Title: Real answers given by exam candidates:
1Real answers given by exam candidates
Blood flows down one leg and up the other.
2Real answers given by exam candidates
Christians go on pilgrimage to Lord's.
3Real answers given by exam candidates
A magnet is something you find crawling all over
a dead cat.
4Real answers given by exam candidates
Mushrooms always grow in damp places and so they
look like umbrellas.
5Real answers given by exam candidates
The moon is a planet just like the earth, only
it is even deader.
6Real answers given by exam candidates
The tides are a fight between the Earth and
moon. All water tends towards the moon, because
there is no water in the moon, and nature abhors
a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this
fight.
7Real answers given by exam candidates
To keep milk from turning sour Keep it in the
cow.
8Real answers given by exam candidates
To remove dust from the eye, pull the eye down
over the nose.
9Real answers given by exam candidates
A Christian should have only one wife. This is
called monotony.
10Real answers given by exam candidates
A fossil is an extinct animal. The older it is,
the more extinct it is.
11Real answers given by exam candidates
Name the four seasons Salt, mustard, pepper,
vinegar.
12Real answers given by exam candidates
Noah's wife was Joan of Ark.
13Real answers given by exam candidates
The people who followed Jesus were called the 12
decibels.
14Real answers given by exam candidates
The seventh commandment is, thou shalt not admit
adultery.
15Real answers given by exam candidates
What is a co-operative? It's a kind of shop that
is not as dear as places like Marks and Spencer.
16Real answers given by exam candidates
What is Britain's highest award for valour in
war? Nelson's Column.
17Real answers given by exam candidates
When you smell an odourless gas, it is probably
carbon monoxide.
18Real answers given by exam candidates
The skeleton is what is left after the insides
have been taken out and the outsides have been
taken off. The purpose of the skeleton is
something to hitch meat to.
19Exam Stress
Children in England are the most tested in the
world. According to the TES, it is estimated
that they will undertake up to 105 tests and
exams during their school years. These include
SATs, GCSEs, NVQs, GNVQs, A Levels, CATs,
reading, listening, language and IQ tests.
20Exam Stress
One headteacher worked out that students are out
of lessons for at least 46 weeks in the course of
their seven-year secondary careers and spend 150
hours actually sitting exams.
21Exam Stress
As a result of the pressure this creates,
Childline estimates that it receives 800 calls a
year from pupils suffering from exam stress, some
of them as young as nine years old. Also the
annual cost of exams and tests has increased to
more than 200 million - a 50 per cent rise since
1997.
22Exam Stress
And to make matters worse, after all the stress,
anxiety, effort and sleepless nights, when the
results come in, the media tell us that exams are
getting easier!