Marriage in America Real Problems and Practical Solutions

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Marriage in AmericaReal Problems and Practical
Solutions

• Salah Soltan
• June 2, 2005
• Presentation for Class 094
• Prof. Melva Schottenstein
• CSCC

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Introduction Importance of marriage between men
and women

• God created everything in pairs
• Adam and Eve
• All of creation
• Humans God created human beings as males and
  females
• Animals God created animals in the same way as
  mates
• Plants God even created plants in males and
  females
• Electricity positive and negative (e.g. Car
  battery)
• Magnetism Opposites attract
• Pairs complement one another

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Introduction Importance of marriage between men
and women
And of every thing We have created pairs That
ye may receive instruction. (Quran 5149)
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I. Goals of Marriage
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I. Goals of Marriage

• Tranquility, comfort, and affection.
• This is the foundation upon which the goals are
  built.
• Intimacy
• Giving birth and raising good children
• Social cohesion Marriage to strengthen bonds
  between extended families

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II. Marriage Problems in America
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II. Marriage Problems in America

1. Lack of marriage
2. Divorce and abuse
3. Intimacy problems
4. Problems with children
5. Extended family problems

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1. Lack of Marriage
Dramatic increase from 1970 to 2002
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1. Lack of Marriage

• More and more people are deciding not to get
  married.
• In 2003, there were 7.5 marriages per 1000 people

Age 1970 1999 2000 2002
Male        
 20 to 24 yrs 35.8 83.2 83.7 85.4
 25 to 29 yrs 10.5 52.1 51.7 53.7
 30 to 34 yrs 6.2 30.7 30.0 34.0
 35 to 39 yrs 5.4 21.1 20.3 21.1
 40 to 44 yrs 4.9 15.8 15.7 16.7
Female        
 20 to 24 yrs 54.7 72.3 72.8 74.0
 25 to 29 yrs 19.1 38.9 38.9 40.4
 30 to 34 yrs 9.4 22.1 21.9 23.0
 35 to 39 yrs 7.2 15.2 14.3 14.7
 40 to 44 yrs 6.3 10.9 11.8 11.5
Put reference here
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2. Divorce and Abuse

• 50 of marriages in America end in divorce
• 33 of adult women have been abused
• Every day, an average of 3 women are killed by
  husbands or boyfriends

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3. Intimacy Problems

• For modesty reasons, I am not going to talk about
  this issue but it is one that many people have
  problems with. It has a big effect on happiness
  in marriage.

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4. Problems for Children

• One in three children is born to unmarried
  parents
• 50 of children will live in single-parent
  families

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5. Extended Family Problems

• New England Journal of Medicine indicated that
  52 of all women and 33 of all men who are now
  65 will spend their last years in a nursing home.

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III. Specific Problems
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III. Specific Problems Muslim Community
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III. Specific Problems
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IV. Practical Solutions
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IV. Practical Solutions

1. General Solutions
2. Specific Solutions

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1. General Solutions

• Take guidance from the divine revelation
• God created and has the right to command

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1. General Solutions

• Revive the understanding of the complimentary
  roles of husbands and wives

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1. General Solutions

• Flexibility with jobs. Especially of the wife
• Society should put family ahead of work
• Employers should give more time off for women who
  have babies
• Adoption of social programs for supporting
  pregnant women and new mothers as done in Germany
  and France
• Giving women their rights as mothers not only as
  employees

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Three Keys

• Love in the heart
• Reaching a common understanding
• Harmony in intimacy

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Conclusion

• There is a crisis today in American family life
  and we need to work hard to fix both general
  society and individual families to achieve the
  goals of marriage Love, understanding, good
  kids, and a strong society

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References

• The Holy Quran (www.quran.net)
• US Census Bureau (www.census.gov)
• Bureau of Justice Statistics Selected Findings
• American Bar Association (www.abanet.org)
• Womens Educational Media (www.womedia.org)
• Errold F. Moody Jr (www.efmoody.com)