Adultery

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Adultery

• Is It Justified In Some Cases?

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When the Vow BreaksIs infidelity justified if
your spouse has dementia?Mary A. Fischer // AARP
Magazine (Nov. 2011, p. 81)

• Every Saturday around noon, Herb, 83, kisses his
  wife good-bye, then leaves their New York
  apartment and spends the afternoon with his
  girlfriend. His wife, Ruth, 73, has no idea her
  husband is seeing another woman. Three years
  after being diagnosed with Alzheimers disease,
  Ruth can barely speak or recognize Herb She
  cant hug or even kiss me anymore, says Herb. I
  longed for that closeness with a woman.

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When the Vow BreaksIs infidelity justified if
your spouse has dementia?Mary A. Fischer // AARP
Magazine (Nov. 2011, p. 81)

• Herbs situation is increasingly common, experts
  say ... Alzheimers and other cogitative
  disorders has created, it seems, a new type of
  spouse women and men who care for their partners
  but find romance outside the marriage Add in
  other forms of dementia and youve got a sizable
  population in need of care, many of them married.

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Human Morality Is Being Advocated

• God, not man directs our steps (Jer. 1023)
• Mans morality leads to problems (Judg. 176
  2125)

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When the Vow BreaksIs infidelity justified if
your spouse has dementia?Mary A. Fischer // AARP
Magazine (Nov. 2011, p. 81)

• But the caregivers face a quandary They crave
  intimacy but view extra-marital affairs as a
  serious moral violation ... Many religious and
  ethical teachers agree.
• Still, a new focus on the emotional needs of
  caregivers has prompted some psychologists,
  social workers, and even religious leaders to
  redefine adultery.

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A New Definition of AdulteryIs Being Advocated

• Adultery is defined by God, not redefined by
  man
• All sexual relationships outside of a
  God-ordained marriage are acts of adultery (Mt.
  532 199 Mk. 1011-2 Lk. 1618
  Rom. 73)
• All adulterers will be judged (Jn. 83-4,11 1
  Cor. 69 Gal. 519 Heb. 134 Rev. 222)

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Adultery Is Being Advocated

• What Does the New Testament Say?
• Moikalis (adulterous) Mt. 1239 164 Mk.
  838 Rom. 73 Jas. 44 2 Pet. 214
• Moikaomai (commit adultery) Mt. 532 199
  Mk. 1011-12
• Moikia (adultery) Mt. 1519 Mk. 721 Jn. 83
  Gal. 519
• Moikuo (commit adultery) Mt. 527-28 1918
  Mk. 1019 Lk. 1618 1820 Jn. 84 Rom. 222
  139 Jas. 211 Rev. 222
• Moikos (adulterers) Lk. 1811 1 Cor. 69 Heb.
  134 Jas. 44

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When the Vow BreaksIs infidelity justified if
your spouse has dementia?Mary A. Fischer // AARP
Magazine (Nov. 2011, p. 81-82)

• Says New Jersey rabbi Richard F. Address, The
  longevity revolution has created a variety of new
  life stages. Were confronted with the challenge
  of having our religion adapt to these new
  realities.
• Even televangelist Pat Robertson recently said
  that it might be ethical for a man to divorce his
  Alzheimers-stricken wife and remarry. I cant
  fault the man for wanting some kind of
  companionship, he said

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A Change In ReligionIs Being Advocated

• God (Mal. 36 Jas. 117) and Jesus (Heb.
  111-12 138) do not change in their character
• The NT does not change (Psa. 3311-12 11989
  1 Pet. 125)
• The pattern of the NT church does not change
  (2 Thess. 215 2 Tim. 113)

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When the Vow BreaksIs infidelity justified if
your spouse has dementia?Mary A. Fischer // AARP
Magazine (Nov. 2011, p. 82)

• For caregivers contemplating new relationships,
  some ethical guidelines can help. Foremost is
  maintaining high-quality care for the ailing
  spouse. As long as you provide dignified care
  and honor your spouse, you need not feel guilty
  about seeking extramarital companionship, says
  Cynthia Epstein, a licensed social worker at New
  York Universitys Langone Medical Center.
  Dementia can persist for 20 years, she adds
  Thats a long time do without a gratifying
  connection.

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When the Vow BreaksIs infidelity justified if
your spouse has dementia?Mary A. Fischer // AARP
Magazine (Nov. 2011, p. 82)

• Ethicist Arthur Caplan agrees. I dont think it
  is abandonment or disloyalty to form a new
  relationship once your spouse declines to the
  point where they cannot possibly interact, love,
  or respond, says Caplan, director of the Center
  for Bioethic at the University of Pennsylvania.
  As long as you do your best to make sure they
  are properly cared for, you are entitled to seek
  companionship.

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Situation Ethics and Moral RelativityAre Being
Advocated

• Clearly, what is being advocated by these
  licensed experts is situation ethics and moral
  relativity that is, it is justified to commit
  adultery given the situation of Alzheimer's,
  dementia, etc.
• Remember, wrong is wrong, sin is sin as defined
  by God and in all situations (Rom. 323 1 Jn.
  34 517)
• We are not allowed to do evil that good may come
  (Rom. 38 61)

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Situation Ethics and Moral RelativityAre Being
Advocated

• Situation ethics insults God (Rom. 34)
• Situation ethics deifies man (Prov. 1412)
• Situation ethics redefines the Bible and sin
  (Jn. 1248 1717 1 Jn. 35 1517)
• Situation ethics perverts love (Jn. 1415 1514
  Rom. 138-10 1 Jn. 54)

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What Other Cases of Adultery Will We Justify in
the Future?

• Situations involving a coma or a stroke
• Situations involving an extended hospital stay
• Situations of pedophilia or incest

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When the Vow BreaksIs infidelity justified if
your spouse has dementia?Mary A. Fischer // AARP
Magazine (Nov. 2011, p. 82)

• The article goes on to discuss the following
  issues
• What constitutes proper care
• Married caregivers must respect prospective
  partners enough to provide clear ground rules
• Those considering dating a married caregiver must
  be realistic

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When the Vow BreaksIs infidelity justified if
your spouse has dementia?Mary A. Fischer // AARP
Magazine (Nov. 2011, p. 82)

• The article goes on to discuss the following
  issues
• Should caregivers confess their new
  relationships?
• Those married with dementia should seek romances
• What about lonely caregivers who believe dating
  is unacceptable?

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When the Vow BreaksIs infidelity justified if
your spouse has dementia?Mary A. Fischer // AARP
Magazine (Nov. 2011, p. 82)

• For his part, caregiver Herb sees a therapist
  weekly and often discusses his guilt over his
  affair. Still, he says, his girlfriends
  affection has revitalized him. Im still a
  normal male who has needs, he says, and this
  new relationship has been wonderful.

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What Is A Christian To Do?

• But evil men and impostors shall wax worse and
  worse, deceiving and being deceived.
• But abide thou in the things which thou hast
  learned and hast been assured of, knowing of whom
  thou hast learned them.
• And that from a babe thou hast known the sacred
  writings which are able to make thee wise unto
  salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus.
• Every scripture inspired of God is also
  profitable for teaching, for reproof, for
  correction, for instruction which is in
  righteousness.
• That the man of God may be complete, furnished
  completely unto every good work. (2 Timothy
  313-17)