weathered by the sun, and
    time. It was my first day as interim General
    Manager. I can still remember the icy cold air,
    the blue-tinted ambience, and the smell of
    grease.
  • my manager came back to the office after work
    because she forgot her wallet and was surprised
    to see me at my desk. She questioned why I had
    not gone home, and out of frustration, I replied,
    Well, there are only eight hours in a given
    workday, and when I have to do both your job and
    mine, those hours are simply not enough
  • For me this experience was very eye opening
    because I learned thatmany people have no
    business being managers.

17
Exemplars Originality
  • The cash register was more of a decorative
    statement than a functional instrument.
  • It all ended in one fell, and foul, swoop.
    (emphasis in the original)

18
Exemplars Rhythm
  • Some sentences are deliberately designed to flow
    well that is, the sentence is conscientiously
    rhythmic and effortlessly natural. Like deeply
    original sentences, these sentences too have
    persuasive, lasting impact.
  • Perhaps his planning was good, but his leading
    wasnt effective.
  • After cleaning my apron and preparing my pens
    for action, I am ready for another day of work at
    a local restaurant.

19
Exemplars Linkages to General Education (Basic
Skills)
  • In general, individuals with college degrees work
    on different issues than individuals without
    college degrees. Applying key concepts and ideas
    from fundamental courses matter deeply throughout
    your personal and professional life.
  • Computing
  • One potential way of transferring data is to
    create an Excel template and go about the process
    of manually inputting all customer data into the
    system. However, a more productive compromise
    would be scanning the data of current clients
    into the computer and from that point forward
    inputting all new client data into the computer.
  • English
  • My main problem with the team was lack of taking
    notes and then retaining the information for the
    next day.
  • Math
  • One day I made exactly 7.50 because I had one
    client who came in for a 15 haircut. That
    really frustrated and angered me because I was
    already charging 20 for friends and family.

20
Exemplars Linkages to General Education
(Subject Exploration)
  • Again, individuals with college degrees work on
    different issues than individuals without college
    degrees. Applying concepts and ideas from all
    breadth courses matter throughout your personal
    and professional life.
  • Arts and Humanities
  • Dealing with people is difficult, to say the
    least.
  • Comparative Cultures
  • Most problems are based on human beings or
    employees themselves. Also, these problems are
    different from countries and cultures because
    every country has its own working habits and
    behaviors.
  • Critical Reasoning
  • Using statistics for soccer can be good
    indicators of the areas of improvements. We can
    have 240 passes and three shots on goal, but live
    examples will encourage strategic applications of
    techniques to get more shots on goal.

21
Exemplars Linkages to General Education
(Subject Exploration)
  • Again, individuals with college degrees work on
    different issues than individuals without college
    degrees. Applying concepts and ideas from all
    breadth courses matter throughout your personal
    and professional life.
  • Government
  • Six bales with some of our larger, and more
    expensive, antique rugs had been flagged by US
    Customs in transit from Afghanistan they were
    being held at the dock for inspections.
  • History
  • The business has been running strong for over 25
    years here in the United States.
  • Natural Science
  • My first year at the afterschool program was
    very rewarding. I was the coach of several teams
    and leader of the science club.
  • Oral Communication
  • A simple thank you can go a long way.
  • Speaking in person definitely helped reduce the
    miscommunication and we were finally on the same
    page.

22
Exemplars Linkages to Domain/Subject Matter
  • Business students have successfully completed
    lower-division core classes. Students are
    incorporating these high-level concepts into
    their writing.
  • Accounting
  • When asked what I did to come up with the
    numbers on the financial statements, I had no
    answer. I had no explanation of how the numbers
    got there because I really didnt understand what
    I was doing.
  • Business Law
  • Economics
  • It was not until after hours were cut that it
    was made clear to us why we were failing to make
    sales management was modeling our locations
    sales goals on the sales numbers for a location
    in San Francisco.
  • I believe the overarching issue here is that the
    owners sole concern was making as much money as
    possible while keeping her labor costs to a
    minimum.
  • Statistics
  • On a normal weekend, our restaurant would
    average about 7,000 dollars however, on that
    specific night we made over 11,000 dollars.

23
Exemplars Linkages to Domain/Subject Matter
  • MGT 360 is the Principles of Management and
    Organizational Behavior. Students, already,
    have learned about planning, leading, organizing,
    and controlling and are incorporating these
    high-level concepts into their writing.
  • Planning
  • Elements of planning are demonstrated when high
    levels of management determine specific plans and
    goals of the bank tellers.
  • Leading
  • Elements of leading are seen when my manager
    tells me day-to-day words of encouragement and
    coaches me on how to improve my solutions pitch
    to customers.
  • Organizing
  • Organizing elements can be observed when my
    manager organizes my work schedules and where I
    am on the bank teller line directionally to
    maximize my number of customer interactions.
  • Controlling
  • Elements of controlling are seen when I am
    evaluated on my performance to reach my solutions
    goals at the each quarter end.

24
Exemplars Linkages to Domain/Subject Matter
  • Business students may have successfully completed
    one or more upper-division core classes, other
    than MGT 360. Students are incorporating these
    high-level concepts into their writing.
  • Finance
  • I receive creditwhen a banker successfully
    enrolls a customer into online banking, opens
    accounts, or upon approval of credit card, loan,
    and lines of credit applications set up by a
    banker.
  • Marketing
  • Fast forward to two years later when my boss
    broke the record of having 1,000 orders per day
    on Amazon.
  • Operations
  • Any store has sales problems at one point in
    their business cycle and it is simply
    inevitable.
  • In particular I recall my delivery job from 2013
    at a small business called Night Owl Cookies
    where I had a new method of making our deliveries
    more efficient.

25
Exemplars Rhetoric Quotes
  • Quotes
  • You cant teach an old dog new tricksUnknown
  • All ye abandon hope who enter hereDante
  • You cant create experience. You must undergo
    it.Albert Camus
  • There will be moments where fate rarely calls
    upon us during a moment of our choosingTransform
    ers (movie)
  • The single biggest problem in communication is
    the illusion that it has taken place.George
    Bernard Shaw

26
Exemplars Rhetoric Analogies
  • Analogies (General)
  • During my four years working at this coffee
    house, I had to deal with my share of good and
    bad. Customers wanted their free drink, and
    management wanted their sales numbers. (emphasis
    added)
  • As a business grows, the management team should
    grow with it. (emphasis added)
  • Analogies (Linkages to movie clip shown in first
    class)
  • Going to work every day became a chore if I knew
    I would be working with her. However, I knew in
    the back of my mind that the person that would
    have to change would be me. Just like in the
    clips the class instructor showed us in class,
    the horse trainer stated that your life is
    reflected into your horse, just like my
    inappropriate behavior reflects back into my
    team. (emphasis added)

27
Exemplars Rhetoric
  • Metaphors
  • Working in a pizzeria is all the fun that would
    be expected, but when the dough rises, so does
    hell. (emphasis added)
  • Unfortunately, when it rains, it pours.
    (emphasis added)
  • Similes
  • there is a breakdown in communication between
    personal goals and overall team goals. When you
    walk into our bank branch, there is the open
    area with the desks where the bankers sit, and
    the windows where the tellers stand. Tellers are
    separated by a bandit barrier to help ensure
    safety. It seems like this barrier has taken a
    more literal meaning. Everyone who works on the
    other side of the bandit barrier is completely
    separated from the open side. Oftentimes, it
    feels like were two separate countries who have
    become enemies at war. (emphasis added)
  • Working there felt like walking on eggshells.
    (emphasis added)
  • Topic/Content order
  • The current method of closing the books was to
    use Quickbooks online beginning on the 25th day
    of the month, but the new proposal was to begin
    that process five days earlier the 20th of each
    month. (order in the original)

28
Exemplars Rhetoric Arguments
  • Claim
  • As a result, I felt harassed and discouraged for
    most of my time with the company.
  • Reasoning
  • In my situation, my value was not based on the
    quality of my work, but on my failure to
    socialize.
  • Evidence
  • Subsequently, I began to experience a series of
    negative consequences, such asfrequent quality
    reviews, unprofessional emails, and threats to
    terminate my employment due to vague reasons.
  • Warrant (Theory)
  • In conclusion, management should always try to
    lead by example and provide all necessary tools
    for its employees to be successful.
  • Acknowledgement/Response (Counter-argument)
  • Initially, I was appreciative and excited of the
    invitations to socialize especially when they
    were paid by the owner.
  • Qualifications (Limitations)
  • Personally, I have had to opportunity to
    experience both sides of the business, as both an
    employee and part of the management staff.

29
Exemplars Figurative Language
  • There many different types of figures of
    speech. These are employed to provided
    additional emphasis for key ideas, concepts, or
    images in a narrative. In business prose
    figurative language can be helpful but only if
    used sparingly.
  • Cliché
  • The shoes you filled when Michael left were
    huge.
  • Personification
  • Hyperbole
  • Symbolism
  • Im confident in your ability to right the
    ship.
  • Synecdoche
  • Metonymy

30
References
  • Most of the categories for the Composition
    section of this presentation were excerpted and
    adapted from the following book
  • Hacker, D., and Sommers, N. (2011) A Writer's
    Reference (7th ed.), Bedford/St. Martin's,
    BostonMA.
  • A few of the categories for the Composition
    section of this presentation were excerpted and
    adapted from the following book
  • Garner, B. (2013) HBR Guide to Better Business
    Writing, Harvard Business Review Press,
    BostonMA.
  • The categories for the Prose section of this
    presentation were excerpted and adapted from the
    following book
  • Tufte, V. (2006), Artful Sentences, Graphics
    Press, Connecticut.
  • The categories for the Argument section of this
    presentation were excerpted and adapted from the
    following book
  • Williams, J., and Colomb, G. (2007), The Craft of
    Argument, 3rd ed., Pearson Education.
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