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Grief and Bereavement

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Grief and Bereavement Agenda Definition The tasks of the bereaved Support for the grieving person Grief Grief is a natural and normal response to a loss ... – PowerPoint PPT presentation

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Title: Grief and Bereavement


1
Grief and Bereavement
2
Agenda
  • Definition
  • The tasks of the bereaved
  • Support for the grieving person

3
Grief
  • Grief is a natural and normal response to a loss
  • The loss may have already occurred or may be
    anticipated
  • Responses are emotional, physical, social and
    spiritual
  • Intense feelings and emotions are normal and
    purposeful

4
  • The goal of the grieving person is to find the
    delicate balance between the past that should be
    remembered and a future that must be created.

5
Grief Responses..
  • May be physical, emotional, social, and spiritual

6
Physical Reactions
  • Appetite change (up or down)
  • Sleep disruptions
  • Upset stomach, headaches
  • Restlessness
  • Crying
  • Sighing
  • Lethargy

7
Emotional Responses
  • Anger
  • Blaming
  • Hopelessness
  • Panic
  • Anxiety
  • Guilt
  • Sadness and depression
  • Relief

8
Social Responses
  • Withdrawal
  • Aggressiveness
  • Over protectiveness
  • Separation anxiety, fearfulness
  • Disinterest in others
  • Change in school performance

9
Mental Responses
  • Concentration problems
  • Memory problems
  • Continuously thinking about the loss
  • Difficulty accepting the reality of the loss
  • Feeling nothing is real

10
Spiritual Responses
  • Awareness of fragility of life
  • Searching for meaning in the loss
  • Appreciation of lessons from the person who died
  • Challenge to ones faith
  • Experiencing the presence of the deceased

11
  • Instrumental
  • vs.
  • Intuitive Grieving

12
Myths About Grief
  • Grief is orderly and predictable.
  • Everyone grieves the same.
  • Grief is over after the funeral service/the first
    year/after three days/etc.
  • If you ignore grief, it will go away.
  • Staying busy is a good way to cope.
  • If someone is not showing emotion, they are
    handling their grief well.
  • The goal of grief is to get over it.

13
Tasks Of The Bereaved
  • Acknowledge the reality of the death
  • Experience the pain of the loss
  • Adjust to an environment in which the deceased is
    missing
  • Go on living without that person, keeping them
    present in heart and mind

14
Grief Vs. Clinical Depression
  • Grief
  • Labile mood
  • Able to experience some pleasure
  • Can express anger appropriately
  • Clinical depression
  • Consistently low mood
  • Unable to experience pleasure/ withdrawn
  • Anger is turned inward

15
  • Grief
  • Preoccupied with the loss
  • Is hopeful
  • Responds to support
  • Self-esteem intact
  • Clinical Depression
  • Preoccupied with self-blame
  • Feels hopeless, helpless
  • No response to support
  • Lack of self-esteem

16
Grief Trajectory
  • Shock suffering recovery
  • Shock protest disorganization
    reorganization
  • Disbelief anger and guilt restlessness
    acceptance
  • Shock searching and yearning disorientation -
    reorganization

17
Factors Affecting Grief
  • How the person died
  • Relationship with the person who died
  • Cultural or family traditions and expectations
  • Experiences with death and grief
  • Ones own strengths and resources

18
Euphemisms
  • Grandma is sleeping.
  • Grandpa went on a trip
  • We lost Daddy
  • Joe passed away passed on expired
  • went to meet his heavenly maker
  • pushing up daisies
  • kicked the bucket, croaked
  • taking a dirt nap, bit the dust

19
Offering Support
  • Listen, listen, listen!!!
  • Try to understand the grief process
  • Encourage expression of feelings whatever they
    are
  • Be patient
  • Keep what is shared confidential

20
Not Helpful
  • It was Gods will
  • Only the good die young
  • God needed her
  • God will not give you more than you can handle
  • At least she didnt suffer.
  • At least he is out of his suffering

21
Not Helpful
  • At least you have another sister.
  • Now you have to be the man of the
  • house.
  • I know how you feel.
  • Time heals all wounds.
  • Youll get over it.
  • Everything happens for a reason.
  • Arent you over it yet?

22
Helpful
  • Im sorry.
  • I care about you and what you are going
    through.
  • Talk about the loved one
  • Share stories
  • Celebrate the loved ones life
  • Sincerely ask How are you doing? and How can I
    help?
  • then, follow their lead.

23
Some Things You Can Do
  • Help them name their feelings (sad, hurt, angry).
  • Encourage them to be patient with themselves.
  • Share the knowledge that it is okay to laugh, to
    play, and to have a good time. It does not mean
    that they did not love the person who died.

24
Supportive
  • Help identify and find needed resources
  • Support groups
  • Attend with the grieving person if needed
  • Actions may offer more support than words offer
    concrete help
  • Offer to have family coming for the funeral stay
    at your house pick people up at the airport
  • Organize meals

25
Supportive
  • Offer to go with the grieving friend to make
    funeral arrangements
  • Make necessary phone calls to notify other
    friends of the family
  • Help with thank-you notes
  • Stay in touch with the grieving person.
  • Greatest need for support is in the weeks and
    months that follow

26
  • Extended support is particularly important when
    the death involved tragic circumstances such as
    suicide, homicide or an accident.
  • Let survivors know they dont need to hide the
    cause of death
  • Let survivors know it is not their fault
  • Help find professional support, if appropriate

27
Encourage Self-care
  • Need to accept their intense feelings as
    rational, normal and necessary
  • Need to normalize their feelings of grief
  • Its OK to cry and OK to laugh
  • Encourage the person to accept support
  • Support and help with tasks of daily living
  • Food, water, exercise go for a walk, or out to
    eat together

28
Encourage Self-care
  • Encourage
  • Sharing of feelings and concerns
  • Talking about the loved one
  • Being patient with themselves
  • Maintaining good nutrition and sleep habits
  • Encourage the person to maintain contact with
    others and not isolate
  • Encourage the person to embrace their
    spirituality
  • Talk with clergy Pray or meditate

29
  • Grief is the other side of love.
  • As painful as mourning is, it would not happen if
    there were no love in the first place. The
    mourning process is a normal part of the life
    process. It is through death that we ultimately
    learn the meaning of life.
  • Chaplain Hank Dunn
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