FamilyBased Youth Ministry

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Family-Based Youth Ministry
Department of Family Ministry The Lutheran
Church--Missouri Synod
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Three Basic Questions To Consider
I. What business are you in?
II. Hows business these days?
III. Is it time to rethink your
business plan?
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I. What Business Are You In?
Search the Seven Cs For The Business Youre
Really In!
Are you in
the Chuckles business? Keep them off the
streets and having fun!
the Chaperone business? Keep their
hormones in check!
the Chauffeur business? Keep those
doggies rolling!
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Are you in
the Counselor business? Listen and offer
your sage advise!
the Community service business? Do good
deeds in the neighborhood!
the Classroom business? Teach doctrine
and confirmation trivia!
the Christ business? Nurture young
people as the Holy Spirit develops within them
mature, integrated faith in Jesus Christ as
their Lord and Savior!
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II. Hows Business These Days?
THAT WAS THEN, THIS IS NOW
YOUTH GROUP 1973 YOUTH GROUP 1998
Meetings . ..Meetings
Bible Studies Bible Studies
Lock-Ins Lock-Ins
Retreats Retreats
Rallies Youth Gatherings
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THAT WAS THEN, THIS IS NOW
YOUTH GROUP 1973 YOUTH GROUP 1998
Sunday School Classes Sunday School Classes
Concerts Concerts
Were the Experts Were the Experts
Church Centered Church Centered
Home Supported Home Supported
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Despite the massive culture changes in the last
25 years, most churches still use old paradigms
in their ministry approaches. They work harder
and harder with old models that might have worked
in the past, but no longer do. Intuitively, they
know that what they do is no longer effective,
and yet, they still remain locked in the attitude
of business as usual, and complain about the
present state of affairs.
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Assess these 9 vital signs in your youth ministry
? Post Confirmation Involvement
? Percentage of involved teens in your
church/school
? Varieties of entry points for youth
involvement
? Percentage of young people in Sunday worship
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? Number of youth who developed into adult
congregational leaders
? Youth involved with adult church leaders in
parish planning
? Involvement of youths parents in
congregational life
? Faith development spiritual maturity of youth
? Dramatic differences between church youth and
secular peers relative to attitudes, behaviors,
and lifestyles
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Now ask yourself Hows Business
These Days?
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The youth programs of many churches do a good
job of entertaining the young people and keeping
them busy, but do little in the way of bringing
them into responsible positions within the church
community. Jack Balswick, The Family
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Bad News Barna

• Question to teenager

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• The life values of Christian teenagers are
  often indistinguishable from societys life
  values.
• George Barna, Generation Next

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III. IS IT TIME TO RETHINK YOUR BUSINESS
PLAN?
Research continues to show that, for better or
for worse, a teens family represents the most
influential network of earthly relationships in
his or her life. For this simple reason, we
believe that the most effective youth ministry
always takes place in the context of the
family. Tom Lytle, Kelly Schartz, Gary
Hartke 101 Ways To Be Family-Friendly in
Youth Ministry
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Without parental support, the likelihood of a
teen continuing in the faith as an adult is
reduced significantly. Wayne Rice, Tag
Team Youth Ministry
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In truth, families make or break disciples, and
in the process the task of the church is made
easier or more difficult. Dennis Guernsey, A
New Design for Family Ministry
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RESEARCH FROM SEARCH
A family has more influence on a young persons
growth in faith than anything that happens in a
congregation or youth ministry.
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Four Important Dynamics For Faith Development In
The Home

• Talking about the faith with mom
• Talking about the faith with dad
• Having family devotions prayers
• Doing family projects to help others

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Despite this research, few parents receive
guidance from their congregations in how to do
these four important dynamics.
L.C.M.S. youth (13-18 years old) report
Talking about the faith with Mom 30
Talking about the faith with Dad 16
Family devotions prayers 16
Family projects to help others 8
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• Fewer than 1 in 4 LCMS congregations actively
  work to strengthen families in nurturing the
  Christian faith in their teenagers.
• Parents, especially fathers, would benefit from
  congregations that emphasize parent education
  support as part of their youth program.

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• For years now, in survey after survey, parents
  emerge as the undisputed, unbeaten, and untied
  champions of spiritual impact on kids lives. No
  one, no matter how mega-riffic their ministry,
  makes more of a difference in kids spiritual
  growth than their parents.

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Yet it is as if the church has given up on
parents as spiritual leaders for their young
people. We create programs and ministries
designed to usurp, not fuel, parents as spiritual
trainers. Weve communicated that the church,
not the home, is the best place for young people
to find encouragement and accountability in their
journey with God. Rick Lawrence,
Looking Forward, Group Magazine
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Its no longer a question of whether
Ill embrace a more family-focused approach to
youth ministry. Its now just a question of how
Ill do it. Dave Rahn, Parafamily Youth
Ministry, Group Magazine
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ITS NOW JUST A QUESTION OF HOW ILL DO IT
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HOW NOT TO DO IT

• Build something

• Hire someone new

• Add a family night or a topical workshop on
  Sundays

• Start a counseling service in a spare office

• Ask the Voters for a bigger budget next year

• Target only your member families

• Create another committee to study the matter

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Principles In Family-Based Youth Ministry

• Develop a family attitude/outlook/ perspective/min
  dset in everything you plan and do for the youth.
  Think family.

• Involve parents and youth together as often as
  feasibly possible, not merely as
  chaperones/chauffeurs/observers, but as real
  partners in ministry.

• Embrace diversity, realizing all families are not
  alike.

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Principles In Family-Based Youth Ministry

• Build trusting relationships between family
  members through activities and faith events.

• Create opportunities and provide resources for
  families to talk about Jesus together outside of
  and inside of their own homes.

• Teach parents and children to conduct family
  devotions together, including mutual prayer for
  one another. The family that prays together
  stays together. Research has proven this.

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Principles In Family-Based Youth Ministry

• Help the family become involved in community
  service. Put faith into tangible action. Be
  doers of the Word, not hearers only.

• Try a variety of approaches, and measure the
  results. One size doesnt fit all. Be specific.
  Be achievable. Be measurable.

• Corporately celebrate family milestones--wet
  cement moments in the life of your church.

• Be home-centered, church supported. Faith
  maturity properly occurs in the home, not the
  youth room.

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Principles In Family-Based Youth Ministry

• Ask will this strengthen or weaken the
  family?

• Remember that the best planning tool might be
  your eraser!

• Tweak your present youth ministry to be
  family-based and family-friendly.

• Empower parents to be the spiritual trainers of
  their own teenagers.

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Principles In Family-Based Youth Ministry

• Build your youth ministry program around the
  needs of families, rather than expecting families
  to shape their lives around the needs of your
  youth ministry program.

• Provide opportunities for youth and adults to
  spend quality time together.

• Transform parent meetings into opportunities to
  partner together for shared goals and support.

• Consider becoming father-focused in the faith
  development of kids.

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Principles In Family-Based Youth Ministry

• Be aware that just as there are a variety of
  family structures with a variety of family needs,
  there must be a variety of family ministries.

• Realize there is no single book/program/kit that
  will do family ministry for your church.

• Understand that ministry to families will take
  many forms and will look different from church to
  church.

• Realize that strategic planning is needed to
  avoid random acts of family ministry.

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Some Practical Ideas For Family-Based Youth
Ministry

• Sponsor family learning seminars based on family
  input
• Provide families with a variety of information on
  child development
• Lend families books and tapes on parenting
• Link parents with community resources
• Establish a family resource center in your church

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Some Practical Ideas For Family-Based Youth
Ministry

• Initiate support/care groups for families around
  special interests/needs
• Communicate to both parents and teens, especially
  fathers
• Involve the total family in award and recognition
  events
• Involve parents in youth ministry beyond the
  typical avenues

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Some Practical Ideas For Family-Based Youth
Ministry

• Create Bible studies that can involve the entire
  family
• Provide opportunities for families to be involved
  in the Sunday worship service
• Teach parents how to conduct family devotions and
  prayer time
• Create and mail a family newsletter for all
  homes
• Offer parent-youth retreats

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Some Practical Ideas For Family-Based Youth
Ministry

• Parent Classes on Faith Development of Kids
• Parental Involvement with Confirmation and/or
  Sunday School instruction
• Packets of Resources for Homes
• Talk Pieces for Families (Faith Talk Cards
  placemats etc.)
• Intergenerational Vacation Bible School
• Mother/Daughter Father/Son events

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Some Practical Ideas For Family-Based Youth
Ministry

• Family Choirs
• Family Servant Events
• Intergenerational Bible Studies
• Family Midweek Logos Approach (Meal/Devo/Study/Gam
  es/Music)
• Ministry Milestones
• Parent-Teen Sexuality Classes
• Parent-Teen Communication Clinics

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RESOURCES TO CONSIDER
The Family Friendly Church, Ben Freudenberg,
Group Publishing 1-800-447-1070 Family-Based
Youth Ministry, Mark DeVries, Inter-Varsity
Press 1-800-843-7225 Youth Workers Handbook
To Family Ministry, Chap Clark, Youth
Specialties 1-800-776-8008 A New Day For Family
Ministry, Richard Olson/Joe Leonard, Alban
Institute 1-800-251-3320 130 Ways To Involve
Parents In Youth Ministry, Martin Nagy, Ed.,
Group Publishing 1-800-447-1070