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The Writers World: Paragraphs and Essays

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Students in my psychology class listened to the instructor, took notes, and ... important questions, ended in astonishing results, and gave valuable insight ... – PowerPoint PPT presentation

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Title: The Writers World: Paragraphs and Essays


1
The Writers World Paragraphs and Essays
  • Part IV Editing Handbook
  • Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel
    Structure

2
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructurePractice 1
Exercise Underline the parallel items all
sentences have parallel structures.
  • Example Students in my psychology class
    listened to the instructor, took notes,
    and asked questions.
  • Students in my psychology class listened
    to the instructor, took notes, and asked
    questions.

3
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructurePractice 1
Underline the parallel items all sentences have
parallel structures.
  • 1. Professor Stanley Milgram taught at Yale,
    conducted a famous experiment, and wrote a book
    about his research.
  • 1. Professor Stanley Milgram taught at Yale,
    conducted a famous experiment, and wrote a book
    about his research.
  • 2. Milgrams experiment was controversial,
    provocative, and surprising.
  • 2. Milgrams experiment was controversial,
    provocative, and surprising.

4
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructurePractice 1
Underline the parallel items all sentences have
parallel structures.
  • 3. His experiment tried to understand how humans
    reacted to authority, how they obeyed authority,
    and how they felt about authority.
  • 3. His experiment tried to understand how humans
    reacted to authority, how they obeyed authority,
    and how they felt about authority.
  • 4. For his experiment, Milgram used one actor in
    a lab coat, one actor with glasses, and one
    unsuspecting subject in street clothes.
  • 4. For his experiment, Milgram used one actor in
    a lab coat, one actor with glasses, and one
    unsuspecting subject in street clothes.

5
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructurePractice 1
Underline the parallel items all sentences have
parallel structures.
  • 5. The psychologist told the subject to sit at
    the desk, to watch the patient behind the
    glass, and to listen to the experiment leader.
  • 5. The psychologist told the subject to sit at
    the desk, to watch the patient behind the
    glass, and to listen to the experiment leader.
  • 6. The leader told the subject when to start
    electric shocks, when to increase the level of
    shocks, and when to stop the experiment.
  • 6. The leader told the subject when to start
    electric shocks, when to increase the level of
    shocks, and when to stop the experiment.

6
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructurePractice 1
Underline the parallel items all sentences have
parallel structures.
  • 7. Milgrams experiment raised important
    questions, ended in astonishing results, and gave
    valuable insight into human behavior.
  • 7. Milgrams experiment raised important
    questions, ended in astonishing results, and gave
    valuable insight into human behavior.
  • 8. Psychologists continue to perform
    experiments, give lectures, and debate issues.
  • 8. Psychologists continue to perform
    experiments, give lectures, and debate issues.

7
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructurePractice 2
Example Correct the faulty parallel structure in
each sentence.
  • Example Some psychology experiments are bold,
    pioneering, and show their originality.
  • Some psychology experiments are bold,
    pioneering, and original.

8
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructurePractice 2
Correct the faulty parallel structure in each
sentence.
  • 1. Ivan Pavlov was a Russian physiologist, a
    research scientist, and he won a Nobel prize.
  • 1. Ivan Pavlov was a Russian physiologist, a
    research scientist, and a Nobel Prize winner.
  • 2. Pavlov became interested in dog salivation,
    and digestion also interested him.
  • 2. Pavlov became interested in dog salivation and
    digestion.

9
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructurePractice 2
Correct the faulty parallel structure in each
sentence.
  • 3. To get to his lab, Pavlov walked through the
    door, up the stairs, and the department is where
    he entered.
  • 3. To get to his lab, Pavlov walked through the
    door, up the stairs, and into the department.
  • 4. Pavlov used many sound-making devices to
    stimulate his dogs, such as metronomes, whistles,
    and he also used tuning forks.
  • 4. Pavlov used many sound-making devices to
    stimulate his dogs, such as metronomes, whistles,
    and tuning forks.

10
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructurePractice 2
Correct the faulty parallel structure in each
sentence.
  • 5. Pavlov noticed that the dogs heard the noise,
    saw the food dish, and were salivating.
  • 5. Pavlov noticed that the dogs heard the noise,
    saw the food dish, and salivated.
  • 6. Some of the dogs were excited, nervous, and
    expressed enthusiasm.
  • 6. Some of the dogs were excited, nervous, and
    enthusiastic.

11
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructurePractice 2
Correct the faulty parallel structure in each
sentence.
  • 7. Western scientists found Pavlovs experiments
    to be astounding, innovative, and thought they
    were important.
  • 7. Western scientists found Pavlovs experiments
    to be astounding, innovative, and important.
  • 8. Ivan Pavlov worked quickly, and he was very
    efficient.
  • 8. Ivan Pavlov worked quickly and efficiently.

12
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructurePractice 3
Example Correct the faulty parallel structure.
  • Example Philip Zimbardo is creative and an
    interesting person.
  • Philip Zimbardo is creative and
    interesting.

13
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructurePractice 3
Correct the faulty parallel structure.
  • 1. Philip Zimbardo created an experiment that
    was both unique and startled others. The Stanford
    Prison Experiment examined how ordinary people
    would react when placed in positions of power. He
    chose twenty-four students who were healthy,
    stable, and they abided the law. Each subject
    would be either a guard or prisoner for a
    two-week period.

14
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructurePractice 3
Correct the faulty parallel structure.Parallel
errors are underlined on the left. The
corrections are underlined on the right.
  • 1. Philip Zimbardo created an experiment that
    was both unique and startled others. The Stanford
    Prison Experiment examined how ordinary people
    would react when placed in positions of power. He
    chose twenty-four students who were healthy,
    stable, and they abided the law. Each subject
    would be either a guard or prisoner for a
    two-week period.
  • Philip Zimbardo created an experiment that was
    both unique and startling.
  • He chose twenty-four students who were healthy,
    stable, and law-abiding.

15
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructurePractice 3
Correct the faulty parallel structure.
  • 2. On the first day of the experiment, each
    guard was told to wear a uniform, carry a baton,
    and sunglasses were put on. Ordinary people who
    had committed no crime, who had broken no laws,
    and been honest were placed in a cold room. The
    prisoners were not only arrested but the guards
    also deloused them.

16
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructurePractice 3
Correct the faulty parallel structure.Parallel
errors are underlined on the left. The
corrections are underlined on the right.
  • 2. On the first day of the experiment, each
    guard was told to wear a uniform, carry a baton,
    and sunglasses were put on. Ordinary people who
    had committed no crime, who had broken no laws,
    and been honest were placed in a cold room. The
    prisoners were not only arrested but the guards
    also deloused them.
  • On the first day of the experiment, each guard
    was told to wear a uniform, carry a baton, and
    wear sunglasses.
  • Ordinary people who had committed no crime, who
    had broken no laws, and who had been honest were
    placed in a cold room.

17
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructurePractice 3
Correct the faulty parallel structure.
  • 3. Immediately, the experiments observed
    shocking behavior. Some of the guards started to
    act controlling, sadistic, and they abused the
    prisoners. On the second day, the prisoners
    rioted and the guards attacked. Some prisoners
    decided that they would rather leave than
    continue with the experiment.

18
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructurePractice 3
Correct the faulty parallel structure.Parallel
errors are underlined on the left. The
corrections are underlined on the right.
  • 3. Immediately, the experiments observed
    shocking behavior. Some of the guards started to
    act controlling, sadistic, and they abused the
    prisoners. On the second day, the prisoners
    rioted and the guards attacked. Some prisoners
    decided that they would rather leave than
    continuing with the experiment.
  • Some of the guards started to act controlling,
    sadistic, and abusive.
  • Some prisoners decided that they would rather
    leave than continue with the experiment.

19
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructurePractice 3
Correct the faulty parallel structure.
  • 4. Many psychologists have studied the
    phenomenon of bystander apathy, and the results
    have been published by them. There are many
    reasons a bystander may not help someone in
    trouble. Bystanders may not want to risk their
    own lives, they may not have the skills to help
    in an emergency, or legal problems could be
    incurred. In addition, many people do not want to
    look stupid or be seen as being foolish if there
    is no real emergency. Psychologists believe that
    these are only some possible reasons for
    bystander apathy.

20
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructurePractice 3
Correct the faulty parallel structure. Parallel
errors are underlined on the left. The
corrections are underlined on the right.
  • 4. Many psychologists have studied the
    phenomenon of bystander apathy, and the results
    have been published by them. There are many
    reasons a bystander may not help someone in
    trouble. Bystanders may not want to risk their
    own lives, they may not have the skills to help
    in an emergency, or legal problems could be
    incurred. In addition, many people do not want to
    look stupid or be seen as being foolish if there
    is no real emergency. Psychologists believe that
    these are only some possible reasons for
    bystander apathy.
  • Many psychologists have studied the phenomenon
    of bystander apathy and have published their
    results.
  • Bystanders may not want to risk their own lives,
    they may not have the skills to help in an
    emergency, or they may worry about legal
    problems.

21
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructurePractice 4
Example Write sentences using parallel structure.
  • Example Information about bystander apathy is
    surprising and of interest.
  • Information about bystander apathy is
    surprising and interesting.

22
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructurePractice 4
Write sentences using parallel structure.
  • 1. Parallel nouns
  • 1. Popcorn, potato chips, and cupcakes are his
    favorite snacks.
  • 2. Parallel verbs
  • 2. We climbed the hill, admired the view, and
    then returned home.

23
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructurePractice 4
Write sentences using parallel structure.
  • 3. Parallel adjectives
  • 3. The students essay was interesting, engaging,
    and convincing.
  • 4. Parallel who phrases
  • 4. The children who play at the beach and the
    children who play at the park all need to use
    sunscreen.

24
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructureFinal
Review Example Correct errors in parallel
construction.
  • Example Psychiatrists, psychologists, and
    other people who are counselors help
    patients deal with their mental health
    problems.
  • Psychiatrists, psychologists, and
    counselors help patients deal with their
    mental health problems.

25
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructureFinal
Review Correct errors in parallel construction.
  • 1. In 1972, psychologist David Rosenhan was
    young, intelligent, and had enthusiasm. He asked
    eight of his friends to participate in a
    psychology experiment. There were some
    psychologists, a pediatrician, a psychiatrist, a
    man who was a painter, a homemaker, and a
    graduate student. Rosenhan told the participants
    that for five days they had to stop showering,
    they had to look unclean, and they were wearing
    old clothes.

26
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructureFinal
Review Correct errors in parallel
construction.Parallel errors are underlined on
the left. The corrections are underlined on the
right.
  • 1. In 1972, psychologist David Rosenhan was
    young, intelligent, and had enthusiasm. He asked
    eight of his friends to participate in a
    psychology experiment. There were some
    psychologists, a pediatrician, a psychiatrist, a
    man who was a painter, a homemaker, and a
    graduate student. Rosenhan told the participants
    that for five days they had to stop showering,
    they had to look unclean, and they were wearing
    old clothes.
  • In 1972, psychologist David Rosenhan was young,
    intelligent, and enthusiastic.
  • There were some psychologists, a pediatrician, a
    psychiatrist, a painter, a homemaker, and a
    graduate student.
  • Rosenhan told the participants that for five
    days they had to stop showering, they had to look
    unclean, and they had to wear old clothes.

27
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructureFinal
Review Correct errors in parallel construction.
  • 1. At the end of the fifth day, the participants
    traveled to different parts of the country and
    entered various psychiatric hospital emergency
    rooms. The psychiatric hospitals were either
    private and expensive or public and they cost
    very little. The participants told the admitting
    psychiatrists that they heard voices. They told
    the truth about everything else in their lives.

28
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructureFinal
Review Correct errors in parallel
construction.Parallel errors are underlined on
the left. The corrections are underlined on the
right.
  • 1. At the end of the fifth day, the participants
    traveled to different parts of the country and
    entered various psychiatric hospital emergency
    rooms. The psychiatric hospitals were either
    private and expensive or public and they cost
    very little. The participants told the admitting
    psychiatrists that they heard voices. They told
    the truth about everything else in their lives.
  • The psychiatric hospitals were either private
    and expensive or public and cheap.

29
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructureFinal
Review Correct errors in parallel construction.
  • 2. Psychiatrists looked for and were finding
    serious psychological illnesses in the patients.
    They diagnosed all eight patients from eight to
    fifty-eight days. Rosenhans experiment showed
    that psychiatric evaluation had to be both
    stringent and have no bias.

30
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructureFinal
Review Correct errors in parallel
construction.Parallel errors are underlined on
the left. The corrections are underlined on the
right.
  • 2. Psychiatrists looked for and were finding
    serious psychological illnesses in the patients.
    They diagnosed all eight patients from eight to
    fifty-eight days. Rosenhans experiment showed
    that psychiatric evaluation had to be both
    stringent and have no bias.
  • Psychiatrists looked for and found serious
    psychological illnesses in the patients.
  • Rosenhans experiment showed that psychiatric
    evaluation had to be both stringent and unbiased.

31
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructureFinal
Review Correct errors in parallel construction.
  • 3. Lauren Slater is a researcher, psychologist,
    and she writes. In 2003, she decided to reenact
    Rosenhans experiment to see if assessment
    methods in psychiatry had changed. She became the
    guinea pig in her own experiment. Like
    Rosenhans friends, she looked scruffy, she
    visited different psychiatric institutions, and
    she was telling the psychiatrists about voices in
    her head.

32
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructureFinal
Review Correct errors in parallel
construction.Parallel errors are underlined on
the left. The corrections are underlined on the
right.
  • 3. Lauren Slater is a researcher, psychologist,
    and she writes. In 2003, she decided to reenact
    Rosenhans experiment to see if assessment
    methods in psychiatry had changed. She became the
    guinea pig in her own experiment. Like Rosehans
    friends, she looked scruffy, she visited
    different psychiatric institutions, and she was
    telling the psychiatrists about voices in her
    head.
  • Lauren Slater is a researcher, psychologist, and
    writer.
  • Like Rosenhans friends, she looked scruffy, she
    visited different psychiatric institutions, and
    she told the psychiatrists about voices in her
    head.

33
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructureFinal
Review Correct errors in parallel construction.
Parallel errors are underlined on the left. On
the right are the corrected sentences.
  • 3. Psychiatrists asked her neither about her
    religious beliefs, or was she asked anything
    about her cultural background. The examining
    psychiatrists asked her some general questions,
    took her temperature, and she was diagnosed by
    them with depression.

34
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructureFinal
Review Correct errors in parallel
construction.Parallel errors are underlined on
the left. The corrections are underlined on the
right.
  • 3. Psychiatrists asked her neither about her
    religious beliefs, nor was she asked anything
    about her cultural background. The examining
    psychiatrists asked her some general questions,
    took her temperature, and she was diagnosed by
    them with depression.
  • Psychiatrists asked her neither about her
    religious beliefs, nor about her cultural
    background.
  • The examining psychiatrists asked her some
    general questions, took her temperature, and
    diagnosed her with depression.

35
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructureFinal
Review Correct errors in parallel construction.
  • 4. Slater knew she did not really suffer from
    depression because she had asked her real doctor,
    her family, and her people who were her friends
    to assess her mental state. Unlike the
    psychiatrists in Rosenhams experiment, Slaters
    psychiatrists did not admit her to their
    hospitals, but they all prescribed antipsychotic
    and antidepressant drugs for her. She wrote about
    her experiences in her book Opening Skinners
    Box. Her book is well written and it is of
    interest.

36
Chapter 21 Faulty Parallel StructureFinal
Review Correct errors in parallel
construction.Parallel errors are underlined on
the left. The corrections are underlined on the
right.
  • 4. Slater knew she did not really suffer from
    depression because she had asked her real doctor,
    her family, and her people who were her friends
    to assess her mental state. Unlike the
    psychiatrists in Rosenhams experiment, Slaters
    psychiatrists did not admit her to their
    hospitals, but they all prescribed antipsychotic
    and antidepressant drugs for her. She wrote about
    her experiences in her book Opening Skinners
    Box. Her book is well written and it is of
    interest.
  • Slater knew she did not really suffer from
    depression because she had asked her real doctor,
    her family, and friends to assess her mental
    state.
  • Her book is well written and interesting.
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