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Working With Parents Chapter 3

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Title: Working With Parents Chapter 3


1
Working With ParentsChapter 3
  • Perry C. Hanavan

2
Family
3
Family (origins)
  • It is worth noting that the word family
    originally meant a band of slaves. Even after the
    word came to apply to people affiliated by blood
    and marriage, for many centuries the notion of
    family referred to authority relations rather
    than love ones.
  • Stephanie Coontz, The Way We Never Were, pp. 43-44

4
More Definitions
  • Preparations for the 1980 White House Conference
    on the Family collapsed when representatives of
    the political left insisted that the word
    "families" should be used instead of "family" to
    acknowledge the vast diversity of American family
    types.
  • Webster's Dictionary offers twenty-two
    definitions.
  • The Census Bureau defines a family as "two or
    more persons related by birth, marriage or
    adoption who reside in the same household
  • --a definition selected by only 22 percent of a
    random sample of 1,200 adults in a 1990 survey
    conducted by Massachusetts Mutual Insurance
    Company.   

5
What Constitutes a Family?
  • Is family ultimately based on blood--hence an
    adopted son is a lesser son, and a stepfamily is
    a lesser family? 
  • In 1993, a Florida teenager who had, upon her
    birth, been sent home with the wrong family, did
    not want to go to her biological parents when the
    mistake had been uncovered. 
  • In the legal case that resulted, her lawyer began
    with the question "What constitutes a family?"
    and claimed that "biology alone--without
    more--does not constitute or sustain a family." 

6
Family
  • The family is the most stable component of any
    society.
  • If there is a bond among its membersthe family
    unit will survive.
  • As the provider for and socializer of children,
    the family has no match.

7
Family
  • Essence of family remains stabledespite changing
    world
  • Family members need permanent relationship with
    consistency, understanding and support

8
Family
  • The typical family two parents and children
    is NOT the average family in the U.S.

9
Consequences of Family Life
  • Between 1973 and 1981, Yankelovich found that
    about three-fourths of Americans interviewed
    claiming that family life was their most
    important value.
  • Studies of the various life spheres Americans
    report as being sources of a "great deal of
    satisfaction" consistently show family life being
    the most important.
  • Married individuals are healthier than their
    never-married, divorced, and widowed
    counterparts, according to the CDC report
    "Marital Status and Health United States,
    1999-2002." Marriage increases life-expectancy by
    as much as five years.

10
Consequences of Family Life
  • James Goodwin and his associates (Journal of the
    American Medical Association 2583125-3130) found
    in their analyses of 25,000 cases listed in the
    New Mexico Tumor Registry, which tracks all
    malignancies in the state, a higher percentage of
    married people survive cancer at nearly every age
  • In Lewis Terman's famous longitudinal study of
    gifted California children (n1,521), begun in
    1921 with follow-ups every 5 or 10 years, it was
    found that those whose parents divorced faced a
    33 percent greater risk of an earlier death
    (average age at death76 years) than those whose
    parents remained married until the children
    reached age 21 (average age at death80).
    According to Dr. Howard Friedman, who did the
    analyses, there was no such mortality effect for
    children whose parents had died (cited in Daniel
    Goleman. 1995. "75 Years Later, Study Is Still
    Tracking Geniuses." New York Times March 7).

11
What Teachers Need to Know
  • There is no typical family
  • Value families and their unique characteristics
    (culture, differences, etc.)
  • Empathize with families
  • Recognize their may be factors preventing parents
    from demonstrating good parenting skills (work,
    divorce, remarriage, stepfamilies, teen parents,
    poverty, violence, abuse, neglect, substance
    abuse, educational level, single parents, death
    of family members, moving, homelessness, illness,
    change of employment, etc.

12
Population Count
  • U.S. 292,653,625 World 6,350,175,142 2/23/04 at
    22250 PM EST
  • Latest U.S. population count
  • Latest World population count

13
Race
  • White. A person having origins in any of the
    original peoples of Europe, the Middle East, or
    North Africa. It includes people who indicate
    their race as "White" or report entries such as
    Irish, German, Italian, Lebanese, Near Easterner,
    Arab, or Polish.
  • Black or African American. A person having
    origins in any of the Black racial groups of
    Africa. It includes people who indicate their
    race as "Black, African Am., or Negro," or
    provide written entries such as African American,
    Afro American, Kenyan, Nigerian, or Haitian.
  • American Indian and Alaska Native. A person
    having origins in any of the original peoples of
    North and South America (including Central
    America) and who maintain tribal affiliation or
    community attachment.
  • Asian. A person having origins in any of the
    original peoples of the Far East, Southeast Asia,
    or the Indian subcontinent including, for
    example, Cambodia, China, India, Japan, Korea,
    Malaysia, Pakistan, the Philippine Islands,
    Thailand, and Vietnam. It includes "Asian
    Indian," "Chinese," "Filipino," "Korean,"
    "Japanese," "Vietnamese," and "Other Asian."
  • Native Hawaiian and Other Pacific Islander. A
    person having origins in any of the original
    peoples of Hawaii, Guam, Samoa, or other Pacific
    Islands. It includes people who indicate their
    race as "Native Hawaiian," "Guamanian or
    Chamorro," "Samoan," and "Other Pacific
    Islander."
  • Some other race. Includes all other responses not
    included in the "White", "Black or African
    American", "American Indian and Alaska Native",
    "Asian" and "Native Hawaiian and Other Pacific
    Islander" race categories described above.
    Respondents providing write-in entries such as
    multiracial, mixed, interracial, Wesort, or a
    Hispanic/Latino group (for example, Mexican,
    Puerto Rican, or Cuban) in the "Some other race"
    category are included here.
  • Two or more races. People may have chosen to
    provide two or more races either by checking two
    or more race response check boxes, by providing
    multiple write-in responses, or by some
    combination of check boxes and write-in responses.

14
Parenting Styles
  • First, parenting style is meant to describe
    normal variations in parenting. In other words,
    the parenting style typology Baumrind developed
    should not be understood to include deviant
    parenting, such as might be observed in abusive
    or neglectful homes.
  • Second, Baumrind assumes that normal parenting
    revolves around issues of control. Although
    parents may differ in how they try to control or
    socialize their children and the extent to which
    they do so, it is assumed that the primary role
    of all parents is to influence, teach, and
    control their children.

15
Parenting Styles
  • Parenting style captures two important elements
    of parenting
  • Parental responsiveness (also referred to as
    parental warmth or supportiveness) refers to "the
    extent to which parents intentionally foster
    individuality, self-regulation, and
    self-assertion by being attuned, supportive, and
    acquiescent to childrens special needs and
    demands.
  • Parental demandingness (also referred to as
    behavioral control) refers to "the claims parents
    make on children to become integrated into the
    family whole, by their maturity demands,
    supervision, disciplinary efforts and willingness
    to confront the child who disobeys"

16
Parent Styles
  • Indulgent parents (also referred to as
    "permissive" or "nondirective") "are more
    responsive than they are demanding. They are
    nontraditional and lenient, do not require mature
    behavior, allow considerable self-regulation, and
    avoid confrontation". Indulgent parents may be
    further divided into two types democratic
    parents, who, though lenient, are more
    conscientious, engaged, and committed to the
    child, and nondirective parents.
  • Children and adolescents from indulgent homes
    (high in responsiveness, low in demandingness)
    are more likely to be involved in problem
    behavior and perform less well in school, but
    they have higher self-esteem, better social
    skills, and lower levels of depression.

17
Parenting Styles
  • Authoritarian parents are highly demanding and
    directive, but not responsive. "They are
    obedience- and status-oriented, and expect their
    orders to be obeyed without explanation". These
    parents provide well-ordered and structured
    environments with clearly stated rules.
    Authoritarian parents can be divided into two
    types nonauthoritarian-directive, who are
    directive, but not intrusive or autocratic in
    their use of power, and authoritarian-directive,
    who are highly intrusive.
  • Children and adolescents from authoritarian
    families (high in demandingness, but low in
    responsiveness) tend to perform moderately well
    in school and be uninvolved in problem behavior,
    but they have poorer social skills, lower
    self-esteem, and higher levels of depression.

18
Parenting Styles
  • Authoritative parents are both demanding and
    responsive. "They monitor and impart clear
    standards for their childrens conduct. They are
    assertive, but not intrusive and restrictive.
    Their disciplinary methods are supportive, rather
    than punitive. They want their children to be
    assertive as well as socially responsible, and
    self-regulated as well as cooperative.
  • Children and adolescents whose parents are
    authoritative rate themselves and are rated by
    objective measures as more socially and
    instrumentally competent than those whose parents
    are nonauthoritative

19
Parenting Styles
  • Uninvolved parents are low in both responsiveness
    and demandingness. In extreme cases, this
    parenting style might encompass both
    rejectingneglecting and neglectful parents,
    although most parents of this type fall within
    the normal range.
  • Children and adolescents whose parents are
    uninvolved perform most poorly in all domains.

20
International Year of the Family UN Resolution
54/124
  • The objectives of the tenth anniversary of the
    Year (2004) would be to
  • (a)  Increase awareness of family issues among
    Governments as well as in the private sector
  • (b)  Strengthen the capacity of national
    institutions to formulate, implement and monitor
    policies in respect of families
  • (c)  Stimulate efforts to respond to problems
    affecting, and affected by, the situation of
    families
  • (d)  Undertake at all levels reviews and
    assessments of the situation and needs of
    families, identifying specific issues and
    problems
  • (e)  Enhance the effectiveness of local, national
    and regional efforts to carry out specific
    programmes concerning families, generate new
    activities and strengthen existing ones
  • (f)  Improve collaboration among national and
    international non-governmental organizations in
    support of families. 

21
Quote
  • A hundred years from now it will not matter what
    my bank account was, the sort of house I lived
    in, or the kind of car I drove... but the world
    may be different because I was important in the
    life of a child.

22
U.S. Family Trends
23
Family Systems Conceptual Framework
  • Family Characteristics
  • characteristics of the family
  • characteristics of individuals
  • special challenges

Inputs
Cohesion Adaptability
Family Interaction
Extended Family Marital Parental
Siblings
  • Family Life Cycle
  • developmental stages transitions
  • change in characteristics
  • change in functions

Process
Family Functions economics daily care
self-definition recreation affection socializat
ion education/vocational
Outputs
24
Family Forms
  • Married nuclear families both adults are the
    biological or adoptive parents of children.
  • the man works outside the home while the woman
    works inside the home caring for the children.
    According to the 1990 U.S. Census, 28 of all
    households fit this description.
  • the woman works outside the home and the man
    cares for the children. This constitutes 2 of
    the families in this country.
  • both the husband and the wife work outside the
    home or are income providers. In some situations,
    the woman might have a home-based business, such
    as a day care center. Nearly 60 of women with
    children under the age of six were in the
    workforce during the past decade.

25
Ecocultural Model
26
Family Forms
  • Single-parent families in this family there is
    only one parent in the home.
  • Due to high divorce rates and adults choosing not
    to marry, this is currently the fastest growing
    family form in America.
  • More than half of all children will spend some of
    their lives in a single-parent family.
  • This group includes unwed single teenage mothers.
    Currently, 88 percent of these families are
    headed by women.

27
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28
Family Forms
  • Step families these families are generally
    created by divorce and remarriage rather than by
    the death of the mother or father. In step
    families, biologically unrelated children often
    live in the same household. There are 9,000 new
    step families being created each week in this
    country.

29
Family Forms
  • Cohabitation families two unmarried adults who
    are committed to a long-term relationship and,
    sometimes, children from this union or from
    previous relationships are included. This can
    include heterosexual or homosexual partners.

30
Family Forms
  • Cross-generational family two or more adults
    from different generations of a family, who
    intend to share a household during the
    foreseeable future. This family type may include
    children. Sometimes children are raised by their
    grandparents when their biological parents have
    died or no longer can take care of them. The
    number of these families has increased by 40
    percent in the past ten years. In addition, many
    grandparents take some primary responsibility for
    child care, particularly when both parents work.

31
Family Forms
  • Joint/shared-custody families children are
    legally raised by both parents who are not living
    together. Generally, the children move back and
    forth between the residences of each parent,
    depending on the legal agreement between the
    parents.

32
Family Forms
  • Foster and group-home families often provide a
    substitute family for children referred by the
    courts or government agencies. While problems
    with their parents or guardians are being
    resolved, the children may live in these families.

33
Fathers
  • From breadwinner and moral guidance to a variety
    of roles
  • 1940s sex-role model
  • 1960s beginning of the retreat from fatherhood
  • 1970s nuturant father
  • 1990s MADDADS, Promise Keepers, National
    Centers for Fathering

34
Fatherless
  • Tonight, at least 28 of American children will
    go to sleep in a fatherless home. At least 60 of
    black American children are living apart from
    their biological fathers.
  • The number of children living apart from their
    dads has climbed from 5.1 million in 1960 to 16.9
    million in 1996.
  • 50 percent of all white children and 75 percent
    of all black children born in the last two
    decades are likely to live for some portion of
    their childhood with only their mothers.

35
Fatherless Data
  • 3 time more likely to fail at school
  • 2-3 times more likely to experience emotional or
    behavioral problems requiring psychiatric
    treatment
  • 3 times more likely to commit suicide as
    adolescents
  • 5 times more likely to be poor
  • 72 of adolescent murderers grew up without
    fathers.
  • 2 times more likely that a young male will engage
    in criminal activity

36
What Do You Think?
  • Write down 5 characteristics of the ideal father
  • Write down 5 characteristics of the ideal mother

37
What Do You Think?
  • List 5 things you can do as a teacher to involve
    fathers and father-substitutes in your classroom

38
What Do You Think?
  • What impact do you think divorce has on the child
    in your classroom?
  • What can you do when a child is experiencing
    divorce?
  • What about parent teacher conferences?
  • How can you best communicate with both parents?

39
Poverty in America
40
Poverty
  • Following the Office of Management and Budget's
    (OMB) Statistical Policy Directive 14, the Census
    Bureau uses a set of money income thresholds that
    vary by family size and composition to determine
    who is poor. If a family's total income is less
    than that family's threshold, then that family,
    and every individual in it, is considered poor.
    The poverty thresholds do not vary
    geographically, but they are updated annually for
    inflation using the Consumer Price Index (CPI-U).
  • The official poverty definition counts money
    income before taxes and does not include capital
    gains and noncash benefits (such as public
    housing, Medicaid, and food stamps).
  • Poverty is not defined for people in military
    barracks, institutional group quarters, or for
    unrelated individuals under age 15 (such as
    foster children). They are excluded from the
    poverty universe--that is, they are considered
    neither as "poor" nor as "nonpoor."

41
Poverty Example
  • Example Suppose Family A consists of five
    people two children, their mother, father, and
    great-aunt. Family A's poverty threshold in 2001
    was 21,665. Suppose also that each member had
    the following income in 2001
  • Mother 10,000 Father 5,000 Great-aunt 10,000
    First child 0 Second child 0 Total 25,000
  • Since their total family income, 25,000 was
    greater than their threshold (21,665), the
    family would not be considered "poor" according
    to the official poverty measure.

42
Census Data on Poverty
43
Poverty Rates by Age
44
Poverty Rates by Race
45
Poverty Rates in Families
46
Who is Homeless
  • According to the Stewart B. McKinney Act, 42
    U.S.C. 11301, et seq. (1994), a person is
    considered homeless who "lacks a fixed, regular,
    and adequate night-time residence and and... has
    a primary night time residency that is (A) a
    supervised publicly or privately operated shelter
    designed to provide temporary living
    accommodations... (B) an institution that
    provides a temporary residence for individuals
    intended to be institutionalized, or (C) a public
    or private place not designed for, or ordinarily
    used as, a regular sleeping accommodation for
    human beings." 42 U.S.C. 11302(a) The term
    "'homeless individual' does not include any
    individual imprisoned or otherwise detained
    pursuant to an Act of Congress or a state law."
    42 U.S.C. 11302(c)

47
Homeless Children
  • In 2001, the U.S. Conference of Mayors' survey of
    homelessness in 27 cities found that children
    under the age of 18 accounted for 25.3 of the
    urban homeless population (U.S. Conference of
    Mayors, 2001). This same study found that
    unaccompanied minors comprised 4 of the urban
    homeless population. However, in other cities and
    especially in rural areas, the numbers of
    children experiencing homelessness are much
    higher. On a national level, approximately 39 of
    the homeless population are children (Urban
    Institute 2000). A 1987 Urban Institute study
    found that 51 of the homeless population were
    between the ages of 31 and 50 (Burt, 1989) other
    studies have found percentages of homeless
    persons aged 55 to 60 ranging from 2.5 to 19.4
    (Institute of Medicine, 1988).

48
Homeless
  • Two trends are largely responsible for the rise
    in homelessness over the past 20-25 years
  • a growing shortage of affordable rental housing
    and
  • a simultaneous increase in poverty.

49
Homeless
  • Homelessness and poverty are inextricably linked.
  • Poor people are frequently unable to pay for
    housing, food, child care, health care, and
    education.
  • Difficult choices must be made when limited
    resources cover only some of these necessities.
  • Often it is housing, which absorbs a high
    proportion of income, that must be dropped.
  • Being poor means being an illness, an accident,
    or a paycheck away from living on the streets.

50
"Through Our Own Eyes"
  • Last year Sioux Falls School District's Homeless
    Education Program organized a two-week program
    for homeless children. Eight homeless children
    were paired with four professional photographers
    who taught the children the fundamentals of
    taking pictures. The children where then sent out
    to capture events and images of their daily
    lives. The project, entitled "Through Our Own
    Eyes," not only helped the children to create
    photographic bibliographies, it also exposed the
    children to print development and the business of
    photography. Photography from the project has
    been exhibited at the Sioux Falls Civic Fine Arts
    Center and is available for exhibits elsewhere.
    In addition, the photographs were made into
    notecards (such as those featured in this issue
    of Safety Network) and are available for purchase
    as a fund-raiser for the Homeless Education
    Program. Notecards are available in sets of 12
    for 10.00 from the Center for Western Studies,
    Augustana College, Box 727, Sioux Falls, SD
    57197 605/336-4007, 605/336-4999 (fax). For more
    information about the project, contact Marilyn
    Charging or Wendy Giebink at the Homeless
    Education Project, c/o Edison Middle School, 2101
    Southwest Avenue, Sioux Falls, SD 57105,
    605/367-4282.

51
Diversity
  • Each person's map of the world is as unique as
    the person's thumbprint. There are no two people
    alike. No two people who understand the same
    sentence the same way .  .  . So in dealing with
    people, you try not to fit them to your concept
    of what they should be. -- MILTON ERICKSON

52
Diversity in America
53
  • Census info

54
Cultural Diversity
  • We are distinguished and united by differences
    and similarities according to gender, age,
    language, culture, race, sexual identity, and
    income level--just to name a few.
  • Such diversity challenges our intellect and
    emotions as we learn to work and live together in
    harmony.

55
What do you think?
  • What can we do to involve all families of
    diversity in our schools?

56
Out of Wedlock Births
  • In 1940, only 3.8 percent of American women were
    not married when they gave birth. By 1994, that
    rate had climbed to 32.6 percent.
  • Almost 1 in 5 children are born to unmarried
    mothers
  • 1 in 5 young females with below average academic
    skills who lives in a below poverty level home
    becomes a mother while still a teenager
    regardless of race.
  • In eight of America's 40 largest cities,
    unmarried women give birth to more than 3 out of
    every 5 children - roughly twice the national
    average. This occurs in poor urban areas already
    struggling with other social and economic
    problems. (In Baltimore More than 3 out of 4
    residents who gave birth there in the past 12
    months were unmarried, according to census
    estimates.)

57
Unmarried Childbearing(Data are for U.S. in 2002)
  • Number of live births to unmarried women
    1,365,966
  • Birth rate for unmarried women 43.7 births per
    1,000 unmarried women aged 15-44 years
  • Percent of all births to unmarried women 34.0  

58
Out-of-Wedlock Births
59
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60
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61
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62
Need More Programs
  • Few states or cities have focused on women in
    their twenties. Addressing young mothers in
    Hamilton County, Tenn., which includes
    Chattanooga
  • Four years into its comprehensive family and
    marriage-strengthening program, the First Things
    First initiative reduce divorce filings by 20
    percent and out-of-wedlock pregnancies by 16
    percent.

63
Marriage
  • "The State of Our UnionsThe Social Health of
    Marriage in America." study was published by the
    National Marriage Project at Rutgers University
    (1999)
  • "Key social indicators suggest a substantial
    weakening of the institution of marriage.
    Americans have become less likely to marry. When
    they do marry, their marriages are less happy.
    And married couples face a high likelihood of
    divorce. Over the past four decades, marriage
    has declined as the first living together
    experience for couples and as a status of
    parenthood. Unmarried cohabitation and unwed
    births have grown enormously, and so has the
    percentage of children who grow up in fragile
    families.

64
Rutgers Study Continued
  • "As an adult stage in life course, marriage is
    shrinking. Americans are living longer, marrying
    later, exiting marriage more quickly, and
    choosing to live together before marriage, after
    marriage, in between marriages, and as an
    alternative to marriage. A small but growing
    percentage of American adults will never marry.
    As a consequence, marriage is surrounded by
    longer periods of partnered or unpartnered
    singlehood over the course of a lifetime."

65
Rutgers Study Continued
  • "Among young women, social confidence in marriage
    is wavering. Until very recently, young women
    were highly optimistic about their chances for
    marital happiness and success. Now, according to
    youth surveys, their confidence in their ability
    to achieve successful marriage is declining.
    Moreover, they are notably more accepting of
    alternatives to marriage, such as unwed
    parenthood and cohabitation."

66
Marriage Stats
  • Since 1970 there has been a decline of more than
    one-third in the annual number of marriages per
    1,000 women.
  • The percentage of adults in the population at any
    one time who are married has also diminished.
    However, the number of unmarried cohabitating
    couples continue to increase (865 since 1960)
  • The number of intact married couples who rate
    their marriage as "very happy" has decreased. (In
    1973, 67.4 percent said their marriages were
    "very happy." That percentage decreased to 61.9
    percent in 1996.) It has been estimated that
    after ten years only 25 percent of first
    marriages are successful
  • The average median age for marriage is the
    highest in American history. It presently stands
    at 27 for men and 25 for women.
  • The percentage of adults who are presently
    divorced has quadrupled since 1960.
  • The percentage of children in single-parent
    families has risen from 9 in 1960 to 28 in
    1998. Thirty-five percent of children now live
    apart from their biological fathers
  • The percentage of teenage boys and girls who said
    that having a good marriage and family life was
    "extremely important" has increased. For girls,
    this percentage has increased from 80.2 percent
    in 1980 to 83.1 percent in 1995. For boys, the
    percentage has increased from 69.4 percent in
    1980 to 72.9 percent in 1995. The percentage of
    teens who have accepted cohabitation and
    out-of-wedlock childbearing has increased. In
    1980, only 32.3 of girls felt that cohabitation
    was a good idea. The figure now stands at 54.6
    percent.18 In 1980, 44.9 of boys felt
    cohabitation was a acceptable, compared with 62
    now. More than 50 of teenagers state that
    out-of-wedlock childbearing is now a "worthwhile
    lifestyle."
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