Understanding Separation Anxiety: Causes, Symptoms, and Treatment

1
Understanding Separation Anxiety Causes,
Symptoms, and Treatment May 11, 2023
Whether you're a pet owner leaving your furry
friend at home, a parent dropping off your child
at school, or simply someone struggling with the
fear of being alone, separation anxiety can be a
challenging and overwhelming experience. Separatio
n anxiety is a natural reaction to separation
from someone or something we are emotionally
attached to. It can manifest in various ways and
affect humans and animals of all ages.
Separation anxiety is most commonly associated
with children and their attachment to parents or
caregivers, but it can also be experienced by
adults in relationships or by pet owners leaving
their pets alone. While separation anxiety can be
challenging, strategies and treatments are
available to help manage and overcome it.
Understanding the root causes of separation
anxiety and developing coping mechanisms can
help us and our loved ones feel more comfortable
and confident during times of separation.
Continue reading to learn how anxiety therapy and
childrens counseling can help manage the stress
during separation anxiety in children, parents,
and adults. What is Separation Anxiety?
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Separation anxiety is a psychological condition
characterized by excessive fear or distress when
an individual is separated from someone or
something they are emotionally attached to. The
fear or distress experienced can be intense and
negatively impact an individual's daily
life. Separation anxiety is most commonly
associated with children, especially those
between the ages of 8 months to 3 years, who
develop a strong attachment to their primary
caregiver, often their mother. Separation
anxiety can also be experienced by older
children, adolescents, and adults, especially
those who have experienced significant life
changes such as divorce, moving to a new city,
or losing someone loved. The causes of separation
anxiety can be complex and vary from person to
person. In children, separation anxiety is often
a normal part of development as they begin to
form attachments and understand the concept of
object permanence, the idea that objects continue
to exist even when they are out of sight.
However, separation anxiety can persist beyond
the normal developmental stage for some children
and become a more significant issue. In adults,
separation anxiety can stem from various factors,
including attachment issues, childhood
experiences, trauma, and personality disorders.
For example, if you have a history of
abandonment or neglect, you may be more prone to
experiencing separation anxiety. Additionally, if
you have anxiety disorders, such as generalized
anxiety disorder, you may be more susceptible to
experiencing separation anxiety. Separation
anxiety symptoms can manifest both physically and
emotionally. Physical symptoms can include
headaches, stomach aches, and nausea. Common
emotional symptoms include excessive worrying,
fear of abandonment, panic attacks, and an
inability to concentrate. Fortunately, various
anxiety treatments like mindfulness-based therapy
and coping strategies are available to help
manage separation anxiety. In adults, therapy,
medication, and cognitive- behavioral techniques
such as relaxation techniques and exposure
therapy can be helpful. In children, gradual
exposure to separation and positive reinforcement
can effectively reduce symptoms. What are Some
Common Separation Anxiety Symptoms? Separation
anxiety usually manifests itself around the third
or fourth grade. They may begin following a
break from school, like during the holidays or
summer, or following a long-term illness. When
you leave, your child may refuse to go or throw a
temper tantrum. Each child may have unique
symptoms. Some of the symptoms of separation
anxiety in adults are similar to those of
separation anxiety in children.The following are
the most common symptoms of separation anxiety
in children and adults How Does Separation
Anxiety Feel Like in Children?
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• Separation anxiety can be a challenging condition
  for children, and it can manifest in several
  ways. Here are some common ways that separation
  anxiety feels in children
• Fear and Distress If your child suffers from
  separation anxiety, they may often feel intense
  fear and distress when separated from you if you
  are their primary caregiver, especially their
  mother. This fear can be intense, and your child
  may worry that you will not return or that
  something unpleasant will happen to them or you,
  their caregiver.
• Crying and Clingy Behavior Children may cry,
  scream or display clingy behavior when their
  caregiver tries to leave them. They may follow
  the caregiver around the house or refuse to let
  them out of sight.
• 75 of children with separation anxiety exhibit
  some form of school refusal behavior
• Refusal to Attend School or Daycare If your
  child has separation anxiety, they may refuse to
  attend school or daycare because they do not want
  to be separated from you, their caregiver. This
  leads to academic and social difficulties. In its
  most severe form, SAD may result in school
  refusal and disruption in educational
  attainment. It has been estimated that
  approximately 75 of children with separation
  anxiety exhibit some form of school-refusal
  behavior.
• Difficulty Sleeping Alone Children with
  separation anxiety may have trouble sleeping
  alone. They may often wake up at night and
  require their caregiver to be with them to fall
  asleep.
• Physical Symptoms Separation anxiety can also
  cause physical symptoms such as headaches,
  stomach aches, and nausea. These symptoms can be
  distressing for your child and can impact their
  daily functioning.
• Worry About Caregiver's Safety Children may
  worry about their caregiver's safety when
  separated. They may fear that their caregiver
  will be in an accident or get sick.
• Fear of Abandonment Children with separation
  anxiety may fear abandonment. They may worry
  that you, their caregiver will leave them or not
  return.
• How Does Separation Anxiety Feel Like in Adults?
• Separation anxiety is not limited to children and
  can affect adults as well. Here are some
• common ways that separation anxiety feels in
  adults
• Intense Worry and Fear If you're an adult
  dealing with separation anxiety, you may often
  experience intense worry and fear about being
  separated from your loved ones or pets. This fear
  can be overwhelming and make it challenging for
  you to function daily.
• Difficulty Forming or Maintaining Relationships
  Adults with separation anxiety may struggle to
  form or maintain relationships due to their fear
  of being separated from their loved ones. You may
  avoid forming close relationships or excessively
  cling to your partners, friends, or family
  members.
• Avoidance Behaviors Adults with separation
  anxiety may engage in avoidance behaviors to
  prevent separation from their loved ones. For
  example, you may avoid going to work or social
  events, refuse to travel, or avoid situations
  where you may be separated from your loved ones.
• Panic Attacks Separation anxiety can also cause
  panic attacks in adults. These attacks may be
  triggered by thoughts of being separated from
  your loved ones or pets or may occur when you are
  separated from them.
• Physical Symptoms Separation anxiety may cause
  physical symptoms like headaches, stomach aches,
  and nausea in you. These symptoms can be
  distressing and may impact your daily
  functioning.

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• The causes of separation anxiety can be complex,
  and multiple factors can contribute to its
  development. Early intervention and treatment can
  help manage the symptoms and improve your
  child's overall well-being. As parents and
  caregivers, you can seek help from mental health
  professionals specializing in treating separation
  anxiety disorders to provide appropriate support
  and guidance. Similarly, early detection of
  separation anxiety in adults and proper guidance
  can significantly benefit them.
• What are the Causes of Separation Anxiety in
  Children?
• Here are a few common causes of separation
  anxiety in children
• Genetics Research indicates that genetics can
  play a role in the development of separation
  anxiety. If your family has a history of anxiety
  disorders, including separation anxiety, your
  child is more likely to develop the condition.
• Environmental Factors Environmental factors such
  as trauma, stressful life events, or changes in
  the child's routine or environment can trigger
  separation anxiety. For example, moving to a new
  house, a new school, or losing a loved one can
  trigger separation anxiety in your child.
• Attachment Issues Separation anxiety can arise
  due to attachment issues between the child and
  their primary caregiver. If you have been an
  inconsistent or unpredictable caregiver to your
  child or if your child has experienced early
  separation from you, they may be more prone to
  developing separation anxiety.
• Overprotective Parenting Parents who are
  overprotective or excessively anxious may
  unintentionally reinforce separation anxiety in
  their children. For example, if you are overly
  concerned about your child's safety, you may
  avoid leaving them alone or express fear about
  separation, which can increase the child's
  anxiety.
• Behavioral Inhibition Some children may have an
  innate temperament characterized by behavioral
  inhibition, which means they are prone to
  shyness, fear, and anxiety in new or unfamiliar
  situations. Children with this temperament may be
  more prone to developing separation anxiety.
• Cognitive Factors Separation anxiety can be
  influenced by cognitive factors such as
  unrealistic thoughts or beliefs about
  separation. For example, your child may believe
  that separation from you, their caregiver, will
  result in harm to either themselves or you.
• What are the Causes of Separation Anxiety in
  Adults?
• Separation anxiety in adults can have various
  causes, including

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• Childhood Experiences If you have experienced
  separation anxiety as a child, you may be more
  likely to develop it in adulthood. Separation
  from a primary caregiver at an early age or
  experiencing traumatic events such as neglect or
  abuse can also contribute to the development of
  separation anxiety in adulthood.
• Life Transitions Major life transitions such as
  moving to a new place, starting a new job, or
  going through a breakup or divorce can trigger
  feelings of separation anxiety. These changes can
  disrupt your sense of security and stability,
  leading to feelings of fear and uncertainty.
• Trauma Traumatic experiences like physical or
  emotional abuse, neglect, or a significant loss
  can trigger separation anxiety in adults. Trauma
  can affect your ability to trust others and feel
  safe in relationships, leading to anxiety and
  fear of separation.
• Anxiety Disorders If you have a history of
  anxiety disorders, you may be more prone to
  developing separation anxiety. Other anxiety
  disorders, like panic disorder or social anxiety
  disorder, may also contribute to the development
  of separation anxiety.
• Substance Abuse Substance abuse can disrupt
  brain chemistry and contribute to anxiety
  disorders, including separation anxiety.
  Substance use can also be a coping mechanism for
  underlying feelings of anxiety and fear of
  separation.
• Is It Okay to Have Separation Anxiety?
• You may sometimes wonder whether it's okay for
  you or your child to have separation anxiety.
  Well, the answer to the question is yes. It is
  normal to experience some level of separation
  anxiety, especially during childhood development.
  However, it can become a concern when the
  anxiety symptoms become excessive or start to
  interfere with daily activities.
• Mild separation anxiety is considered normal and
  can help your child to develop a healthy
  attachment to you or their primary caregivers.
  However, when the anxiety becomes persistent and
  excessive, it can cause significant distress to
  the child and impact their development,
  socialization, and daily functioning.
• In adults, separation anxiety can interfere with
  the ability to build and maintain healthy
  relationships and can significantly impact their
  quality of life. It is essential to recognize and
  seek help if the symptoms of separation anxiety
  become persistent, excessive, and start to impact
  your daily life.
• Mental health professionals can provide support
  and guidance in developing coping strategies,
  identifying triggers, and addressing underlying
  issues that may contribute to anxiety. With
  appropriate treatment and support, people with
  separation anxiety can learn to manage their
  symptoms and live a healthy, fulfilling life.
• How to Deal with Separation Anxiety?
• Dealing with separation anxiety can be
  challenging, but there are ways to manage and
  overcome it. Counseling and self-healing
  techniques have successfully treated separation
  anxiety in children and adults. Mentioned below
  are some methods for addressing separation
  anxiety through counseling and self-healing
• How to Deal with Separation Anxiety Through
  Counseling?

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• Counseling can be an effective way to help
  children and adults cope with separation anxiety.
  It's important to find a counselor who has
  experience working with children and is
  compassionate and patient to help your child
  feel safe and supported as they learn to manage
  their anxiety.
• Similarly, it's essential to find a therapist who
  specializes in treating separation anxiety in
  adults and uses evidence-based therapies, such
  as CBT or exposure therapy.
• Dealing with Separation Anxiety In Children
• Counseling can be an effective way to assist
  children in managing their separation anxiety.
  Here are some ways a counselor can work with the
  child
• Identifying triggers Separation anxiety can have
  specific triggers, such as separation from a
  parent or caregiver or fear of being alone. A
  counselor can work with your child to identify
  these triggers, which can help them recognize
  and manage their feelings when they arise.
• Relaxation techniques A counselor can teach your
  child relaxation techniques, like progressive
  muscle relaxation, deep breathing, etc. These
  techniques can help them cope with anxiety by
  calming their mind and body.
• Cognitive-behavioral therapy Cognitive-behavioral
  therapy focuses on identifying and altering
  negative thought patterns and behaviors
  contributing to anxiety. A counselor can work
  with your child to challenge negative thoughts
  and develop more positive coping strategies.
• Exposure therapy Exposure therapy uses gradually
  exposing the child to situations that trigger
  their anxiety while providing support and
  guidance to help them learn to cope with their
  feelings. This helps your child become more
  comfortable with separation and reduces anxiety.
• Play therapy Play therapy can be a helpful way
  for young children to express and process their
  feelings about separation anxiety in a safe and
  supportive environment. The counselor may use
  toys, games, and other activities to help your
  child explore their emotions and develop coping
  skills.
• Parent involvement In some cases, counseling may
  involve working with the child's parents to
  develop strategies for managing their child's
  separation anxiety. The counselor can guide you
  on gradually increasing separation time or using
  a comfort object, such as a special toy or
  blanket, to help your child feel more secure.
  Your involvement can also help you understand
  your child's feelings and develop a plan to
  support them.
• Dealing with Separation Anxiety In Adults
• Separation anxiety in adults can be a challenging
  and distressing experience. However, seeking
  therapy can be a helpful way to manage separation
  anxiety. Here are some ways in which therapy can
  help
• 1. Identifying triggers A therapist can help you
  understand the underlying causes of your
  separation anxiety, which can help you recognize
  and manage your feelings. One of the primary ways
  a therapist can help is by identifying triggers.
  By identifying your specific triggers, you can
  learn to develop coping mechanisms and
  strategies to manage your anxiety when you
  encounter those triggers.

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• Developing coping strategies Another way therapy
  can help is by developing coping strategies.
  Your therapist will teach you relaxation
  techniques like visualization, deep breathing,
  and progressive muscle relaxation to help you
  cope with anxiety. They can also help you build
  healthy coping mechanisms when you feel anxious.
• Addressing negative thought patterns Addressing
  negative thought patterns is another approach
  that can help manage separation anxiety. A
  separation anxiety therapist can help you
  identify and challenge negative thought patterns
  contributing to your anxiety. They can help you
  develop more positive and realistic ways of
  thinking about separation.
• Exposure therapy Exposure therapy is a technique
  that involves gradually exposing you to
  situations that trigger your anxiety in a
  controlled and safe environment. A separation
  anxiety therapist will guide you through this
  process to help you overcome your anxiety. This
  technique can be effective for individuals with
  severe separation anxiety.
• Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT)
  Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) is another
  type of therapy that focuses on altering
  negative thought patterns and behaviors. A
  therapist can help you identify and change the
  thought patterns and behaviors that contribute to
  your anxiety. By changing these patterns, you
  can learn to manage your anxiety more positively.
• Medication In many cases, medication may be
  prescribed to manage severe separation anxiety. A
  therapist can work with you and your doctor to
  determine if medication is appropriate for your
  situation.
• How to Deal with Separation Anxiety Through
  Self-healing?

• Self-healing can also be a helpful way to support
  children and adults in managing their separation
  anxiety. Dealing with separation anxiety through
  self-healing can involve several strategies.
  It's crucial to be patient and compassionate with
  yourself as you navigate your journey toward
  healing from separation anxiety. However, it's
  important to remember that self- healing should
  not replace professional counseling or therapy
  for children with severe separation anxiety.
• Dealing with Separation Anxiety In Children
• Self-healing can also be a helpful way to support
  children in managing their separation anxiety.
  Here are some tips for self-healing
• Encourage open communication Encourage your
  child to discuss their feelings and concerns
  about separation anxiety. This can help them feel
  heard and supported and may help to ease their
  anxiety.
• Provide reassurance Let your child know that
  they are loved and cared for and that you will
  always be there for them. This can help to build
  their sense of security and resilience.
• Practice relaxation techniques Encouraging your
  child to practice techniques like deep breathing,
  progressive muscle relaxation, or yoga can be
  helpful. These techniques can be helpful in
  calming

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• the body and reducing anxiety.
• Create a routine Establishing a consistent
  routine can help to provide a sense of structure
  and predictability, which can be comforting for
  your child dealing with separation anxiety.
• Use positive affirmations Encourage your child
  to use positive affirmations, such as "I am
  brave" or "I can handle this," to help build
  their self-confidence and resilience.
• Model healthy coping skills Children learn by
  example, so modeling healthy coping skills can be
  an effective way to help your child manage their
  separation anxiety. Practice self-care and
  stress- reduction techniques, and model positive
  ways of coping with stress and anxiety.
• Dealing with Separation Anxiety In Adults
• Dealing with separation anxiety in adults through
  self-healing can involve several strategies.
  Here are some ways to practice self-healing
• Mindfulness meditation Mindfulness meditation
  requires focusing on the present moment and
  developing awareness of your thoughts and
  feelings without judgment. Practicing mindfulness
  meditation can help you manage anxiety by
  reducing stress and increasing your ability to
  cope with difficult emotions.
• Exercise Exercise can help reduce stress and
  anxiety by releasing natural chemicals like
  endorphins in the body to promote feelings of
  well-being. Regular exercise also improves sleep
  quality, which can help manage anxiety symptoms.
• Journaling Writing about your feelings and
  thoughts can help you process and manage your
  emotions. Try keeping a journal to write about
  your experiences with separation anxiety and to
  explore your thoughts and feelings about it.
• Breathing exercises Breathing exercises, like
  deep breathing or progressive muscle relaxation,
  can help you manage anxiety by promoting
  relaxation and reducing stress.
• Self-care Practicing self-care, such as eating a
  healthy diet, engaging in activities you enjoy,
  and getting enough sleep, can help reduce stress
  and improve overall well-being.
• Seek support Talking to a trusted family member
  or friend about your separation anxiety can also
  be helpful. Besides, joining a support group or
  seeking professional counseling can provide
  additional support and guidance in managing
  separation anxiety.
• How Can You Find the Right Separation Anxiety
  Therapist?

Finding the right mental health therapist and
separation anxiety therapist can be a crucial
step toward managing and overcoming separation
anxiety in a child or an adult. Here are some
important tips on how you can find the right
separation anxiety therapist for yourself or your
child
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• Look for a Licensed Professional It is essential
  to look for a licensed mental health professional
  with experience treating separation anxiety.
  Look for a licensed professional, such as a
  licensed clinical social worker, licensed
  professional therapist, and licensed
  psychologist, who has completed the necessary
  training and education to provide mental health
  services.
• Consider Experience Look for a therapist with
  experience treating separation anxiety in
  children and adults. A therapist specializing in
  anxiety disorders may also have experience
  treating separation anxiety.
• Check Credentials Make sure the therapist has
  the appropriate credentials and certifications.
  For example, a therapist may have additional
  certifications in cognitive-behavioral therapy or
  play therapy.
• Look for a Good Fit The right therapist for you
  or your child should be someone with whom you
  feel comfortable and safe. Consider scheduling
  an initial consultation or appointment to
  determine if the therapist is a good fit.
• Consider the Therapist's Approach Look for a
  therapist who uses evidence-based treatments and
  has experience treating separation anxiety using
  various approaches. Cognitive-behavioral
  therapy, play therapy, and parent-child
  interaction therapy are all effective approaches
  for treating separation anxiety.
• Check Insurance Coverage If you have health
  insurance, check your insurance plan to see if
  they cover mental health services. Make sure the
  therapist you choose is in-network to minimize
  out- of-pocket costs.
• Ask for Referrals Ask for referrals from family
  members, friends, or your primary care physician.
  You can also search online for a therapist in
  your area who specializes in treating separation
  anxiety.
• Conclusion
• Separation anxiety can affect children and
  adults, but how it manifests and impacts their
  lives can differ. It's possible to manage and
  overcome separation anxiety through counseling
  and self-healing.
• Working with a licensed counselor can help
  identify triggers, develop coping strategies,
  address negative thought patterns, and engage in
  therapy. Parents can also participate in
  counseling to learn how to manage their child's
  anxiety.
• At Lifebulb, we offer counseling services for
  separation anxiety for children and adults, using
  techniques such as cognitive-behavioral therapy,
  exposure therapy, and relaxation techniques.
  Contact us to schedule an appointment with one of
  our trained therapists.
• Frequently Asked Questions

How long does separation anxiety last? The
duration of separation anxiety can vary depending
on the person and the severity of the symptoms.
For children, separation anxiety typically peaks
between 8-14 months of age and usually resolves
by age 2-3 years. However, sometimes your child
may experience separation anxiety into their
school-age years. In adults, separation anxiety
can be more long-lasting and may persist for
years if left untreated. The length of time it
lasts can depend on the underlying causes and
your willingness to seek treatment and implement
coping strategies. Contacting a mental health
professional is crucial if separation anxiety
persists and interferes with daily activities,
relationships, and overall well-being. With the
right treatment and support, separation anxiety
can be effectively managed and overcome.
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How can you prevent separation anxiety from
developing in a child? What is the difference
between separation anxiety in parents and
children?
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