Invitation Etiquette

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Invitation Etiquette

• http//www.party411.com/invitations.html
• http//homegarden.expertvillage.com/experts/invita
  tion-etiquette.htm

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Party Invitation

• When to Send Your Invitation
• Send your invitation two to three weeks in
  advance of the dinner party.
• Send invitations out eight weeks before
  (especially to out-of-town guests) your event. If
  you are planning a non-profit event or a special
  event at a convention or tradeshow, you may want
  to consider sending a save-the-date card in
  advance since people tend to book up quickly!
  Save the Dates can be sent as much as 3 months in
  advance. Holiday weekends are especially busy for
  everyone--so, if you're having a party to
  celebrate a special event (such as a wedding or
  Bat Mitzvah), be sure to get those invitations
  out early.

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When to send out invitations?http//www.emilypost
.com/everyday/rude_situations.htm
The Event When to Invite
Anniversary party 3 to 6 weeks
Bar or Bat Mitzvah 1 month
Bon Voyage party Last minute to 3 weeks
Casual party Same day to 2 weeks
Charity Ball 6 weeks to 3 months
Christmas party 1 month
Cocktail party 1 to 4 weeks
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Debutante Ball 6 weeks to 3 months
Formal dinner 3 to 6 weeks
Graduation party 3 weeks
Housewarming party A few days to 3 weeks
Informal dinner A few days to 3 weeks
Lunch or Tea A few days to 2 weeks
Thanksgiving dinner 2 weeks to 2 months
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Informal Invitations

• It's absolutely fine to call people up, and say
• 'I am having a party in a week. Can you come?'

• For an informal invitation you may do something
  like this

You are cordially invited for dinner On Friday,
October 7th 7 o'clock Address Your name RSVP
or please reply your phone number
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Formal Invitations

• Wording your Invitation
• 1. All phrasing is in the third person.
• 2. Punctuation is not used at the ends of lines
  (commas, periods, colons, etc.) however, commas
  are used within lines to separate the day from
  the date, the city from the state and a man's
  surname from "Jr./junior/II/III," etc.
• 3. No abbreviations are used. Either spell out a
  name or leave it out "Mark Claude Manet" not
  "Mark C. Manet." Also, "Road," "Street,"
  "Avenue," "Reverend," "Doctor," and all military
  titles should be spelled out. Exceptions are
  "Mr." and "Mrs."

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Wording your invitationcontinued

• 4. If both Mr. and Mrs. Smith are doctors, they
  can be referred to as "The Doctors Smith."
• 5. Days, dates, and times are always spelled
  out.
• 6. Only proper nouns are capitalized (names of
  people and places, cities, states, name of the
  day of the week, month name, etc.) Exceptions are
  the year line ("Two thousand") or where the noun
  is the beginning of a new sentence or thought
  ("T" in "The favour of a reply is requested" or
  "Reception to follow")

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Wording your invitationcontinued

• 7. Be consistent with your usage of
  "honour/favour" or "honor/favor." Traditionally
  the formal, British spelling with the "u" is
  preferred in proper wedding etiquette, but
  whichever form you choose, use it in both words.
• 8. It is considered socially incorrect to
  write, "no children please" on the invitation or
  any part of the wedding ensemble. "Black tie"
  does not traditionally appear on the invitation.
  If the event takes place after six o'clock, your
  guests should assume that it is a formal event.
  If you are concerned, however, you may write
  "Black tie" as a right footnote on your reception
  card. Note the "B" in "Black tie" is
  capitalized, but not the "t."

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Wording your invitationcontinued

• 9. It is considered extremely socially
  incorrect to make any mention of gifts on
  invitations on the theory that we should expect
  nothing from our friends except their presence,
  therefore never list where you are registered,
  the name of a charity for donations or your
  desire for money rather than presents. The only
  slight exception to this strict rule is for
  shower invitations where it is permitted to list
  the theme of the gifts ("Linens", etc.) but never
  where one is registered or any mention whatsoever
  of money.

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Example of a formal invitation
Name (Ms. Cathleen Hanson) Requests the pleasure
of your company for The event (dinner) Date
line (Friday, the seventh of October) Time (at
seven o'clock) Address Favor of reply is
requested
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How to address people on an invitation

• It depends on how the people prefer to be
  addressed.
• Some people prefer to be addressed with their
  husband's name - "Mr. Mrs. Robert Boon".
• Some people would prefer to have their name as
  well - "Mr. Robert and Mrs. Virginia Boon".
• Sometimes, the woman would have a higher title
  than the man - "Dr. Mr. Lee". Or, it could be
  "Dr. Cynthia Lee and Mr. Douglas Perry".
• A couple that is not married would have their
  names on separate lines.

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Information on Dress Code

• You should list any dress required of the guests
  in the lower right hand corner of the invitation.
  
• "Semiformal" usually means that a man or woman
  can choose a more laid-back outfit, such as dress
  slacks instead of a dress or suit.
• "Black Tie" or "Formal" usually signifies
  tuxedoes for the men and dresses for the women.
• "White Tie" is the most formal evening wear. It
  means, just what its name implies, for a man -
  white tie, wing collar and tailcoat. For a woman
  a long elegant gown should be worn. White tie is
  advised for only the most diplomatic or dramatic
  occasions.
• If you go too far in your dress code people may
  not feel comfortable enough to enjoy themselves.

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Drinks to the party

• If you want others to bring their own drinks to
  the dinner party, you can put "BYOB" on the
  invitation. This stands for "bring your own
  bottle" and guests can bring a favorite drink of
  their choice to share.
• If you are planning a potluck, you can also put
  this on the invite. It is advisable to assign
  specific dishes for people to bring, so that you
  don't end up with a lot of side casseroles and no
  main courses or vice-versa.

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RSVP

• From the French, it means Répondez, sil vous
  plaît, or, Please reply.
• This little code has been around for a long time
  and its definitely telling you that your hosts
  want to know if you are attending. Reply
  promptly, within a day or two of receiving an
  invitation.

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How do I respond? Reply in the manner indicated
on the invitation.

• RSVP and no response card a handwritten response
  to the host at the return address on the
  envelope.
• Response Card fill in and reply by the date
  indicated and return in the enclosed envelope.
• RSVP with phone number telephone and make sure
  to speak in person answering machines can be
  unreliable.
• RSVP with email you may accept or decline
  electronically.
• Regrets only reply only if you cannot attend. If
  your host doesnt hear from you, he is expecting
  you!
• No reply requested? Unusual, but it is always
  polite to let someone know your intentions. A
  phone call would be sufficient.

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Is that your final answer?

• Changing a yes to a no is only acceptable on
  account of illness or injury, a death in the
  family or an unavoidable professional or business
  conflict. Call your hosts immediately.
• Canceling because you have a better offer is a
  sure fire way to get dropped from ALL the guest
  lists.
• Being a no show is unacceptable.
• Changing a no to a yes is OK only if it will
  not upset the hosts arrangements.

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May I bring

• Dont even ask! An invitation is extended to the
  people the hosts want to inviteand no one else.
• a date. Some invitations indicate that you may
  invite a guest or date (Mr. John Evans and Guest)
  and when you reply, you should indicate whether
  you are bringing someone, and convey their name.
• my children. If they were invited, the
  invitation would have said so.
• my houseguest. Its best to decline the
  invitation, stating the reason. This gives your
  host the option to extend the invitation to your
  guests, or not.

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Say Thank You.

• Make sure to thank your hosts before you leave,
  and then again by phone or note the next day.

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How to be the perfect guest

• http//www.videojug.com/film/how-to-be-the-perfect
  -guest

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Useful Websites

• http//www.mygatsby.com/invitations/etiquette/
• (wedding invitations, baby showers, and
  general invitations)
• http//www.southworth.com/page.php?id127
• (wedding invitations)
• http//www.emilypost.com/everyday/invitation_etiqu
  ette.htm