Pastoral Care with Children

1
Pastoral Care with Children

• From
• Andrew D. Lester. Pastoral Care with Children in
  Crisis. Philadelphia Westminster, 1985.

2
Causes for Neglect of Children by Pastors

• 1) Childhood is idealized
• 2) Indirect communication (play)
• 3) Faulty assumption that children are not aware
  of what is going on
• 4) Belief that children are adaptable with no
  vulnerabilities
• 5) Seeing children as parents responsibility
  alone
• 6) Avoiding suspicion of child abuse/molestation
• 7) Seeing children as non-contributors
• 8) Childcare stereo-typed as womans work
• 9) Lack of training
• 10) Sense of inadequacy
• Peer pressure (work with children seen as
  immature)

3
What Children in Crisis Need from the Pastor

• Accurate Empathy, Non-Possessive Warmth,
  Inherent Genuineness
• 1) Foster childs competency to deal with crisis
• 2) Modeling of godly attitudes values
• 3) Truthfulness (confirmation of their
  perceptions)
• 4) Foster the sense of belonging
• 5) Adult friends
• 6) Someone to LISTEN
• 7) Someone to accept their feelings
• 8) Spiritual guidance
• 9) Unconditional love

4
Children Things to Know

• Adoptees and step-children are more likely to be
  seen in counseling grief/loss/anger
• Children can become the symptom-bearers for the
  marriage or family
• Takes 3-5 years for most step-family members to
  achieve a sense of belonging
• Suicide among children gtgtgtgt

5
Suicide Among Children

• Males commit 41 over girls
• Females attempt 31 over boys
• Methods Males - guns, hanging (4-6 year olds)
  Females - drugs, CO poisoning, jump
• Time of Year Beginning ending of school year
  (Oct, Nov, Dec, Jan, Jun)
• Time of Day 12 - 4 P.M. (adults 3 - 5 A.M.)
• Brightest, most talented Protestant from broken
  family

6
Basic Principles of Pastoral Care with Children

• Pray with and for them
• Spend time with them get to know them
• Talk to them talk as an adult
• Interact on their eye level
• Send cards/notes
• Visit in their home their room (with parents
  childs permission) SS class
• Play games they like

7
Ideas for Working with Children

• Sketch pad, crayons, markers
• Puppets
• Ungame, checkers, etc.
• Tape recorder
• Play dough
• Sentence completions (pastor too!)
• Role play