Influencing Skills

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Influencing Skills
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today's aim and objective

• The Ipswich Insurance Institute is providing
  high quality, relevant training for the
  continuous development of its active membership
• You each take away two ideas that you can deploy
  before Easter

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radius 360 ltd
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An insight into Influencing

• How are we influenced?
• Dr. Robert Cialdinis - Six Principles of
  Influence

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Six Principles of Influence

• Seminal work of Dr. Robert Cialdini
• Book Influence The Psychology of Persuasion
• Explains the six psychological principles that
  drive our powerful impulse to comply to the
  pressures of others
• It also explains how we can avoid being
  manipulated or unconsciously manipulating others

The materials in Cialdini's Influence is a
proverbial gold mine Journal of Social and
Clinical Psychology
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Cialdinis 6 Principles of Influencing

• Reciprocity
• Consistency
• Social Proof
• Liking
• Authority
• Scarcity

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1 Reciprocation

• One person is required to repay in kind what
  another person has provided
• One good turn deserves another

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2 Consistency

• Most people have a desire to look and be
  consistent with their words, beliefs, attitudes
  and deeds because
• Good personal consistency is highly valued by
  society
• Consistent behaviour provides beneficial approach
  to daily life
• Doing what you said you would do

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3 Social Proof

• People often decide what to do or believe in a
  certain situation by looking at what other people
  are doing and believing
• its the way things are done around here

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4 Liking

• People prefer to say YES to those they know and
  like
• I like you so.why not!

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5 Authority

• People have a deep-seated obedience and
  compliance towards requests from authority

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6 Scarcity

• According to the scarcity principle, people
  assign more value to opportunities when they are
  less available

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Influencing Others - Activity
Working in small groups discuss how you could
each influence a colleague using one of
Cialdinis six principles

• Reciprocity
• Consistency
• Social Proof
• Liking
• Authority
• Scarcity

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Networking

• Have a purpose
• Introduce yourself clearly
• Use a memory stack to prime conversation
• Learn about people by asking questions
• Have your 30 elevator speech ready
• Listen actively
• Use Cialdinis principle of reciprocity
• Try not to stay in the same place too long
• Be prepared to follow up

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Memory stack
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Elevator speeches
Pain customer discomfort Premise how you
might help People Britain's got talent Proof
where you've succeeded Purpose what should
happen next
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Describing and influencing Conflict
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Consider your response to conflict

• Turn to the person next to you and discuss a
  recent, specific conflict situation explaining
• How assertive was I? How actively do I work to
  satisfy my own needs and concerns?
• How cooperative was I? How actively do I work to
  satisfy the other persons needs and concerns?

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Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Model.

• 5 key responses to conflict
• Competing
• Collaborating
• Compromising
• Avoiding
• Accommodating

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Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Model
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Competing

• Competing is assertive and uncooperative
• An individual pursues their own concerns at the
  other persons expense
• This is a power-oriented mode, in which one uses
  whatever power seems appropriate to win ones own
  positionones ability to argue, ones rank,
  economic sanctions
• Competing might mean standing up for your
  rights, defending a position which you believe
  is correct, or simply trying to win

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Accommodating

• Accommodating is unassertive and cooperative -
  the opposite of competing
• When accommodating, an individual neglects their
  own concerns to satisfy the concerns of the other
  person
• There is an element of self-sacrifice
• Accommodating might take the form of selfless
  generosity or charity, obeying another persons
  order when one would prefer not to, or yielding
  to anothers point of view

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Avoiding

• Avoiding is unassertive and uncooperative
• The Individual does not immediately pursue their
  own concerns or those of the other person
• They do not address the conflict
• Avoiding might take the form of diplomatically
  sidestepping an issue, postponing an issue until
  a better time, or simply withdrawing from a
  threatening situation

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Collaborating

• Collaborating is both assertive and cooperative
  the opposite of avoiding
• Collaborating involves an attempt to work with
  the other person to find some solution which
  fully satisfies the concerns of both persons
• It means digging into an issue to identify the
  underlying concerns of the two individuals and to
  find an alternative which meets both sets of
  concerns
• Collaborating between two persons might take the
  form of exploring a disagreement to learn from
  each others insights, concluding to resolve some
  condition which would otherwise have them
  competing for resources, or confronting and
  trying to find a creative solution to an
  interpersonal problem

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Compromising

• Compromising is intermediate in both
  assertiveness and cooperativeness
• The objective is to find some expedient, mutually
  acceptable solution which partially satisfies
  both parties
• It falls on a middle ground between competing and
  accommodating
• Compromising gives up more than competing but
  less than accommodating
• Likewise, it addresses an issue more directly
  than avoiding, but does not explore it in as much
  depth as collaborating
• Compromising might mean splitting the difference,
  exchanging concessions, or seeking a quick
  middle-ground position

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Reflective review

• In groups discuss and identify stories from
  the news that demonstrate one or more of the 5
  levels of conflict
• Competing is assertive and uncooperative
• Collaborating is both assertive and cooperative
• Compromising is intermediate in both
  assertiveness and cooperativeness
• Avoiding is unassertive and uncooperative
• Accommodating is unassertive and cooperative

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Reasons for Competing (Aggression) in Conflict

• You want to engage in quick, decisive action.
• You have to deal with an emergency.
• You are responsible for enforcing unpopular rules
  or discipline.
• You see the issues as vital and know you are
  right.
• You need to protect yourself against people who
  take advantage of collaborative behaviour.
• (Source Cloke, K. Goldsmith, J.
  Resolving Conflicts at Work)

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Reasons for collaborating or using teamwork to
resolve the conflict

• You believe it is possible to reach an
  integrative solution even though both sides find
  it hard to compromise.
• Your objective is to learn.
• You believe it is preferable to merge the
  insights that come from different perspectives.
• You need a long-range solution.
• You want to gain commitment and increase
  motivation and productivity by using consensus
  decision-making.
• You want to empower one or both participants.
• You see it as a way to work through hard feelings
  and improve moral.
• You nee to help people learn to work closely
  together.
• You want to end the conflict rather than put
  paper over it.
• Your goals require a team effort.
• You need creative solutions.
• Youve tried everything else without success.

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Reasons for Compromise

• You goals are moderately important but can be
  satisfied by less than total agreement.
• Your opponents have equal power and you are
  strongly committed to mutually exclusive goals.
• You need to achieve a temporary settlement of
  complex issues.
• You need a quick solution and the exact content
  doesnt matter as much as the speed with which it
  is reached.
• Your effort at competition or collaboration has
  failed, and you need a backup.

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Reasons for Avoiding the conflict

• You regard the issue as trivial.
• You have no power over the issue or cant change
  the results.
• You believe damage due to conflict outweighs the
  benefits.
• You need to cool down, reduce tensions, or regain
  composure.
• You need time to gather information and cant
  make an immediate decision.
• You can leave it to others who are in a position
  to resolve the conflict more effectively.
• You regard the issue as tangential or symptomatic
  and prefer to wait to address the real problem.

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Reasons for Accommodating or giving in to the
conflict

• You realise you were wrong or want to show you
  can be reasonable.
• You recognise that the issue is more important to
  others and want to establish good will.
• You are outmatched or losing and giving in will
  prevent additional damage.
• You want harmony to be preserved or disruption
  avoided.
• You see an opportunity to help a subordinate
  learn from a mistake.

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Objective two ideas you can deploy

• Influence with reciprocity
• Influence with consistency
• Influence with social Proof
• Influence with liking
• Influence with authority
• Influence with scarcity
• Actively network
• Use memory stacking
• Create an elevator speech
• Be more assertive
• Be more cooperative