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WRITTEN COMMUNICATIONS AVCM (AW) Kelly Kelly United States

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WRITTEN COMMUNICATIONS AVCM (AW) Kelly Kelly United States Navy Senior Enlisted Academy Leadership Symposium * Leadership Symposium * Leadership Symposium ... – PowerPoint PPT presentation

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Title: WRITTEN COMMUNICATIONS AVCM (AW) Kelly Kelly United States


1
WRITTEN COMMUNICATIONS
  • AVCM (AW) Kelly Kelly
  • United States Navy
  • Senior Enlisted Academy

2
(No Transcript)
3
Overview
  • Effective Writing
  • Paragraph Development
  • Passive Voice
  • Writing Errors
  • Written Communications
  • Awards
  • Evaluations

4
EFFECTIVE WRITING
  • Adapts to the Audience
  • Makes a Good First Impression
  • Effectively Organized
  • Looks Professional

5
Adapts to the Audience
  • Know your Audience
  • Understand their needs, preferences, and
    expectations
  • Know your Subject
  • Depth of information appropriate for the audience
  • Purpose of Written Communication

6
Makes a Good First Impression
  • Get the readers attention or interest
  • Avoid creating a negative First Impression
  • Focus on the Receivers Interest and Needs
  • Limit use of I statements, Focus on You
    (reader)
  • Keep your Tone Friendly yet Professional
  • Sentences relatively short, correct grammar, etc
  • Get to the Point Quickly making Key Ideas Obvious
  • Proofread

7
Effectively Organized
  • Proper Clarity and Length
  • Utilize Three Part Communications
  • Utilize bullets
  • Quality over Quantity

8
Three Part Communications
  • Introduction
  • Topic/Thesis
  • Motivation
  • Overview
  • Body
  • Main points which support the topic
  • Organized logically
  • Sequentially
  • Chronologically
  • Geographically
  • Transitions
  • Conclusion
  • Summary
  • Remotivate
  • Closure

9
Bullets are Visual Signposts
  • Bullets help a reader to skim
  • Bullets emphasize key ideas
  • Bullets often enliven a text

Bullet Construction
  • Expresses its content concisely
  • Contains the same basic sentence structure
  • Completes the clause
  • Uses three part communications

10
Qualities
  • Present only the vital facts and key qualities
  • Present them succinctly
  • Phrase them clearly-in plain English, no jargon

11
Looks Professional
  • Attention to Detail
  • Format
  • White Space is good
  • Grammar
  • Spelling

12
Paragraph Development
  • Paragraph Construction
  • Ensure ideas follow one another clearly
  • Supply adequate information
  • Avoid thinness
  • Paragraph Unity
  • Discuss only one topic in a paragraph
  • State topic in a sentence in the paragraph
  • All sentences must support the topic sentence

13
The Because Test
  • Rules for the because test
  • Read the topic sentence
  • State because
  • Read supporting sentences
  • If the sentence sounds logical, it should be a
    good supporting sentence
  • If the sentence doesnt relate or sound logical,
    rework the sentence to support the main idea
  • Do this with each supporting sentence

14
Paragraph DevelopmentTexas is a Hunters Paradise
Texas is a hunters paradise. Fox, quail and
other small game abound in the piney woods of
East Texas. On the high plains of Northwest
Texas, coyotes, jackrabbits and prairie dogs
challenge the hunter who prefers the wide open
spaces. In South Texas hill country, numerous
small lakes and rivers invite the angler to try
his hand at catching bass and trout. In the
hills and dry washes of West Texas, the hunter
must be constantly alert for desert cats and
rattlesnakes as he stalks wild goats and sheep.
There is probably no other place in the world
where such a diversity of game is so near at hand
as in Texas.
15
Passive Voice
VERB FORMS THAT MAKE THE VOICE PASSIVE ARE VERBS
OF BEING (is, are, am, was, were, be, being,
been) PLUS THE PAST PARTICIPLE FORM OF A
VERB (given, seen, done, written, opened,
sent) The aircraft was painted by Corrosion
Control work center personnel . Corrosion
Control work center personnel painted the
aircraft.

16
Passive Voice
17
Naval Writing Standards
  • The need to improve
  • Organized writing
  • Natural writing
  • Compact writing

18
Writing Errors
  • Lack of organization and flow
  • Lack of paragraph unity
  • Excessive use of commas
  • Lack of transitional devices
  • Subject and verb disagreement
  • Ambiguous/faulty pronoun reference
  • Fragmented sentences/run on sentences
  • Spelling errors
  • Capitalization


19
Spell-check, is it Failsafe?
Eye halve a spelling chequer. It came with my
pea sea. It plainly marques four my revue. Miss
steaks eye kin knot sea. Eye strike a key and
type a word, and weight four it two say weather
eye am wrong oar write. It shows me strait a
weigh. As soon as a mist ache is maid. It nose
bee fore two long, and eye can put the error
rite. Its rare lea ever wrong. Eye have run this
poem threw it. I am shore your pleased two no,
its letter perfect awl the weigh my chequer
tolled me sew.
20
Specifics
  • Sailor is always capitalized
  • (1996 Admiral Mike Boorda)
  • Ships names are All CAPS
  • (USS KITTY HAWK (CV-63))
  • Exercises are All CAPS
  • (EXERCISE PHOENIX EXPRESS 10)
  • United States is spelled out if used as a noun,
    may be abbreviated U.S. if used as an adjective,
    never abbreviate as US

21
References
  • Department of the Navy Correspondence Manual
    (SECNAV M-5216.5) March 2010
  • The Naval Institute Guide to Naval Writing

22
Written Communications
  • E-mail
  • Counseling chits
  • Training Lectures
  • Correspondence

23
E-Mails
  • Subject Line
  • Write from the readers perspective
  • Include all the background information
  • Anticipate questions
  • Keep it short
  • BLUF

24
E-Mails
  • Spell Check
  • Proper pitch and font
  • No background stationary
  • Signature block
  • Paper trail
  • Be careful what you say because Big Brother is
    watching

25
Counseling Chits
  • Positive Counseling Chits
  • Negative Counseling Chits
  • Keep accurate records
  • Verbal is good once but after that document
  • Document, Document, Document
  • Routine documentation is the key to a successful
    evaluation program

26
Training Lessons
  • Designed with a purpose
  • Knowledgeable Instructor
  • Interactive
  • Examples
  • Current
  • Death by Power Point

27
Awards
  • Instructions
  • Policy Consideration
  • Forms
  • Opening Lines
  • Samples

28
AWARDS MANUAL(SECNAVINST 1650. 1H)
  • PURPOSE
  • Guidance Regulations About Awards
  • (Individuals Units)
  • Samples of ALL awards
  • Navy Department Awards Web Service (NDAWS)
  • https//awards.navy.mil
  • DOD other services

29
POLICY CONSIDERATION
  • General Rules
  • Only One Award for an Act, Achievement, or Period
    of Meritorious Service
  • Exception
  • Awards for Heroism or Specific Achievement Within
    The Period
  • (In this case the summaries and citations cannot
    be identical)

30
POLICY CONSIDERATION
  • Nomination
  • Intended To Recognize Exceptional Performance
    Valor
  • Specific Acts Should Be Awarded ASAP
  • (normally 60 days prior)
  • exception
  • Security requirements
  • Time required to investigate

31
POLICY CONSIDERATION
  • Submission Time Limit
  • Presentation Time Limit
  • Recognition Consideration
  • EOT
  • Specific Achievement/Impact Award
  • Sailor of the Year
  • Mid-tour (Not appropriate)
  • Retirement (Only includes last duty station)

32
FORMS
  • 1650/3 Personal Award Recommendation
  • Most Important Award Document
  • Step by Step Instructions
  • Must be accurate
  • Summary of Action
  • (Required For All Awards Except Command Approved
    Navy Achievement Medals)
  • 1) Opening statement
  • 2) Bullets
  • 3) Closing statement

33
(No Transcript)
34
Summary of Action
  • SOA Starts Like An Evaluation
  • Be Specific
  • Avoid Jargon
  • Explicit Comparisons with the Standard
  • Numbers
  • Service Beyond The Call Of Duty
  • Sell Sell

35
CITATION
  • Standard Format
  • Opening Statement
  • 2-3 Bullets
  • Use Very Few Abbreviations

36
CITATION
  • Clear Stand Alone Document
  • Achievement or Commendation Medals
  • 7 1/2 Lines
  • All Upper Case Letters In Courier New, 10 pt
  • Avoid Pretentious Adjectives
  • Spell Out Names i.e. Jr., Sr., III
  • Designation not required, if used, only primary
    designation is utilized, additional designations
    are never appropriate

37
OPENING STATEMENTS
  • Meritorious Service Medal For outstanding
    meritorious achievement or service...
  • Air Medal For heroic (or meritorious)
    achievement in aerial flight...
  • Joint Service Commendation Medal For
    meritorious service (or meritorious achievement)
    while serving as...

38
OPENING STATEMENTS
  • Navy and Marine Corps Commendation Medal For
    meritorious service (or meritorious achievement)
    (or heroic service) (or heroic achievement) while
    serving as...
  • Joint Service Achievement Medal For
    professional achievement in the superior
    performance of duties while serving as...
  • Navy and Marine Corps Achievement Medal For
    professional achievement in the superior
    performance of his/her duties while serving
    as...

39
  • The Secretary of the Navy takes pleasure in
    presenting the NAVY AND MARINE CORPS COMMENDATION
    MEDAL to
  • JOHN DOE
  • MACHINIST'S MATE FIRST CLASS
  • UNITED STATES NAVY
  • for service as set forth in the following
    CITATION
  • For meritorious service while serving as the
    Leading Petty Officer, Naval Diving and Salvage
    Training Center ,Panama City, Florida from 15
    August 1985 to 15 August 1988.
  • SPECIFIC ACCOMPLISHMENTS (USUALLY 3 BULLETS)
  • (7 1/2 LINES MAX)
  • Petty Officer Doe reflected great credit upon
    herself and upheld the highest traditions of the
    United States Naval Service.
  • For the Secretary of
    the Navy

40
  • PETTY OFFICER XXXXX DEMONSTRATED EXCEPTIONAL
    INITIATIVE AND SUPERB ATTENTION TO DETAIL IN THE
    SUPERVISING AND TRAINING OF 43 POWERPLANTS
    PERSONNEL.  HIS EXCEPTIONAL ENTHUSIASM,
    OUTSTANDING TECHNICAL EXPERTISE AND LEADERSHIP
    SKILLS ENABLED THE SAFE AND TIMELY REMOVAL AND
    REPLACEMENT OF 202 GE-F404-400 ENGINES AND 18
    FUEL CELL RELATED SYSTEM COMPONENTS, WHICH
    CONTRIBUTED TO THE SQUADRONS REMARKABLE 96
    PERCENT SORTIE COMPLETION RATE AND THE
    QUALIFICATION OF 72 FLEET REPLACEMENT PILOTS.
    ADDITIONALLY, HIS DEVOTION TO TRAINING AND
    PROFESSIONAL GROWTH OF OTHERS WAS INSTRUMENTAL
    AND INCREASED THE OVERALL TRAINING READINESS FOR
    POWER PLANTS WORK CENTER AND THE MAINTENANCE
    DEPARTMENT.  

41
  • PETTY OFFICER XXXXs INSPIRATIONAL LEADERSHIP AND
    TECHNICAL EXPERTISE GUIDED HIS WORKCENTER TO
    EXCEED ALL PRODUCTION GOALS FOR FY-99, FY-00, AND
    FY-01.  HIS COMMITMENT TO HIGH QUALITY
    MAINTENANCE CULMINATED IN THE SAFE TEST AND
    REPAIR OF OVER 4000 WRAS.  HIS TIRELESS EFFORTS
    WERE EVIDENT THROUGH TWO CONSECUTIVE WESTPAC
    DEPLOYMENTS TO THE ARABIAN SEA BEFORE AND AFTER
    THE EVENTS OF SEPTEMBER 11, 2001.

42
  • XXXXX DEMONSTRATED EXCEPTIONAL LEADERSHIP AND
    MANAGEMENT ABILITIES BY LEADING A 32 PERSON
    DIVISION AND ENSURING GETTYSBURGS CIC TEAM
    MAINTAINED 100 PERCENT READINESS DURING CNT
    OPERATIONS. HIS SUPERLATIVE TACTICAL EXPERTISE
    HAS RESULTED IN 25 PERSONNEL BEING QUALIFIED IN 6
    DIFFERENT WATCHSTATIONS IN CIC.  ADDITIONALLY
    DURINGPOTUS MISSION 2005 HE FLAWLESSLY
    CONTROLLED TWO FIGHTERS AND ENSURED THE POTUS
    WOULD HAVE A SAFE EXIT FROM PANAMA IF ANY
    EMERGENCY SITUATION ARRISED. HIS EXHAUSTIVE
    EFFORTS CONTRIBUTED TO OUTSTANDING COMBAT
    READINESS.  

43
PRETENTIOUS PHRASES
  • Paragon Of Success
  • Instrumental in the preparation and revision
  • of
  • Had a profound influence on the efficiency
    and effectiveness of
  • Initiating and implementing an efficient,
    effective, and accountable organization to gain
    the necessary visibility and control during

44
Evaluations
  • Evaluation Preparation has several components
    Mid-Term counseling
  • Brag sheet
  • Evaluation

45
Mid-Term Counseling
  • Should not have any marks
  • Strengths
  • Weaknesses
  • Achievements
  • Guidance
  • Goals
  • Timely

46
Brag Sheet
  • Written, on-going records of performance
  • Starts the day after the last reporting period
  • Daily/Weekly/Monthly
  • Quantify what you did and the result
  • Garbage In/Garbage Out

47
Evaluations
  • Serve three functions
  • Document performance
  • Provide feedback
  • Serve as a basis for decisions by selection
    boards

48
(No Transcript)
49
Blocks 1 - 30
  • Common Mistakes
  • Block 1 Name misspelled
  • Block 9 Report date incorrect
  • Block 14-15 Dates incorrect
  • Block 20 PRT (Fixed with new version)
  • Block 29 Primary/Watchstanding/Collateral
    duties. Needs to list how many people you led to
    show Sailorization.

50
Duties and Responsibilities
  • Focus on primary duty and be outstanding.
  • When do you do your job, if you have tons of
    collateral duties.
  • No amount of collateral duties can make up for
    mediocrity in primary duty.
  • Collateral duties can help to round out a
    Sailors overall experience.
  • Command/Department/Division have more impact

51
Quantitative vs. Non-Quantitative
  • Quantitative means provide the numbers
  • Dollars saved
  • Missions flown
  • Sailors supervised
  • Impact on command
  • Non-Quantitative means achievement details
  • Adjectives with supporting details

52
Eval Bullets
  • Format
  • Action verb .. Object of the Action ..
    Results/impact of the Action
  • Must answer the So What question
  • Relate to Mission/Command Accomplishments
  • Be Honest
  • Be Specific
  • Dont be vague/too flowery/generic

53
Analyze
  • Ranked 1 of 5 highly competitive ITs. IT1
    Smith is the most productive and capable Petty
    Officer assigned. He has my complete confidence
    and is relied upon heavily for all vital network
    defense decisions for the USPACOM AOR.

54
Analyze
  • Ranked 1 of 5 outstanding Petty Officers!
    Perfect combination of technical excellence and
    deckplate leadership. Promote to E-8 NOW!

55
Analyze
  • Mature leader won't compromise standards,
    enforced highest USFLTFORCOM standards of conduct.

56
Analyze
  • Leads by example. Instituted a Mentorship Program
    which benefited more than 30 troops responsible
    for 100 retention and increased off-duty
    education by 50. Reinstated the Sailors Creed
    recital during quarters, embraced, ensured
    continued Navy tradition.

57
Analyze
  • Ensured his sailors were qualified in at least
    two positions--increased watch readiness!

58
Analyze
  • Managed 20 personnel workcenter in direct support
    of U.S. Pacific Command--exceeded all assigned
    goals!

59
Analyze
  • Demonstrated outstanding leadership skills as
    team chief increased productivity by 40

60
Community Involvement
  • Community, Command, or family??
  • Leader or participant
  • Frequency
  • Variety

61
Well Written Evaluations
  • Start Early
  • Complete Brag Sheet
  • Proofread
  • Validate
  • Ask for help/advise

62
Summary
  • Effective Writing
  • Paragraph Development
  • Passive Voice
  • Writing Errors
  • Written Communications
  • Awards
  • Evaluations
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